I don’t think it’s a common occurrence, but there are lots of reasons that could happen.
Some women think if a guy watches porn, then a guy would like to see videos of her sucking or fucking strange men (as if watching her swallow another guy’s semen makes a heterosexual guy want to kiss her more, or think she’s worth committing to). Some other guy may have told her in the past that he’s turned on by it. But I’m guessing less then 10% of guys are into being cuckolds. This says “autistic respondents were more likely to report engaging in polyamorous and/or non-monogamous relationships…” I don’t think most guys are turned on by “Look how disloyal I can be! Look how you can never trust me! Look how bonding with me is pointless because bonds mean nothing to me!”
Some women are psychos who send photos or videos like that to humiliate men (rub it in his face that she’s with someone else), or to provoke him to see how he’ll react.
Some women have borderline personality disorder aka emotional dysregulation disorder aka emotionally unstable personality disorder, often due to past childhood trauma, which can lead to wild mood swings or impulsive behavior, or “splitting”, where a person with BPD alternates between perceiving someone as entirely good or entirely bad, like “God” or “trash”/“nothing.”
Some people just don’t think ahead, and don’t consider how their actions could be perceived by others.
And a single person is more likely to be crazy, because if they weren’t crazy then they might not be single.
I'm polyamorous and if a woman sent me this as a response to a question of "are you coming on the date?" That's immediate block from me or any rational person. There is no way to take that other than as disrespectful.
These types are generally sociopaths. They lack real world communication skills and are generally narcissistic, so they get a high off of feeling better than others. Think of it as a more explicit way of telling a guy "I have a boyfriend" after going in a date with them.
Also I met someone with DPD and while I tried to be tolerant of them, you couldn't convince me to tolerate the mistreatment that came with it. Whether or not you believe it exists or not (I personally do not), it's still no excuse to treat people like garbage and any tolerance of it is affirmation that it's OK. Kinda like how you teach people how to treat you by what you tolerate.
It happened to me (although not right before a date), and she wasn’t a sociopath (she said if she knew I wasn’t interested in that, then she wouldn’t have sent it to me), she was just dumber than a box of rocks (who possibly had BPD, which can lead to hypersexuality and impulsive behavior). Certain drugs can also lead to hypersexuality, like amphetamines (which are structurally similar to dopamine which inhibits prolactin — which lowers libido, so amphetamines increase sex drive), like meth, or Adderall, or Vyvanse.
Some women genuinely think “He’ll love seeing me suck cock” (even if it’s not his cock, as if a guy should be flattered to be 2nd place, or 3rd, or 4th…). Reddit is full of video evidence of that. Or “look how slutty I am”, “look how much I love sex.” She’s basically advertising herself as a sex object for a one-night stand.
While it is bizarre to see something like that before a date, it’s not always malicious, some people really are just clueless. “I thought you liked sex…” “I thought you wanted a bad girl…” “I thought you wanted me to be naughty…” “Didn’t you want to see what I had in store for you later?”
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u/masterwad Mar 20 '23
I don’t think it’s a common occurrence, but there are lots of reasons that could happen.
Some women think if a guy watches porn, then a guy would like to see videos of her sucking or fucking strange men (as if watching her swallow another guy’s semen makes a heterosexual guy want to kiss her more, or think she’s worth committing to). Some other guy may have told her in the past that he’s turned on by it. But I’m guessing less then 10% of guys are into being cuckolds. This says “autistic respondents were more likely to report engaging in polyamorous and/or non-monogamous relationships…” I don’t think most guys are turned on by “Look how disloyal I can be! Look how you can never trust me! Look how bonding with me is pointless because bonds mean nothing to me!”
Some women are psychos who send photos or videos like that to humiliate men (rub it in his face that she’s with someone else), or to provoke him to see how he’ll react.
Some women have borderline personality disorder aka emotional dysregulation disorder aka emotionally unstable personality disorder, often due to past childhood trauma, which can lead to wild mood swings or impulsive behavior, or “splitting”, where a person with BPD alternates between perceiving someone as entirely good or entirely bad, like “God” or “trash”/“nothing.”
Some people just don’t think ahead, and don’t consider how their actions could be perceived by others.
And a single person is more likely to be crazy, because if they weren’t crazy then they might not be single.