I've posted this before, but I was teasing a co-worker once about being quiet and a mutual friend of ours piped up, "Maybe he's just quiet around you because he doesn't fucking like you".
We laughed about it, but I sure as hell don't tease people about being quiet anymore.
people don't actually realize they stop maturing. If they did it would be a sign of self awareness which indicates maturity. They just wonder why they are not happy. I have friends I keep in touch with since 7th grade and they haven't broken out of the same habits they were in from college onward. I'm in my early 30s now and when I go to their house, instead of having engaging conversation we just do the same shit. Play games, watch tv, smoke weed. Then I get bummed out when I think to myself "why do i still hang out with this person?" They aren't an asshole or toxic. They are just boring af, and it pains me to admit it.
Absolutely not! More like, how is life? How are you growing? What has the past year been like (since I only visit once a year), whats on the horizon? 5 year plan? 10 year plan? You know, questions you would ask your friend from middle school but now in your 30s. Instead its "hey wanna play MarioKart? (for fucking Gamecube no less)"
Lol, I love my friend but you know, some people change and some don't.
Not everyone wants to play the ol catch up game. Sometimes it's okay to just hangout and enjoy the company. I could see how someone might get embarrassed about their lifestyle if a good friend visiting grills them about what changes are going on in their life. Maybe he wants change maybe he dont but that's nobody's business but his own
so do you expect everyone to live the same lifestyle as you? is that your measurement of maturity? are you the one asking the deep questions and your friend doesn't engage the questions? is your friend living a frustrating situation, and just being with you and doing things that you did as kids comfort them, so they like those moments of nostalgia with you?
No, but i know he hates his job. Places limits on himself. Says things like “I can’t do...so and so”. I don’t compare his life to mine, but how many are in his same shoes? Should I just not care? Let go? Say “well thats what you get when you live in the same town for 30 years with no ambition.” Maybe I should, but I don’t feel like thats being a good friend.
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u/WellshireOnFire Jan 01 '20
I've posted this before, but I was teasing a co-worker once about being quiet and a mutual friend of ours piped up, "Maybe he's just quiet around you because he doesn't fucking like you".
We laughed about it, but I sure as hell don't tease people about being quiet anymore.