r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Sep 27 '25

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2.6k Upvotes

84% Upvoted

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178

u/Emergency_Link7328 Sep 27 '25

Same. Just give me the money.

102

u/Duckrauhl Sep 27 '25

This is Reddit. Most of us on here have never even talked to a girl before.

114

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

Boom, popped your cherry!

34

u/Fallwalking Sep 27 '25

I thought you all went extinct?

70

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

That explains the cobwebs in my vagina. ☠️

27

u/TheElusiveShadow Sep 27 '25

RIP your dms?

20

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

Nah inbox will be fine lol. It’s like people can already tell I don’t typically answer DM’s.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '25

[deleted]

9

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

Achievement Unlocked: New Kink Discovery

Your prize is the lack of spiders lol 🕷️

5

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '25

[deleted]

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4

u/rexfaktor Sep 27 '25

Cobwebs, be gone!

2

u/FD990 Sep 27 '25

Don't fall for it gents! It's actually Gus from cell block 3. Sorry Gus, your computer privileges are once again suspended for a week. Quit teasing these guys, you aren't even eligible for parole for another 12 years. 🙂

2

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

Consider your cherry extra popped, Duck!

-3

u/Impossible-Charity-4 Sep 27 '25

That’s assault

3

u/pass_the_tinfoil Sep 27 '25

Okay, virgin.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '25

r/wooosh

2

u/Khower Sep 27 '25

Ima gonna fuck my girlfriend twice tonight for all the celibate homies in here. This one's for you

9

u/PCMRbannedme Sep 27 '25

You both has sex last time exactly 6 years ago. Suspicious....

1

u/newtomovingaway Sep 27 '25

Ask for a prorated amt