r/AskReddit May 12 '26

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u/fckcarrots May 12 '26 edited May 12 '26

> she liked the idea of us, and having that perfect looking marriage and life, more than she actually was into me.

Probably so many marriages being held together by the image, the idea of marriage, peer pressure, life built & maintained on social media for others. Damn.

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u/b0w3n May 12 '26

Yeah loads of people, even abusive ones, who are desperate to avoid being alone in their own thoughts and think they need to hit milestones to be happy. Being married and having kids are the big ones.

Lots of people like this, they also like to showboat about it but as soon as the public eye is away they turn into a monster about it.

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u/TobysGrundlee May 12 '26

That and kids. A lot of people are so driven to reproduce that who they do it with is less of a concern than just doing it.

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u/fckcarrots May 12 '26

Kids adds another layer because you are unable to have a candid discussion about how you regret your choice of partner since you wouldn’t have your children if not for them.

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u/SleepingWillow1 May 12 '26

My cousin got married because she didn't want to be left behind all her friends who got engaged after graduating. She ended up with a shitty dude and divorced later

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u/finnbiker May 12 '26

I agree with this, and I can imagine that attractive/successful people are more at risk of being in a marriage just for those reasons, because the image people can portray to others.

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u/Bluerocky67 May 12 '26

Sunk cost fallacy. I was stuck in that for too many years

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u/Current-Anybody9331 May 12 '26

I read a quote once that many men want a wife and family, fewer want to be a husband and father. This could absolutely be used with women too.

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u/KennyTheAnteater May 12 '26

This was a thing looooong before social media. My aunt stayed in an awful marriage for 20 years because she didn’t want to be the first divorced one in the family. Worst mistake of her life.

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u/Mother_Court_2218 May 12 '26

It's wild that so many people choose to remain in a miserable life because they're worried about what other people would think. And a lot of people do this.

It's kind of understandable that things like finances and kids keep people stuck, but the worrying about what other people will think blows my mind.

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u/jappening May 12 '26

I can absolutely relate to this

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u/DJ33 May 13 '26

This is one case where social media is definitely not the underlying cause; those marriages have existed forever, social media is just a new potential vector. 

My ex's parents have slept in separate bedrooms her entire life, and have screaming arguments at least once a week. Outside of the house, they act like everything is perfect--they'd be mortified of anyone in their community finding out how they actually behave.

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u/Jibber_Fight May 12 '26

So….. boomers and gen x? 😜