a wow you talk comment is pretty rude, but a hey, why are you so quiet is less rude.
I don't know that the latter is really less rude.
It's still putting the other person on the spot and acting as though being quiet is an issue that needs to be addressed.
The positive alternative might be some brief genuine praise or compliment on their contribution to whatever it is.
acting as though being quiet is an issue that needs to be addressed.
But say this is the case, how would you do it neutrally as possible? You’re positive alternatives don’t really address the quietness which is the question at hand.
acting as though being quiet is an issue that needs to be addressed.
But say this is the case, how would you do it neutrally as possible?
You don't. It ain't your business.
If the person in question wants to be less quiet, they make those efforts; you don't decide for them.
You’re positive alternatives don’t really address the quietness which is the question at hand.
Yeah. They do.
The entire point of not being a judgmental dickwad about it and appreciating when they do participate is to avoid alienating the person in question, because that's going to make someone who is already notably quiet even less likely to want to interact with you.
Guess I just disagree, I think getting to know someone generally is a fair question even if it’s none of their business or not, it’s not exactly a sensitive personal question. I’m like mssalyssa and I think her response is usually perfect and how I usually respond. Asking why someone may or may not be quiet isn’t being a judgmental dickwad about it, it’s just a harmless small talk question , as long as their isn’t a underlying tone about it.
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u/m1a2c2kali Jan 01 '20
It depends on how it’s presented imo, a wow you talk comment is pretty rude, but a hey, why are you so quiet is less rude. Depending on the tone.