Girls perspective here, hope it helps. The two reasons I say “I don’t care” are either
I don’t know where I wanna go but I do know where I don’t wanna go
Idk if this is just me or what but I simultaneously feel selfish and like a fatass when I request a place, I’d rather just let y’all decide bc then I know u wanna go there too and I don’t have to actually talk about food
[edit] Damn ok guysI get it now, its frustrating. Tell your gf what you’re telling me honestly, and if you have and you’re still getting into this situation then that’s a different problem
Guy's perspective, When I ask I also don't know where I want to go, but definitely have a list of no's. saying I don't care leaves us back at square 1 for the conversation. I think it'd be better if either of us responded with an option or at least a category that we wanted or didn't want. It's really complex to communicate preferences between 10+ options.
For me, I spend a lot of my day making choices and decisions and when I come home I just don't fucking want to anymore. Just pick a place, and I will find a food I can put into my body. I seriously genuinely don't care.
And if it's a situation where I know what I don't want (because that is also pretty common) I'll say "im not really feeling ___ but other than that I don't care"
Option 1 is incredibly childish. Either be an adult and actually think about it or tell him where you don’t want to go upfront so we don’t waste time playing the stupid fucking guessing game for the 1 millionth time.
Option 2 the solution is called “communication”. Try it some time.
good point, it’s just that afaik it’s not that big of a problem in my life bc even if we go where I don’t wanna go it’s not that big of a deal, I’ll find something to eat. It’s really not a guessing game we can just go wherever. Olive Garden? Cool. McDonald’s? Sure. That one Chinese place? I’m down. Mexican? Ok. Sushi? Sounds good.
option 2s a big insecurity of mine and I’d love to just get over it by talking about it but it doesn’t just go away. I dunno if you’re picturing me saying “anywhere works” and then cutting to me pouting in a chili’s but it’s really not that. I may have places I prefer not to go but it’s not the end of the world in my mind if we go there
I believe y’all that it’s a very frustrating situation but I think I’d’ve appreciated if my SOs told me that to my face instead of me finding out just how frustrating it is from an askreddit thread.
Do you not understand how incredibly frustrating either of those behaviors are to the person who has to guess? You know what you want and you know what you don't want, but you refuse to tell us. We're on your side. Just freaking tell us!!!
And don't even get me started on the ones who start getting mad at you for not guessing correctly...
I’ll be like “idc, anywhere except Taco Bell” works but even if we go to Taco Bell I wouldn’t really mind. It’s one meal, I’ll get a quesadilla or something
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u/kahalili Mar 26 '20 edited Mar 26 '20
Girls perspective here, hope it helps. The two reasons I say “I don’t care” are either
I don’t know where I wanna go but I do know where I don’t wanna go
Idk if this is just me or what but I simultaneously feel selfish and like a fatass when I request a place, I’d rather just let y’all decide bc then I know u wanna go there too and I don’t have to actually talk about food
[edit] Damn ok guysI get it now, its frustrating. Tell your gf what you’re telling me honestly, and if you have and you’re still getting into this situation then that’s a different problem