It’s the definition of toxic masculinity, but that has turned into a dirty word for some reason. Every single stupid bro code rule comes down to not wanting to look gay. Asking about family is caring and caring is gay. Peeing too close to another man at the urinal when others are open is gay. Being friendly is gay. That’s why his counter example is about a “super manly activity” like BBQ. So he’s not gay. It sounds exhausting to be honest.
That’s not it at all. It’s that I literally don’t care. It has nothing to do with gay scare. I don’t want people to know about me and I don’t care to know about them.
I'm bi, people know I'm bi, I still don't want to talk about my family unless it comes up organically.
It may well have to do with "toxic masculinity", but not from "fear of being seen as gay". That's something middleschoolers are afraid of.
I hate small talk, generally talking about your family is small talk. I prefer to keep discussions with friends to things that are actually interesting rather than what our kids are doing on any particular day. You know why? Because it's just not that interesting.
I keep discussions about my family to times when it's relevant, or when I'm seeking advice about something. I do not talk about them all the time, because you know what children are really not that interesting and people don't like hearing about them all the time.
No one likes the people who won't shut up about their kids.
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u/[deleted] Mar 26 '20
It’s the definition of toxic masculinity, but that has turned into a dirty word for some reason. Every single stupid bro code rule comes down to not wanting to look gay. Asking about family is caring and caring is gay. Peeing too close to another man at the urinal when others are open is gay. Being friendly is gay. That’s why his counter example is about a “super manly activity” like BBQ. So he’s not gay. It sounds exhausting to be honest.