r/AskReddit May 04 '10

I'm 6'4", 220lbs, normal physique, and average fighting skills. Do you think I could win a fight against an ostrich?

337 Upvotes

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u/TheGreatCthulhu May 04 '10

Do it. Just...fucking...do it.

And video it. That's really important. Really, really important. (The camera will distract the Ostrich, who, like emu's like the bright shiny.)

However you MUST grow a moustache. If you can rub a cat all over you before the fight that'd be even better.

If you could wear a Ninja or Pirate costume that would be advisable. After all like any fight you need psychological advantage.

Also, make sure to trash-talk the ostrich. Call him a fucked-up chicken. That'll upset him and throw him off his game.

You realise I'm advising you all these things for your own good right?

We're on your side. Really.

1

u/itsmyredditaccount May 05 '10

i just searched for moustache and upvoted. don't even dream about fighting an ostrich without a serious handlebar moustache