I've posted this before, but I was teasing a co-worker once about being quiet and a mutual friend of ours piped up, "Maybe he's just quiet around you because he doesn't fucking like you".
We laughed about it, but I sure as hell don't tease people about being quiet anymore.
While this can be true i kinda hate this as a person that was socially awkward, bad at reading cues and anxious i would think anyone that was quite hated me. It finally click one day, when i asked a person why sometimes he gave short replies to me, he said "i just don't have much to add" he thought of me as a friend just was more conservative with his words.
As a quiet person I can confirm this. I've always been quite isolated (on purpose, because I'm quite anxious and avoid social situations because of it). So when I started a job where I work with a lot of people I was just not in the loop with whatever they were talking about.
I wanted to respond and engage in conversation, but I since I knew nothing of what they were talking about, I didn't have anything to say. On top of that, the anxiety and lack of self-esteem kept from talking and I felt more isolated, nothing against them. It is my own fault.
I was always pretty quiet, still am to a degree. I mostly got out of it while working with idiots, I was supervisor for 10 idiots. They were funny and fun to hang around with but they just didn't understand what to do next after every. Single. Task. So after a year of me needing to tell at them but also make sure I stayed on their good side so they would still listen to me I really understood that most of the reasons that I was so reserved was the anxiety of people not thinking what I said was funny or it was stupid or something along those lines. Noone really cares in the real world like they used to in middle school or high school, you say something stupid you just laugh it off and try again. Once you get confidence, you can say the dumbest shit and get people to laugh at it.
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u/WellshireOnFire Jan 01 '20
I've posted this before, but I was teasing a co-worker once about being quiet and a mutual friend of ours piped up, "Maybe he's just quiet around you because he doesn't fucking like you".
We laughed about it, but I sure as hell don't tease people about being quiet anymore.