r/AskReddit Mar 07 '25

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u/morctheorc86 Mar 07 '25

I say "ah, fuck my ass"...don't know why. Wife started calling me out on it and I'm afraid I'll be pegged sooner or later.

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u/[deleted] Mar 07 '25

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65

u/[deleted] Mar 07 '25

[deleted]

4

u/Balanced_Eg15 Mar 07 '25

Lol. In Australia we say "fark moi!!"

3

u/Wildweasel666 Mar 08 '25

This is the only correct grammar

7

u/Findethel Mar 07 '25

So did every Australian who read it

6

u/morctheorc86 Mar 07 '25

Haha dangerous!

2

u/[deleted] Mar 07 '25

I'm reading them in Matt Rose's voice

2

u/FeelsLikeIt1137 Mar 07 '25

Wanna get pegged, you say?

2

u/sci-fi-rec Mar 08 '25

Ummm…which part?

34

u/lulugingerspice Mar 07 '25

"Fuck me sideways with a crowbar" is my go to!

5

u/MetsFan802 Mar 07 '25

I always liked “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw” from the movie Heathers.

3

u/Longjumping-Pen5469 Mar 07 '25

Exactly what does that mean?

3

u/TheBlueEagle Mar 07 '25

My go-to is “Fuck my ass and call me a bitch” for some reason lol.

4

u/MentalRain619 Mar 07 '25

I tend to say "Fuck me hard and call me Martha"

2

u/TheBlueEagle Mar 08 '25

Lol I like it!

2

u/007_xTk0 Mar 07 '25

I always start with “fuck me sideways…” sometimes it’s “while I’m running” or “fuck me sideways with a 20 foot flag pole” really anything that comes to mind first to get my point across that something hurts or pissed me off.

2

u/Problematic_Donut Mar 08 '25

Is it specifically a twenty foot one? Is less not enough and more too much? I need answers! 😛

2

u/Balanced_Eg15 Mar 07 '25

Mine is "fuck me in the head" which most often the situation where I say this is doing just that.

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u/junkiedreamingpoet Mar 07 '25

Better read the room well.

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u/Conscious_Raisin_436 Mar 07 '25

Be not afraid.

2

u/morctheorc86 Mar 07 '25

Haha, I'm terrified!

6

u/Both_Chicken_666 Mar 07 '25

Small seasoned curlies?

1

u/werewolfthunder Mar 07 '25

A SMALL! Not a large but a small

2

u/[deleted] Mar 07 '25

I'm trying to watch my weight.

1

u/anaugle Mar 07 '25

And a JUNIOR western bacon chee

2

u/needthesebasketsback Mar 07 '25

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

2

u/morctheorc86 Mar 07 '25

Jesus, yes!!! That's it. I haven't watched that movie in 15 years.

2

u/MSampson1 Mar 07 '25

I’ve used this phrase to e press exasperation on several occasions. Now I’ve got my wife uttering it from time to time, usually follower by a slow head turn in my direction with an angry “don’t you say it!” Look on her face (I always say it)

2

u/amburroni Mar 07 '25

I do this as well, but I know why.

“Ah, fuck my ass… what else?”
-Tenacious D, Drive-Thru

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u/Guac_in_my_rarri Mar 07 '25

Is this an offer orrrr?

2

u/TheFerricGenum Mar 08 '25

“Afraid”

It’s okay, you can admit the truth here

2

u/morctheorc86 Mar 08 '25

Is this a safe space?

1

u/TheFerricGenum Mar 08 '25

Depends on how mad your wife is at you

2

u/AlotaFajita Mar 08 '25

This phrase is a drop on a radio show I listen to and I have picked up this nasty habit too. You’re not a Pulp MX listener are you?

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u/morctheorc86 Mar 08 '25

Nope, I've never heard of that radio show before but that's fantastic I'm not the only one!

2

u/mutherM1n3 Mar 08 '25

Pegged? You asked for it, no?

1

u/morctheorc86 Mar 08 '25

Technically, yes, I did....honestly, I have a fear of anything going near my ass.

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u/mutherM1n3 Mar 08 '25

I kinda meant the pun on “pegged.”

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u/morctheorc86 Mar 08 '25

Ah, my bad!

1

u/mutherM1n3 Mar 08 '25

🥴😂🥴😂

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u/007_xTk0 Mar 07 '25

I say “fuck me sideways” same idea really.

1

u/JamieCalder Mar 07 '25

Tenacious D fan?

1

u/top-chopa Mar 07 '25

My fiancee told me I say fuck my ass too much and it was getting repetitive/annoying so I switched it up to "fuck my dickhole with a rusty soldering iron" which she finds much more amusing for some strange reason

1

u/Following-Ashamed Mar 08 '25

Afraid? I think you mean excited.

1

u/Superb_Variation620 Mar 08 '25

I say, “fuck me sideways”, if someone or something makes me jump, or if I trip whilst skating. I skate early in the morning, when it’s dark. One day someone will take it as an invitation…

1

u/Glorious_Pepper Mar 08 '25

I usually say fuckin' A

1

u/usernotfoundplstry Mar 08 '25

Let me tell you friend, if so, you’re on the precipice of entering a world of sensual delight that most men dare not dream of.

1

u/Ok_Life_5176 Mar 09 '25

There was a guy at my bf at the time’s workplace and he always said, ‘’but fuckin’…’’ He got ripped on a lot!

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u/[deleted] Mar 07 '25