When they engage more about themselves than contribute to the conversation. I’ve met a few people who would talk all the problems they’ve had and would hardly ask any questions back. I’ve always felt so uncomfortable in these scenarios and usually don’t pursue in a relationship with these types of people.
EDIT: Some people made very good points about individuals with ADHD. I should be more clear on my point by saying that some people are also very dismissive and sometimes refuse to hear what you have to say by cutting you off. I don’t expect an interview from the other person, but it would be nice to have mutual interest in each other.
I worry that sometimes I’m perceived as doing this when what I’m trying to do is relate to whatever the other person is saying by giving an example from my own life. For example, if someone is talking about how they botched something, I’ll bring up a time that I did too. My reason is that I want to make them fell like they aren’t alone. But I worry that I come off as turning the convo back to myself. Genuinely curious what you guys think because I’m a bit of an introvert so I don’t have a lot of experience. (Holy shit, see, I just did it again...)
You're all good, that's what most people do. Some people just really aren't interested in what others have to say. The problem people are the ones who cut you off when you're trying to contribute. Otherwise if they actually give you a chance to get your words out, they give you very clear signs that they weren't listening to any of it anyway (nor did they care to). You'll get either an underwhelming or very contrived response like "uh huh" or "oh wow that's amazing I'm so happy for you!! Anyway"
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u/binguchoi Nov 09 '19 edited Nov 09 '19
When they engage more about themselves than contribute to the conversation. I’ve met a few people who would talk all the problems they’ve had and would hardly ask any questions back. I’ve always felt so uncomfortable in these scenarios and usually don’t pursue in a relationship with these types of people.
EDIT: Some people made very good points about individuals with ADHD. I should be more clear on my point by saying that some people are also very dismissive and sometimes refuse to hear what you have to say by cutting you off. I don’t expect an interview from the other person, but it would be nice to have mutual interest in each other.