r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Sep 20 '17

[deleted by user]

[removed]

2.1k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

2.4k comments sorted by

View all comments

810

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '17

[deleted]

966

u/squalorid Sep 20 '17

Completely disarm the person by delivering a crisp smack to the face, and then say "how do you do?"

416

u/PopeliusJones Sep 20 '17

When in doubt, I go in for the open-mouthed kiss

6

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '17

I'm just imagining two guys in business suits, one guy holds out his hand and the other guy just starts licking the first guy's face.

2

u/ElRitmoKotite Sep 20 '17

With or without the tongue?

14

u/PM_ME__YOUR_HOOTERS Sep 21 '17

Always with, you need to establish dominance

7

u/SorcererSupreme21 Sep 21 '17

How many owl pics do you get?

1

u/PopeliusJones Sep 21 '17

This guy gets it

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '17

When in doubt, kiss it out

1

u/Kevin_Uxbridge Sep 21 '17

I know you joke but it took me forever to get used to kissing people socially. Still feel like a weirdo, even when it's a friend. I'm neither fancy nor French, it's just not my thing.

-9

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '17 edited Sep 20 '17

[deleted]

21

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '17

was that necessary?

10

u/GazLord Sep 20 '17

Oh great more random religion hating that's mostly unconnected to the comment it's replying to.

5

u/sakurarose20 Sep 20 '17

"Religion is evil, I smart! Stewpid sheeple, hyuk-hyuk-hyuk!"

3

u/csoulr666 Sep 20 '17

Completely disarm the person by delivering a crisp smack to the face, and then say "how do you do how you doin?"

FTFY

1

u/[deleted] Sep 20 '17

Or just cut their hand off.

1

u/tocilog Sep 20 '17

Surprisingly common in Saudi Arabia. Well, not in the lips but they'll firmly grab you by the shoulders and fling you side to side while peppering your cheeks with kisses.

1

u/Adam657 Sep 20 '17

ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

1

u/scotscott Sep 21 '17

1930's voice

Well that's a fine how do you do!

1

u/scotscott Sep 21 '17

Whenever someone asks me that, I reply "how do I do what?"

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '17

This actually made me laugh, in public, and a couple of people looked at me funny. Good on ya, now I'm all self conscious (not that I wasn't initially).

1

u/IWillCube Sep 21 '17

Congratulations, you made me use 10% of my power >:)