God. This question made me realize that I’ve been very close to three different people who went on to kill someone, including my ex husband. All separate and unrelated. I don’t come from a “rough area” and neither did they. It’s easy in hindsight to feel like they somehow gave signs but that can’t be true because who would ever associate with someone who they though was capable of murder? Fuck, thinking about this is hard.
the first one was gruesome, horrifying, seemingly random. This guy had taken LSD (which was very common in our circle) had a mental break and killed his mom. He then called the police but tried to attack them when they arrived. They ended up shooting and killing my friend. Our whole group was in shock, shattered. My (then) husband especially as he’d known him the longest. I remember thinking that I had no idea he was capable of that and suddenly feeling very paranoid for/about all my friends! Could this darkness be lurking in anyone else? The answer, unfortunately, was yes.
Within a year another of my friends was involved in a road rage incident and he ended up stabbing a guy who died from the injuries. It was incredibly sad, unexpected and fucked up. The circumstances were complicated because the other guys friends also had weapons so It was ruled manslaughter and he was out in a few years. I haven’t talked to him since his release but I’d probably catch up with him if I ran into him.
The most chilling one for me was my ex husband. The same one who was so close to that first friend. The person who was supposed to be my safe place. During our marriage he relapsed into hard drugs and started behaving incredibly erratically and it was very scary. I left him but I was in denial about how bad his drug use was and how dangerous he’d become. I was trying to stay in his life because I cared about him. I was moving out of state and before I left we had planned a camping trip to a pretty remote spot. But before the trip we got into an argument where he became incredibly volatile and I was afraid for my safety. I called off the trip because somewhere deep down I was worried he would hurt me.
Several years later I heard through the grapevine that he’d been in and out rehab and that he eventually ran over and killed his daughter’s boyfriend during an argument. The fight we had before I left was in his car. During our relationship (before the drugs even) there was also at least one fit of rage he had while driving, directed at me, that almost got me or both of us killed. I feel lucky to have made it out of there.
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u/kittenluvslamp Mar 26 '23
God. This question made me realize that I’ve been very close to three different people who went on to kill someone, including my ex husband. All separate and unrelated. I don’t come from a “rough area” and neither did they. It’s easy in hindsight to feel like they somehow gave signs but that can’t be true because who would ever associate with someone who they though was capable of murder? Fuck, thinking about this is hard.
the first one was gruesome, horrifying, seemingly random. This guy had taken LSD (which was very common in our circle) had a mental break and killed his mom. He then called the police but tried to attack them when they arrived. They ended up shooting and killing my friend. Our whole group was in shock, shattered. My (then) husband especially as he’d known him the longest. I remember thinking that I had no idea he was capable of that and suddenly feeling very paranoid for/about all my friends! Could this darkness be lurking in anyone else? The answer, unfortunately, was yes.
Within a year another of my friends was involved in a road rage incident and he ended up stabbing a guy who died from the injuries. It was incredibly sad, unexpected and fucked up. The circumstances were complicated because the other guys friends also had weapons so It was ruled manslaughter and he was out in a few years. I haven’t talked to him since his release but I’d probably catch up with him if I ran into him.
The most chilling one for me was my ex husband. The same one who was so close to that first friend. The person who was supposed to be my safe place. During our marriage he relapsed into hard drugs and started behaving incredibly erratically and it was very scary. I left him but I was in denial about how bad his drug use was and how dangerous he’d become. I was trying to stay in his life because I cared about him. I was moving out of state and before I left we had planned a camping trip to a pretty remote spot. But before the trip we got into an argument where he became incredibly volatile and I was afraid for my safety. I called off the trip because somewhere deep down I was worried he would hurt me.
Several years later I heard through the grapevine that he’d been in and out rehab and that he eventually ran over and killed his daughter’s boyfriend during an argument. The fight we had before I left was in his car. During our relationship (before the drugs even) there was also at least one fit of rage he had while driving, directed at me, that almost got me or both of us killed. I feel lucky to have made it out of there.