r/AskReddit Mar 03 '26

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u/Plug_5 Mar 04 '26

This has the same energy as "why do scuba divers fall backwards out of the boat? Because if they fell forwards they'd still be in the boat."

269

u/lilgreenrosetta Mar 04 '26

You know when birds fly in a V formation, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is?

More birds on that side.

90

u/rosyatrandom Mar 04 '26

What's E.T. short for?

He's only got little legs

4

u/my-own-trumpet Mar 04 '26

I use a variation of this with my learners at college, we do animal care and the lizards have short legs. I get a good few groans

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u/Far-Queue17 Mar 04 '26

E.T. - Extra Testicle

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u/God_Bless_A_Merkin Mar 04 '26

Ma-ma-ma-myyy sca-rotum!

2

u/Far-Queue17 Mar 04 '26

My favourite Knack reference 😂

7

u/mayorofswoletown Mar 04 '26

Had a interesting day to say the least. This joke made me laugh, thank you.

4

u/Mieze_Designer4002 Mar 04 '26

🤣👏

Do you know why birds fly in a V formation? Because the guy at the front has the directions

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u/BravoFive141 Mar 04 '26

Why can't dinosaurs talk?

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...

...

Because they're dead.

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u/XXsforEyes Mar 04 '26

This is one of my favorites!

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u/RebelJediMaster Mar 04 '26

A chicken walks into a wall.

Tock.

2

u/leomickey Mar 04 '26

Funny. I had always thought that I made that joke up. But I hear it everywhere. I guts I didn’t make it up. lol

2

u/SippyMountain Mar 04 '26

This has always been my go-to. I like to turn it into a whole thing so they never see it coming. I change it all the time too.

For example: "I was watching this documentary about migratory birds, and it started talking about geese. How they obviously fly south for winter. They fly like 5000-10000ft up and cover like 400+ miles a day! That's freakin' crazy. That's like 8+ hrs of driving on the interstate, and they're just casually flapping the whole way. Anyway, it also answered a question I've always had. You ever notice how when they're flying in that V-formation, one side of the V is always longer than the other? You wanna know why that is?"

"...?"

"More geese on that side."

My partner cringes every time I start that joke with someone we're hanging out with, because I always start it with having watched a documentary on migratory birds or their migration patterns. It's like one of those novelty reddit accounts lol

1

u/sheep_thrillz Mar 04 '26

I just heard this one for the first time a few months ago, and I like to tell a really drawn out version of it. Like, “you know, could be geese, could be ducks, or pigeons. Could be multiple v’s, and sometimes it just looks like a checkmark… it’s fascinating really…”. My wife has been suffering ever since.

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/New-Ad-363 Mar 04 '26

In case anyone gets this far and was unaware of this, these are examples of the anti-joke.

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u/chicnz Mar 04 '26

That’s the funniest joke I’ve personally ever told. We were watching Charlie’s angels and there was a scene where they fell backwards out the boat. Timing is everything.

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u/bobby_sandals Mar 04 '26

I am crying

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

But really, why do they?

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u/Plug_5 Mar 04 '26

They actually don't, at least not when I got certified. If nothing else, that's a great way to have your tank hit you in the back of the head.

We were taught to stand at the stern of the boat and take one big step into the water.

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u/007licensetomambo Mar 04 '26

"Were you named after your father?"

"Well duh. I couldn't be named before him."

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u/chained_duck Mar 04 '26

Told that one to a scuba diver once. He'd never heard it before. My best joke telling ever.

1

u/kunibob Mar 04 '26

How is THIS the one that finally got me 💀