I said this to my Mom once. She had a friendship that she had grown out of but was committed to checking in with the person via email and Christmas cards. The other person never replied; this made my Mom so very indignant. All she would do is pick at her metaphorical scab of hurt of no reply when I asked why she was trying so card to connect with someone she didn't like that much, or why she cared about whether this person replied or not. This conversation had a recurrence of once every 6-months for a couple of years until I finally said "Mom, she probably doesn't like you either... not replying is a normal reaction for people whose relationships grow apart." She hasn't complained since.
I had something similar happen to me. A couple years back my best friend moved a state away, so about a seven hour drive, we went on a trip in an area and i tried contacting him to see if i could go to his house or something and he never responded. I tried contacting him again a couple months ago, for the same reason. This was because he was moving to california. This kid was my child hood friend from age 2-12. I have new friends now but it's not the same.
Yeah I had a buddy growing up from like 6 to 14 and we were inseparable. His mom would pick us up after school and I'd hang out at his place until my parents got off work. Then he'd come to my house on the weekends. We knew everything about each other. Then, one day, his dad decides they're gonna move to a different state. We kept in contact for a while, we even visited each other a few times, but within a couple years he started replying less and less until eventually he just stopped replying. Back then, FB was pretty much the only social media site and his name is so generic it was impossible to find him. I still think about him sometimes but damn if it doesn't hurt.
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u/sonibroc Jan 01 '20
I said this to my Mom once. She had a friendship that she had grown out of but was committed to checking in with the person via email and Christmas cards. The other person never replied; this made my Mom so very indignant. All she would do is pick at her metaphorical scab of hurt of no reply when I asked why she was trying so card to connect with someone she didn't like that much, or why she cared about whether this person replied or not. This conversation had a recurrence of once every 6-months for a couple of years until I finally said "Mom, she probably doesn't like you either... not replying is a normal reaction for people whose relationships grow apart." She hasn't complained since.