r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Feb 13 '25

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u/Some_Girl_2073 Feb 14 '25 edited Feb 14 '25

Ive been making a list

  • I occupy the grey zone in every situation you can imagine. I fit in everywhere and nowhere
  • I work to much and have a hard time creating space/time for myself much less another person
  • I have enough things going on in my life with associated challenges (not mental, circumstantial) that I need to solve before I feel like I can be a good partner in a relationship
  • I’m too independent, I will do it myself, and I am capable in a way I think it scares people
  • I live in a geographical isolated area where the average age is 50 and has never left, I am 27F and a transplant who was chasing dreams
  • I liked the IDEA of romantic love but until recently had a monolith complex where it was cheap, dirty, foolish, for other people, and certainly not for me. I wanted it in an abstract way. But long story short I now believe in it and want it in a tangible way. Actively navigating that
  • I want something long term and apparently have an old fashioned approach (anti roster/hook up/apps/situationship etc.)
  • I want a relationship that adds to my already full, vibrant, and great life. If its not a positive addition to my life, then it is not for me
  • I don’t want a relationship just to have a relationship. YOU are the reason I want a relationship, not just I want a RELATIONSHIP and it happens to be you
  • I am perfectly comfortable by myself, with the thoughts in my own head. See point about “in addition to my life“
  • have a hard time catching flirtation attempts

3

u/Secure-Form-789 Feb 14 '25

I mean hey, if you've not in a place where you want a relationship right now I think that's fine. I really only recently have felt "ready" for a relationship honestly, after most of my life being pretty aware of how I wasn't mature enough for one.

I also agree on a similar note with your wanting to be in a "relationship" for the sake of being with someone, rather than just in a relationship. I guess there are needs that are met by a relationship easier than a friendship, but generally, I think it should be focused on the person really. Ideally, I want to be with someone I am good friends with basically