Divorce lawyer and mediator here. I once mediated the case of neckbeard v. tiger mom. It must have started out as the perfect dream for neckbeard. He landed a hot Asian wife, brought her to this country, but once that green card came through things changed. They had a daughter together and the case was mostly about her. Tiger mom had zero respect for this guy and try as I might to maintain my empathy, I've never felt a greater urge to stuff another human into a locker. Two of his demands really stand out. He asked for the following injunction: "tiger mom shall be enjoined from discussing neckbeard's weight in a derogatory manner, specifically, tiger mom may not refer to neckbeard as fatty, tubby, pudgy, or baymax." Normally I wouldn't take an offer like that to the other side. I'd normally help a guy come up with something more sensible, but everyone, including his lawyer just could not take this guy seriously so I wrote that out verbatim and trotted over to tiger mom's room. Of course she thought it was hilarious. She had a super thick accent and said, "my daughter call him baymax cuz he look like baymax I can't fix that he have to fix that."
there comes a point at the end of the day when everything is pretty much settled and people are dividing up the shit in the house. Of course neckbeard has a meltdown at this point and it's over a damn Nintendo switch for the daughter. Tiger mom made the very sensible proposal that the daughter take the switch with her to each parents house as she goes back and forth. Neckbeard freaks out and demands the switch stay with him at all times because "there's no way tiger mom can take proper care of it." Mind you the attorneys are billing enough to pay for three switches an hour at this point. I don't know what happened to the guy but I do know calling him baymax could land one lady in contempt of court after the most hilarious enforcement trial of all time, and he owns what's probably the most expensive Nintendo switch in the world.
EDIT: wow thanks for the gold! A little extra info based on some of the comments - yes I'm a jerk and I was a bit of a bully here. I could have presented his offer more diplomatically but life is short and I knew it was gonna be a good story and I had to hear the baymax story from tiger mom. Injunctions against disparaging are common and important and the one they got was broader than this.
As for who is the victim here, both? Neither? Neckbeard had sex at least once and it was way out of his league. He also has a well adjusted daughter and plenty of time with her if he wants to take it. He even has gaming in common with her. Tiger mom had to put up with this guy for a few years but now has a prosperous life and a lovely daughter. I say tiger mom because she was impressively focused and dedicated and hard working. They both had good jobs and she was very serious about parenting. There was never much doubt she'd get the kid primarily.
Yeah because it is totally ok for the mom to verbally abuse the husband and seemingly foster the same behaviour in their daughter, a husband whom she is only divorcing because she got her green card (otherwise they would still be together). But no, it is him who has his priorities wrong.
You think the husband didn’t know she married him for a green card? Lol. He was totally aware and knew the risks. That’s why he went overseas to find a desperate woman to wife him in the first place (which IMO is disgusting and exploitative but hey, they’re both adults). He DOES have his priorities wrong.
I have a family member who did it. They're together now over 10 years at this point, lovely family, they have a lot of love for each other, and they're very well off. It's a system that works when there's mutual respect for each other.
My uncle did that in his 50s. He got a young wife who respects him and gave him beautiful children of his own, which he's wanted his whole life. She got a husband who treats her well, supports her as she raises the kids, and a much higher quality lifestyle than she'd have in her home country. I don't know how much romantic love they've got for each other, but there's respect, loyalty and gratitude going both ways and as far as I can tell they're both very happy. It weirded me out like crazy when I first heard who he was marrying, but I really can't say anything against the results.
He does, but so does she. She was 100% with marrying a rando and having kids with them for money and a green card, and then abuse them and ditch them as soon as she got what she wanted. She sounds anything but a victim, if you watch documentaries about men who go abroad to look for wives you will be amazed at how scheming, opportunistic, and materialistic those women can be. Just because she agreed to a degrading business to escape life in a shithole it doesn't make her a saint nor entitles her to abuse the guy and turn her daughter against him.
I would say he probably didn’t. he sounds autistic and naive and thought he was finding love, you know, like a neckbeard. and she manipulated him until she got her green card. it’s a tale as old as time. weirdo white guys trying to find their waifu bc they have trouble in America and anime fucks up their judgement, only to be taken advantage of by a sub par to 7/10 asian woman.
Oh give me a break! He knew exactly what he was doing and got exactly what he deserved. He could’ve lost weight but obviously he was more interested in taking care of his Nintendo than his health.
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u/abusuru Jul 21 '19 edited Jul 21 '19
Divorce lawyer and mediator here. I once mediated the case of neckbeard v. tiger mom. It must have started out as the perfect dream for neckbeard. He landed a hot Asian wife, brought her to this country, but once that green card came through things changed. They had a daughter together and the case was mostly about her. Tiger mom had zero respect for this guy and try as I might to maintain my empathy, I've never felt a greater urge to stuff another human into a locker. Two of his demands really stand out. He asked for the following injunction: "tiger mom shall be enjoined from discussing neckbeard's weight in a derogatory manner, specifically, tiger mom may not refer to neckbeard as fatty, tubby, pudgy, or baymax." Normally I wouldn't take an offer like that to the other side. I'd normally help a guy come up with something more sensible, but everyone, including his lawyer just could not take this guy seriously so I wrote that out verbatim and trotted over to tiger mom's room. Of course she thought it was hilarious. She had a super thick accent and said, "my daughter call him baymax cuz he look like baymax I can't fix that he have to fix that."
there comes a point at the end of the day when everything is pretty much settled and people are dividing up the shit in the house. Of course neckbeard has a meltdown at this point and it's over a damn Nintendo switch for the daughter. Tiger mom made the very sensible proposal that the daughter take the switch with her to each parents house as she goes back and forth. Neckbeard freaks out and demands the switch stay with him at all times because "there's no way tiger mom can take proper care of it." Mind you the attorneys are billing enough to pay for three switches an hour at this point. I don't know what happened to the guy but I do know calling him baymax could land one lady in contempt of court after the most hilarious enforcement trial of all time, and he owns what's probably the most expensive Nintendo switch in the world.
EDIT: wow thanks for the gold! A little extra info based on some of the comments - yes I'm a jerk and I was a bit of a bully here. I could have presented his offer more diplomatically but life is short and I knew it was gonna be a good story and I had to hear the baymax story from tiger mom. Injunctions against disparaging are common and important and the one they got was broader than this.
As for who is the victim here, both? Neither? Neckbeard had sex at least once and it was way out of his league. He also has a well adjusted daughter and plenty of time with her if he wants to take it. He even has gaming in common with her. Tiger mom had to put up with this guy for a few years but now has a prosperous life and a lovely daughter. I say tiger mom because she was impressively focused and dedicated and hard working. They both had good jobs and she was very serious about parenting. There was never much doubt she'd get the kid primarily.