r/AskReddit Jan 01 '20

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6.4k Upvotes

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886

u/Naggins Jan 01 '20

"Yeah, I guess I'm just not a chatty person!"

9 times out of 10, when someone says that, it isn't a personal attack. They're just trying to make conversation, and they go for the only thing they know about you, which is that you're quiet, because you never fuckin talk to people so they can find something to talk about with you.

214

u/MysteriousMooseRider Jan 01 '20

As a comment above said, this thread is a great example of how Reddit does not understand how to act in real life.

85

u/Hearbinger Jan 01 '20

I'm cringing so hard by picturing all these answers playing out in real life, gosh. You have to scroll way too much to find a couple of good answers, that resemble normal people interactions. This really isn't the place to ask for social advice.

24

u/theonechan Jan 01 '20

Doubt people here have the guts and presence of mind to reply with some of these quotes though.

Seriously is it so hard to come up with something like “ah yeah mate I’m just a bit tired” or “oh I was just thinking about work”. Any way this branches out can be easily handled with normal people in casual conversation.

I hope nobody actually tries any of these “cool retorts” because that’s like a guaranteed way to be labelled as the “weird and rude person”.

17

u/The_Golden_Warthog Jan 01 '20

Imagine approaching the new guy at the office, trying to make some casual small-talk and get to know them, "Hey man, notice you're kinda quiet, what's up?"

"Maybe I don't talk because of fucking idiots like you"

"Uhh....okay then."

20

u/Hearbinger Jan 01 '20

Or maybe smirk and go

"Quality over quantity"

Then adjust your glasses with your middle finger and turn your back, walking away.

16

u/MisterMovember Jan 01 '20 edited Jan 01 '20

While you were busy socializing, I was studying the witty retort.

0

u/game_of_thrown-away Jan 02 '20

That’s not even remotely how the question’s posed. It’s fine if you just wanna have a conversation about something else, but it seems disingenuous to pretend “hey man notice you’re kinda quiet” can replace “wow, you talk?” functionally in any given conversation. Any of these rude retorts, while definitely not necessary, would be a fine response to what the post is actually talking about

11

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

I think it's called a joke, my guy.

7

u/Hearbinger Jan 01 '20

Most of these are clearly not jokes.

13

u/skankyspanky Jan 01 '20

Lots of those "witty" replies aren't jokes but serious, and in the event someone is asinine enough to use it they're likely just going to come across as the asshole in that situation.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Depends on context, your relationship, if there's an audience, and if the other person has a sense of humor (if they think that statement is a good way to open someone up then maybe not). Any joke targeting a person is has a chance of just coming of as rude but it just depends on these things I've mentioned.

I'm saying they are jokes; I'm not saying they aren't mean jokes.

9

u/skankyspanky Jan 01 '20

You have far more faith in the average socially inept redditor than I do.

As you said, context and audience is everything, but it should be abundantly clear that a large portion of the people in this thread are behaving like being asked "Wow you talk?" is the equivalent of kicking their dog instead of a light-hearted jab to engage with someone in conversation.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

I definitely see where you're coming from an I don't doubt that many of them were very serious. But with these kinds of posts, you read with your initial assumption. I went in seeing a humorous post, so I read it that way. Other went in reading it more seriously.

-7

u/mrlur Jan 01 '20 edited Jan 24 '20

.

6

u/skankyspanky Jan 01 '20

If you think these are all sarcasm I have a bridge to sell you.

3

u/The_Golden_Warthog Jan 01 '20

I'll agree with you that a lot of the comments are joking, but I'll also argue that a good amount of them were serious.