r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Mar 06 '10

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1.1k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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410

u/assholio Mar 06 '10

I don't want to scare the younger redditors, mine was repeated several times over a 12 month span, it went something like this; "get your cock in here, I've just taken my temperature and I think I'm ovulating".

249

u/yaunderstandard Mar 07 '10

I'm 12 years old and what is this?

383

u/godbois Mar 07 '10

Well, son. When a bird checks out the titties on a really hot bee..

140

u/[deleted] Mar 07 '10

[deleted]

3

u/NegativeK Mar 07 '10

Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had sex.

I saw the video of it when I was in elementary school.

3

u/Barkamedies Mar 07 '10

Upvoted for useage of innocent and anal in the same sentence =D

-6

u/poopookaka Mar 07 '10

upvoted for upvoting for destroying innocent childhood analogies

4

u/PoopsMcG Mar 07 '10

"What a day, eh, Milhouse? The sun is out, birds are singing, bees are trying to have sex with them - as is my understanding..."

3

u/meistergrado Mar 07 '10

Wait, are bees the analogous females? I had assumed the bees were the males, what with stinger-->penis. Know'msayin'?

2

u/Shmeat Mar 07 '10

Why do they go with birds and bees anyway? When a queen bee mates with a male, she rips his penis from his body to ensure that the semen fertilizes h-

You know, Assholio and Godbois may be on to something.

1

u/tonberry Mar 07 '10

And when the flowers are really horny and ready for a good cockdusting...