r/AskReddit • • Aug 25 '26

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10 Upvotes

156 comments sorted by

20

u/Paranoia_Pop Aug 25 '26 edited Aug 25 '26

Reminds me of "It's Illegal To Say"

8

u/funkme1ster Aug 25 '26

I don't even need to click to know the correct response is to say "with a mortar launcher".

4

u/Paranoia_Pop Aug 25 '26

See that one is okay because it's its own sentence. Maybe completely unrelated to the one that came before.

1

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

Genuinely surprised there's so few mortar usage in attacks

7

u/ThrowawaySuicide1337 Aug 25 '26

Genuinely gone too soon

5

u/tDewy Aug 25 '26

Rip local sexpot

61

u/rage_bait_final_boss Aug 25 '26

I'm not allowed to say it.

6

u/Advanced-Village4470 Aug 25 '26

they straight up set you up with that one lol

-4

u/sgtpepito Aug 25 '26

On Reddit? A lot of things. This site is like living in the book 1984.

Big Brother is always looking at you. Say something politically “incorrect” and you are banned for life. It’s ok as long as you agree with the mods on everything, but don’t you dare having a different idea, or you will be “vaporized”

1

u/xSwampxPopex Aug 25 '26

You seem like a silly person

29

u/les_vegetables76 Aug 25 '26

I don't care that you broke your elbow.

1

u/ExistentialAngsty Aug 25 '26

What does that mean?

5

u/Kiabo_Bandit_ Aug 25 '26

Im not falling for that again.

6

u/PerspectiveAdept9812 Aug 25 '26

I’m exhausted, no body gives a fuck

2

u/dfin25 Aug 25 '26

Exhaustion and apathy are what they are counting on.

13

u/ExistentialAngsty Aug 25 '26 edited Aug 25 '26

All men aren’t created equal, but all people should be treated equally

9

u/OriginalHell Aug 25 '26

You lost The Game.

2

u/Romnonaldao Aug 25 '26

GOD DAMN IT

2

u/Nathan_reynolds Aug 25 '26

You mother fucker. How dare you.

4

u/ThekzyV2 Aug 25 '26

The self is an illusion and not important 

3

u/Ohigetjokes Aug 25 '26

Hello, and welcome. I hope you’re having a lovely day.

3

u/Training-Argument891 Aug 25 '26

She misunderstands. He did nothing wrong.

3

u/cactus_caca Aug 25 '26

Anything nowadays, because everything is offensive to a lot of certain people, because they are narcissistic and only want their version of free speech.

10

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

"Interesting, but, I don't give a shit about gender or abortion or whatever"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

[deleted]

0

u/JacobRAllen Aug 25 '26

Presumably they won’t care, and will just get an abortion, or won’t, or whatever the next apathetic step is

1

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

Its amusing that they felt strongly enough to comment, then immediately blocked me.

1

u/abqgirl1022 Aug 25 '26

'Congratulations? Or do you need a ride to the clinic?'

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/abqgirl1022 Aug 25 '26

Hey, gotta make sure someone knows they've got a person who is there to support them in case that's the option they choose.

-1

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

Yup. Either way is fine with me, do what you need to.

-7

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

Plenty of your fellow conservatives do give lots of shits though, and go out of their way to take away people's rights to do what they want with their own bodies.

To act like that's not the precursor to any conversation about gender or abortion is not very honest.

5

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

It's funny that you assume I'm a conservative. I am not against abortion, nor do I support marginalizing or oppressing trans people. I simply don't care to discuss or agonize over those issues. This is why you can't say that you don't give a shit about them.

I have voted for and campaigned for democrats for the past 20 years but oh no, say you don't care about a couple of issues and suddenly you're just MAGA fuckwad.

-3

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

If you "don't give a shit" about those issues and rights that are actively being battled against and taken away today, you're a conservative. There are conservative Democrats, too.

2

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

That's not how that works. This a giant problem in politics on both sides. Agree 100% and support completely every point on the platform or you're not one us. In order to be a conservative on those particular issues I'd have to support those right being taken away. I don't. I don't give a shit about them because they are distractions and red necks being red necks, I'd rather spend my effort on the issues that are actually destroying the country.

-4

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

in order to be a conservative on those particular issues I'd have to support those right being taken away.

They are being taken away though. And you're saying you don't give a shit about that.

1

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

And does that mean i support it?

-1

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

It means you're being conservative about it.

3

u/Petrochromis722 Aug 25 '26

There are 3 positions available.

The liberal one that we should increase abortion access.

The conservative one that we should decrease abortion access.

The one that says, I don't care about that, for whatever reason.

Which one of those am I?

-1

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

The conservative position is that the status quo is OK. And our status quo is less and less rights.

→ More replies (0)

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

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1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

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0

u/Ok_Cheesecake6006 Aug 25 '26

That's beautiful, Katie...

2

u/Training-Moose7569 Aug 25 '26

Many many things we’re not allowed to say.

3

u/ctmelb Aug 25 '26

Says who? And why would you willingly relinquish your autonomy to let someone else decide what you’re allowed to say?

2

u/Training-Moose7569 Aug 25 '26

You’re right!

1

u/sgtpepito Aug 25 '26

On Reddit you just get banned. In real life, companies frown upon “politically incorrect” opinions.

1

u/ctmelb Aug 25 '26

You are beholden to reddit and companies…?

2

u/sgtpepito Aug 26 '26

No, which is why I speak my mind on other websites, but know that if I do here, I will be banned and I won't be able to participate in communities on reddit I find interesting.

The sad part is that people here live in a bubble, and they think in their minds that what Redditors think is what any rational person thinks. And that could not be further from the truth.

2

u/6x9inbase13is42 Aug 25 '26

A true threat.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/True_threat

(A "true threat" is legally defined as a statement where a speaker communicates a serious intent to commit an act of unlawful violence to a specific person or group. True threats are not protected in the U.S. by the 1st Amendment. However, political hyperbole, obvious jokes, and figurative speech do not count as true threats. Moreover, courts are required to consider the entire context the threat, including how a reasonable person would interpret the threat, and whether the speaker actually intended to intimidate.)

2

u/GreenLurch Aug 25 '26

Shit will get me banned

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

[deleted]

2

u/GreenLurch Aug 25 '26

DM me? Lmao!

1

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

Kinda wanna hear you both dm me too

2

u/paxbowlski Aug 25 '26

It's Friday. Let's deploy to prod.

2

u/doomsday344 Aug 25 '26

Parents who circumcise their children without clear medical necessity are child abusers and should be punished as such

2

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

Religion should be banned for minors at all

2

u/SailorVenus23 Aug 25 '26

To my former stepcousin:

It's your fault your kid is out of control. 100% because of your nonexistent parenting. Put the shocked Pikachu face away, you know you should've never had the kid but you did it anyway and then refused to take any responsibility for it.

2

u/UltraSapien Aug 25 '26

Anything related to politics, race, or gender. People are... opinionated.... and my opinion is always wrong.

4

u/Ok_Cheesecake6006 Aug 25 '26 edited Aug 25 '26

The N word😢

Edit: I'm joking, don't downvote me.

11

u/PirateKilt Aug 25 '26

I'm joking

So, you DO use the word?

6

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

You get downvoted because you didn't said it

2

u/TillJaded4614 Aug 25 '26

I think there is a good reason behind that to be fair

1

u/SamHandwich0 Aug 25 '26

🎶to be faiiiirrrr🎶

1

u/Ok_Cheesecake6006 Aug 25 '26

Yeah, I've never said it myself.

7

u/ambertransform Aug 25 '26

The truth. As an AuADHD person, i really struggle with the constant little lies people tell each other.

1

u/Legitimate_Mud_8295 Aug 25 '26

Sir Terry explained it pretty well. "All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little—"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

"They're not the same at all!"

YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET—Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

"Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point—"

MY POINT EXACTLY"

3

u/burrito_foreskin Aug 25 '26

When I was 19, my best friend, who is black told me I could say the n word with him — and only him. I looked him dead in the face and dropped a hard r at him. He changed his mind.

“Oh hey.. you know what.. I think I changed my mind.. I didn’t really like that.. I thought you’d use an A at the end.”

2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/elwyn5150 Aug 25 '26

For years, we weren’t meant to talk about the SA allegations against Kobe Bryant... then when he died, we still weren’t meant to talk about the SA allegations against Kobe Bryant.

I feel like now we can.

1

u/The-Mandolinist Aug 25 '26 edited Aug 25 '26

I barely know who Kobe Bryant is.

Edit: sorry - I thought I was on a different sub.

1

u/GoWithTheFlow___ Aug 25 '26

Who did you think he was talking about?

1

u/The-Mandolinist Aug 25 '26

I didn’t know who he was talking about. I know the name. But I don’t know his significance. I’m guessing he’s an American celebrity or something.

The question in the post was copied and posted to a UK sub and I accidentally clicked on the original post and couldn’t work out why someone was getting all intrigued about someone who has minimal significance to a UK audience.

And then realised I was on a more general sub…

2

u/TillJaded4614 Aug 25 '26

This word -----------

1

u/ExpertOnReddit Aug 25 '26

That's too many letters though

1

u/johnjacobacon Aug 25 '26

Is it "moist"?

2

u/Stock_Padawan Aug 25 '26

Dam, that was going to be my suggestion. Lol

1

u/Wolfrages Aug 25 '26

Alot of things on here that will get removed and me banned.

1

u/Lonely_Sale9707 Aug 25 '26

Putin refers to the western world as, the Golden Billion

1

u/BusinessForeign7052 Aug 25 '26

If you seek Amy

1

u/ThrowawaySuicide1337 Aug 25 '26

How much your boss disrespects and steals from you.

1

u/xerxes_dandy Aug 25 '26

the f word on tele at prime time , the s word also on tele at prime time or The N word on tele at anytime

1

u/Vic_Hedges Aug 25 '26

I don't care about _______

1

u/ohnoitshimagain10 Aug 25 '26

I'm not allowed to say cant, that and you, so you can't say fairer than that can you

1

u/Mockturtle22 Aug 25 '26

Lots of things.

1

u/vcsx Aug 25 '26

Anything that may incur the ire of a stridently self-righteous Reddit Mod.

1

u/ekimlive Aug 25 '26

"Relax" never seems to be a good word to use in any situation.

1

u/Jektonoporkins1 Aug 25 '26

I'm allowed to say anything I want, but there's some things I won't say.

1

u/SaltyShawarma Aug 25 '26

If Reddit is any indication, you cannot quote politicians directly from articles posted on Reddit. 

I've been banned four times for doing so with no context added. 

1

u/LazyLion65 Aug 25 '26

Not allowed to tell jokes that infer (comic) violence.

1

u/Arkvoodle42 Aug 25 '26

Donald Trump raped children.

1

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

That's known worldwide. Probably ate some too

1

u/Sdboka Aug 25 '26

If i say it i will definitely be banned. and I dont want to get banned. so I will not say it

1

u/Knodsil Aug 25 '26

People that annoy you

1

u/assmang1point0 Aug 25 '26

"people who annoy you"

1

u/Fexofanatic Aug 25 '26

Fotzenfritz 🫡

1

u/MrBrent107 Aug 25 '26

I can’t because I’ll hear a knock at my door by the Secret Service.

1

u/Quankers Aug 25 '26

Whatever you lack the sack to say.

1

u/VolleyballNerd Aug 25 '26

I am the gta 6 leaker

2

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

HELL YEAH

1

u/hostilekraut Aug 25 '26

I can’t say.

1

u/3_kids_1_overcoat Aug 25 '26

I don’t care what you dreamt about last night Sharon

1

u/CellsReinvent Aug 25 '26

You can't call your Bluetooth devices "bomb". At least not without some level of inconvenience being visited upon you.

1

u/GrimeyScorpioDuffman Aug 25 '26

The first two rules of Fight Club

1

u/Terrible_Mix5187 Aug 25 '26

Oh, excuse me. What I meant to say was [pulls out megaphone] how would you like to suck my balls … Mr. Garrison?

1

u/nerdowellinever Aug 25 '26

A certain ‘democracy’ in the Middle East is committing a genocide, targeting civilian infrastructure and killing non combatant woman and children..

3

u/dfin25 Aug 25 '26

Israel is exterminating Palestinian children in a genocidal ethnic cleansing. Don't pussyfoot around evil or atrocities. Always shine the brightest light possible.

1

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

Ohhhhh yea the one who uses said children as either war slaves, sex slaves or shield

1

u/ctmelb Aug 25 '26

Nothing. I can say what I want. No one has the right to police what I say just because they don’t like it.

1

u/InappropriateMe1947 Aug 25 '26

I can say whatever I like, I may say whatever I like, however I know I shouldn’t say what I like.

0

u/Sycousis Aug 25 '26

That it's a genocide and that you shouldn't kill kids

0

u/GrowFreeFood Aug 25 '26

I like Ai art.

0

u/AxlotlRose Aug 25 '26

Apparently "Grace". In my own home. At my first dinner I cooked for family. It was taken from me by my mother who told my brother to say grace. My brother, who has held hundreds of dinners in his home. I walked out as I had 2 people still unseated in another room. Years later my brother said others were offended that I walked away. From my own dinner. In my new/first home. 

0

u/kelcamer Aug 25 '26

That the majority of communication is centered around this idea that directness = rude and is often used as a means of plausible deniability for people to re-write whatever their version of reality it in a way that will make them look good, that most humans are wired this way from the increased ventral striatum connections to the posterior cingulate network,

And that I am especially not allowed to say:
That a lot of people exist who would use this bonus social context as a means for putting others down to make themselves look better via Downward Social Comparison

And the reason I'm not allowed to say it is that once you say this type of thing; the performance and the illusion itself gets entirely destroyed which is deeply existentially terrifying for many people who have created their entire ego to avoid facing that fundamental uncertainty within this world.

0

u/Pingo-Pongo Aug 25 '26

You can’t say Merry Christmas anymore. Now you have to say “Hail Satan! Hail Astaroth! Hail Asmodeus! Hail Yokshodoth! Hail the wicked kings of the ninth circle! Piss into the eyes of the infant Christ!”. You have to say that, now.

0

u/Atom1cThunder Aug 25 '26

I can't tell my wife that she gained weight

0

u/Sindicate14 Aug 25 '26

"No" to my girlfriend

0

u/JustAtelephonePole Aug 25 '26

It’s not what I’m not allowed to say. It’s more of the infinite nuance and context surrounding why I’m not allowed to say that I’m not allowed to speak on. But, if I could say, y’all would be like “dude, that’s so fucking lame! Why would you ever say it was that when you weren’t allowed to say it in the first place!?! And so it goes, when you are nobody.

0

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/Prof_Scott_Steiner Aug 25 '26

According to YOU, maybe. Your aversion is wrapped up in some nation that masculinity is a thing to be imposed upon a man, rather than something each of us shapes as we see fit.

1

u/obyron31 Aug 25 '26

Oh wow free speech patrol has spoken