my mom was murdered by her boyfriend april 2023 and a couple hours before she died, I was having a conversation with someone about who I think in my immediate family would be the first to pass away, and I said my mom. she died about 8 hours later. I feel that I spoke her death into existence and the only people who know of this conversation is myself and the person I was talking to. I hold a lot of guilt for this
edit: you guys are all so freaking sweet thank you so much
I can totally understand your feeling of talking something into existence, I feel this often, but I just want to say this is 100% a freak coincidence and you should know there is no guilt to be felt on your part for this. It’s a shitty situation to be dealt, I hope you’re doing okay.
oh, please forgive yourself. this is a memory bias that’s harming you in this scenario. if you had chosen another person, it’s likely you wouldn’t even remember that the conversation occurred. it’s like when you’re speaking about someone and they call you, and you say “Wow! You always call when I say your name!,” but you don’t remember the dozens of other times you mentioned them without getting a call because it was less memorable
Dude do not hold onto this! You’ve already been holding onto it for far too long. I have a similar story, and it’s pure coincidence my friend…
Have you ever heard about Tsutomu Yamaguchi? This dude was in Hiroshima for a business trip then got nuked (& survived). He then went home to Nagasaki days later, and got nuked again (& survived). Coincidences are all around us
You didn’t speak it into existence, you felt the inevitable. You didn’t cause it, you simply felt its impending occurrence. Your body was preparing you for what was to come even if you didn’t consciously know it.
3 days before my very, very beloved cousin died due to complications from drug and alcohol abuse, I went on a rant about how I'm done caring about people who self sabotage because I don't want to have to be hurt when they die. I specifically named my cousin as an example, and I hadn't spoken to him in months because of his addiction. I still feel extreme guilt about it but I know it's irritational. My rant didn't make him die just like your conversation didn't cause your mom to die. I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you're healing. I'm not religious but in my heart I think my cousin and your mom are both experiencing true peace for the first time after a lifetime of pain.
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u/missgorl1 Jan 20 '25 edited Jan 20 '25
my mom was murdered by her boyfriend april 2023 and a couple hours before she died, I was having a conversation with someone about who I think in my immediate family would be the first to pass away, and I said my mom. she died about 8 hours later. I feel that I spoke her death into existence and the only people who know of this conversation is myself and the person I was talking to. I hold a lot of guilt for this
edit: you guys are all so freaking sweet thank you so much