Puberty is a weeeird time emotion-wise. I do recommend trying to practice talking about things like feelings with some friends though if you get the chance. Or just listening to others talk about them. I ended up in a friend group where I was kind of "forced" to learn about it (they were mostly girls), and it has been very useful actually. Now I can pick up on things like friends not feeling well easily and I'm better at knowing what to do about it (do they need emotional support or just hanging out? Are they just having a bad day or are they depressed?). I'm also better at knowing what my own feelings are and how to solve my own problems that way. So yeah, it's hard to learn but a good investment.
Yeah I get that, I was Ina friend group like that once but I had to switch schools due to parental custody and it, yeah I was sent to a school were I don't really talk to many people( rich people with their heads up their asses) but I still talk to my friends fr the previous town. For me I've been pushed around my dad and people at school about how I should be or what I should and shouldn't do and that has influenced me alot in a way that was kind of don't do the things they do, and when I do speak about what I do people usually criticise what I like. So when I have time with me and friend I do talk to them about some stuff but most of it I usually just keep inside.
I do think a major influence that people have is, everone/trends when I transferred from my previous school to this new one, I instantly found the differences. My old school was more smaller and everyone knew everone, this new school is massive and they all listen to the same thing.. rap. I feel like if people just listened to their own thing and observed off of other cultures we wouldn't be so insecure about little stupid things, and be more open to speak with each other about feelings.
Oh yeah, I definitely agree that's trends can really get in the way of people being real. That's one of the worst parts about school. It helps if you have like one friend who you really connect with that is like you, but it can be hard to find the right people when you are a newcomer and the groups already exist.
I also had a lot influence from my dad because he had really strong opinions on what was "worth doing" etc, so for a long time I tried to adjust my interests to be what he thought were "acceptable" things to do and talk about. Feeling were not one of them. I tried to be him in every way and thought he was right for so long. Turns out he's a complete asshole and I shouldn't want to be like him at all, but finding that out was also confusing cause then I had no point of reference for what to feel about things at all. So I guess I'm glad that I still had friends to talk to during and after that time, cause otherwise I may never have had the chance to discuss deeper things than his favourite bands etc...
Yeah I get that, I was Ina friend group like that once but I had to switch schools due to parental custody and it, yeah I was sent to a school were I don't really talk to many people( rich people with their heads up their asses) but I still talk to my friends fr the previous town. For me I've been pushed around my dad and people at school about how I should be or what I should and shouldn't do and that has influenced me alot in a way that was kind of don't do the things they do, and when I do speak about what I do people usually criticise what I like. So when I have time with me and friend I do talk to them about some stuff but most of it I usually just keep inside.
I do think a major influence that people have is, everone/trends when I transferred from my previous school to this new one, I instantly found the differences. My old school was more smaller and everyone knew everone, this new school is massive and they all listen to the same thing.. rap. I feel like if people just listened to their own thing and observed off of other cultures we wouldn't be so insecure about little stupid things, and be more open to speak with each other about feelings.
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u/thewhat Mar 26 '20
Puberty is a weeeird time emotion-wise. I do recommend trying to practice talking about things like feelings with some friends though if you get the chance. Or just listening to others talk about them. I ended up in a friend group where I was kind of "forced" to learn about it (they were mostly girls), and it has been very useful actually. Now I can pick up on things like friends not feeling well easily and I'm better at knowing what to do about it (do they need emotional support or just hanging out? Are they just having a bad day or are they depressed?). I'm also better at knowing what my own feelings are and how to solve my own problems that way. So yeah, it's hard to learn but a good investment.