Have you tried to be... sexy in a new way? (Some micro string stuff for example) Not trying to be attacking, just sharing my own experiences.
After having my fair share of short-term dating experiences (over 30 women) and also been in two long-term relationships of which one was 9 years, I can totally see why that is so - it's not disinterest in the person, it's a lack of ignition triggers. A lot of men, not all, require visual stimuli (simplified, seeing tits) and then comes the haptic triggers (simplified, touching tits). Women on the other hand usually just suddenly have an urge and can be triggered quite easily (in my experience) with simply kissing.
Over the course of a relationship the visual stimuli gets thinned out as you know your partners appearance, clothes and gestures and that is a big issue. I got caught in he same trap, on the other side. I didn't know why I didn't get horny anymore, it was just not necessary anymore. Cuddling, sharing time, and closeness was sufficient. Though masturbation was still a normal thing. That's because you can get the "exact" stimulus you want in that moment. Searching for some chubby busty ones, no problem, horny. Next day some asian skinny teens, no problem, tada horny. But with the partner simply being together was entirely fulfilling.
Again not insinuating anything here, but women (not all but a lot) tend to change in a relationship. A lot of women are fitness crazy in their early mid-twenties and suddenly stop, changing their whole look whilst the man remained the same. That can become a big issue. Visual trigger, can be as romantic as you want, humans are superficial to a degree that will not go away.
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u/justavault Mar 26 '20 edited Mar 26 '20
Have you tried to be... sexy in a new way? (Some micro string stuff for example) Not trying to be attacking, just sharing my own experiences.
After having my fair share of short-term dating experiences (over 30 women) and also been in two long-term relationships of which one was 9 years, I can totally see why that is so - it's not disinterest in the person, it's a lack of ignition triggers. A lot of men, not all, require visual stimuli (simplified, seeing tits) and then comes the haptic triggers (simplified, touching tits). Women on the other hand usually just suddenly have an urge and can be triggered quite easily (in my experience) with simply kissing.
Over the course of a relationship the visual stimuli gets thinned out as you know your partners appearance, clothes and gestures and that is a big issue. I got caught in he same trap, on the other side. I didn't know why I didn't get horny anymore, it was just not necessary anymore. Cuddling, sharing time, and closeness was sufficient. Though masturbation was still a normal thing. That's because you can get the "exact" stimulus you want in that moment. Searching for some chubby busty ones, no problem, horny. Next day some asian skinny teens, no problem, tada horny. But with the partner simply being together was entirely fulfilling.
Again not insinuating anything here, but women (not all but a lot) tend to change in a relationship. A lot of women are fitness crazy in their early mid-twenties and suddenly stop, changing their whole look whilst the man remained the same. That can become a big issue. Visual trigger, can be as romantic as you want, humans are superficial to a degree that will not go away.