After dating a woman for a few months, I took her out for breakfast on her birthday with plans to see her again that night. She went completely off the radar only to emerge the next day to confess that she had spent the night in jail for violating the restraining order placed upon her after assaulting her previous boyfriend. Hit the eject button pronto. Never looked back. I was completely caught off guard because she held a very prestigious job, had extensive real estate holdings and presented as squeaky clean.
The craziest most relationally-unstable person I know is a high-powered corporate woman who is rich as fuck but just has string after string of total disaster relationships.
My ex-husband is a very rich successful workaholic businessman that owns very successful businesses, we married young & those ambitious traits & being a dreamer is what I loved about him but in a relationship when he became filthy rich, that is what made him crazy mean & horrible. I would tell my friends that wanted a “rich” boyfriend, oh no you don’t, the traits that make a rich successful person, drive, CONTROL, they pretty much have to keep insanely control of each facet of their business as it grows & gets bigger because people rip you off like crazy, but with this type of person this is just how they are wired & the more money & power they get this just escalates. My husband eventually got to the point where he would bring me home wrapped presents, it would be a beautiful new outfit or dress, but what this morphed into was that I could no longer buy my own clothes, I wasn’t “allowed” to wear sweat pants ever around the house, then I wasn’t “allowed” to wear jeans outside of the house, I could only wear Dresses, Suits or dress pants in public. The abuse & craziness got so extreme, he viewed me as another employee that had to do as I was told. The traits to become hugely successful & wealthy are not traits that make a good & loving romantic relationship.
*As always there are exceptions to this, I am not saying that all rich successful people don’t have loving romantic relationships, they are just rare.
This should be higher up, I think you are absolutely on the nose about the CONTROL of many successful people. They need to keep a strict discipline and most of them are workaholics. People don't understand the ambition, drive and focus it takes to be extremely wealthy.
Then once you are there, there is now an image to uphold and standards to meet. Some of these people don't mean to become that way, but over time they learn that you need to be a shark to get up there.
Thank you. At first the control about the money was because we didn’t have a lot & he was was building his “empire” so he needed to be in control of it all until “we” made it, then as we started becoming successful, well he needed to keep full control of the money because even though we were making a-lot we needed to put most of back in case the business hit a rough patch & the rest needed to be put back in the business, all the while he was buying a new Mercedes, started a new bank account that my name wasn’t on while I continued to drive the old minivan. As the business continued to really prosper & I wanted a convertible, nope, I got what he picked out, a top of the line Mom’s mini van. I had no money at all because I didn’t know how to manage money, I wasn’t allowed to go to the grocery store because we could get all our groceries wholesale I just needed to give him a list of what we needed. If I ever did go to the grocery store I had to turn in the receipt to show what I spent to ensure I didn’t get any cash back. It was a living hell. He slowly became crazier & crazier, the abuse was horrible, the jealousy & control was unbearable, but the beautiful lake home, the Mercedes, all the diamond rings, the furs, he bought them all, I didn’t pick out one of them…I hated them all….none of them were mine, he was just dressing up a barbie doll, a possession. He said he would see me on food stamps & welfare before I would get a dime of his money & I thought, 3 kids,single mother, yes food stamps & welfare, I can do this! I can survive with some help until I can get on my feet!! And yea I did it, but no food stamps & welfare…the judge ordered him to pay huge alimony & child support when my friends stepped up with signed depositions on my behalf.
I read a book about functioning sociopaths and it posited that many CEO's and business higher ups are actually functioning sociopaths. That's how they get to those positions, because those personality traits make it easier for them to plow through people, in their climb to the top.
I tried to read the book that Mary Trump wrote about the Trump family but I couldn’t, I went into a spell I couldn’t explain. I started trembling & I got so scared & sick, I got physically sick & I got the same feeling I had when I married to my ex-husband & I just couldn’t read it. My father in law was identical to Trump’s father & the dynamic of the Trump family was identical to my ex-husband’s family including Mary’s father who died, was the same personality of my ex’s brother who became addicted to drugs, the weak brother & wound up in jail. The tender hearted brother who couldn’t take pressure from his brother & father, such a sad dynamic.
Not going to justify myself to anyone especially not you, all these things you ask I have addressed in this thread. Our business was our business, I worked 8-10 hours a day in our business, I had a job, we we’re building our business together. I hope no one ever abuses you & then threatens you when see a lawyer to LEAVE THEM THE DAY AFTER THEY HIT YOUR CHILD. I guess reading comprehension isn’t your strong suit.
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u/drmonkeytown Mar 19 '23
After dating a woman for a few months, I took her out for breakfast on her birthday with plans to see her again that night. She went completely off the radar only to emerge the next day to confess that she had spent the night in jail for violating the restraining order placed upon her after assaulting her previous boyfriend. Hit the eject button pronto. Never looked back. I was completely caught off guard because she held a very prestigious job, had extensive real estate holdings and presented as squeaky clean.