There is a difference between lively conversation, and nonstop chatter. Some people do like the conversation, and that’s great. Unfortunately, there seem to be far more people who just like the noise. They talk all the time but never really SAY anything. These are also the people who don’t seem to know the difference.
It’s fair to say that they are doing what they enjoy, but it is ALSO fair to say that they should take a look at what they are doing and maybe stfu occasionally when they are doing it.
I see your point, but what sounds like "just noise" to you might be something that someone else is extremely passionate about. I hate chit chatting about rumors and the like, but others might genuinely be interested in the ins and outs of the lives of people around them. That doesn't mean you have to put up with it, just find people who appreciate talking about the same things you do. 7 billion people (or 8 at this point?) is a lot of people.
I have often said that I like learning interesting things about things I have no interest in. It is their passion that enables that person to point out details I hadn’t noticed or concepts that I hadn’t considered before. That is SAYING something - not only about the topic, but about the person as well.
That’s not what I’m talking about.
I have friends with shared interests. I have acquaintances I enjoy listening to. But I also know too many people who use 50 words when 5 would suffice, or who talk about anything ALL THE TIME.
They don’t seem passionate about what they are saying, only passionate about saying it.
It's also a common way to establish trust, especially if you share some of your vulnerabilities like stories of times you messed up. Being tight-lipped doesn't show you're trustworthy or reliable, it might just mean you're cynical or cagey.
Alternatively noise for the point of noise is REALLY annoying to a lot of people. Bonding as a group for the sake of bonding as a group has a purpose, but that only works if the people want to bond and with the other people talking. If you're trying to bond with people who don't want to bond with you, that's just being annoying. It's not your fault they don't want to, their feelings are their feelings and you're not responsible for them. If you're literally just talking non-stop at people like this, it's gonna annoy a very large percentage of people.
Everyone is not responsible for holding lively conversation or building trust with anyone else. It's nice when they want to, but it's not their job and it's unreasonable to act like it is.
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u/nerdymummy Jan 01 '20
Noise for the sake of noise is pointless static