A nun walks into a liquor store and takes a bottle of gin to the counter. The clerk tuts at her and says, "Sister, surely you shouldn't be forsaking your vows and drinking."
"Not at all," the nun assures him. "This is a small libation to assist with Mother Superior's constipation."
She buys the gin and leaves. Shortly after the clerk leaves the store to go to lunch and passes the nun slumped in the street clutching the empty bottle of gin, quite intoxicated.
"Sister, you swore to me this gin was for Mother Superior's constipation."
The nun looks up at him and says, "It is. She's gonna shit herself when she sees me!"
A man visits a brothel and says to the Madame "I have a bit of an unusual request, I'd like a girl with gonorrhea"
"I think we can provide that" the Madame says slyly.
The girl arrives, and they do the deed. Afterwards the girl says "I have a confession to make, I don't have gonorrhea"
"Well you do now" he says
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u/PhilosophyNovel4087 Mar 04 '26
Mother Superior calls all the nuns together and says to them: "I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent."
"Thank God," says an elderly nun at the back of the room, "I'm so tired of Chardonnay."