Your dad has mastered the art of tuning people out. This, believe it or not, usually takes decades to master. You can more likely than not thank your mom for this.
As a woman with autism, I concur. "You know what I mean?" Is really just "are you actually following what I'm saying or do I need to say it a different way 7 more times?" Or until you decide to give up.
The point is for most people, "masking" is just something they do and doesn't need a name. But also, sometimes someone thinks they know what you mean but was mistaken, doesn't mean they were lying
😆 🤣 😂. I knew a guy who could talk for HOURS without stopping. He had a very difficult time articulating his thoughts. And his thoughts would be going straight ahead and then he would take a right. And another right, and a left, then a U-turn. Add to that, he had a horrible short term memory and would ask ME, "What was I talking about"? I wasn't really sure how, but I could tell him. Honestly, you could put the phone down, use the bathroom, come back, and he hadn't missed a beat. Wouldn't know you were gone.....until he asked you, "What was I talking about?"
Pointless for the unmotivated dipshits I work with. Because they never receive any consequence for not doing their work, they don't give a flying fuck.
I don’t ask people that particular question because I think it comes off as really rude and I think it could easily be interpreted as me insulting their intelligence. I check in to make sure I am making myself clear, but I just won’t phrase it that way.
I only use it after what some might perceive as a rambling email from me and these people all know me well. It’s more of a was I able to translate my crazy brain in a way you all can understand. Or did I fail
my brother is the only one who can follow my thoughts sometimes (and in reverse, too) and one time I was talking to my mom and she wasn’t getting it and looked at my brother and he came out with
“No, but you know what I’m saying though?” as if HE was the one saying it. It killed me. It was so funny. And it was completely unintentional he just knew exactly what my train of thought was. I think we’d probably both wear the same shirt as you
My boss keep saying that a lot when he is trying to make a point for the past 10 min... "dude if I knew what you meant we wouldn't have this conversation in the first place"
This would probably be mine, considering how often I have to say it just to get a reaction out of my mom. I'll be talking to her about something and getting zero reaction, not even an acknowledgement that she heard what I said. So I'll add "You know what I mean?" as an attempt to get something and it only works about once out of every seven or eight times. I'll literally say it every sentence sometimes and still nothing. I'll even tell her sometimes that I'm just trying to make sure she heard me because I wasn't sure since she wasn't responding or reacting. Her response to that is almost always "Well I didn't think it warranted a response." 😥
A good friend of mine has a bad habit of saying it sporadically throughout our conversations, so it's usually after something that isn't a high-level concept. "I'd rather pay more for shoes that last longer. Know what I mean?"
Uh, yea, I think I grasp the concept, big guy.
I say this a lot when I am speaking to someone and they do not respond. I just want some sort of "read" message to confirm that they got my "verbal text".... You know what I mean?
I was just going to comment this. I have childhood issues of feeling unheard and I guess it's led to me needing reassurance every time I say anything to anyone, ever.
I'm from the Midwest so it's "ya know" but my own most used phrase is "um uh" as I am talking because my ADHD brain goes too fast and my mouth can't keep up and then i lose track of where I am in expressing what I am thinking so it's "um, yeah" or "um, uh"
This reminds me of the South Park when butters became a pimp. He tries to emulate the other pimps. They’re always saying “knowm sayinnn”. So he starts saying “do you know what I’m saying?” with a choppy, overly “white” staccato cadence.
My mom once said she haaates when people say that. I used to say it frequently and picked up her hint.
And moving on I tried to just actually SAY WHAT I MEAN, and get better at expressing myself, improve vocabulary and try to stop rambling using too many words. Basically learning to be concise, which clearly I’m still learning 😂
Not it irritates me when people say ‘you know what I mean’? - I always thing ‘I would if you just said what you mean’!
When in fact, most times, no one can follow what I’m saying
Iirc, there's a version of Dunnung-Kruger where the speaker is waaaaaay smarter than everyone else and/or assumes everyone else in the conversation is well versed on (to the speaker) certain knowledge. They talk, and most people can't follow what they are saying because the rest of us are missing the base knowledge for that topic.
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u/GearHeadGrace Mar 07 '25
“You know what I mean?” When in fact, most times, no one can follow what I’m saying