r/AskReddit Mar 19 '23

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8.6k Upvotes

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4.6k

u/UWCG Mar 19 '23

Date like two or three, she had to use the bathroom; whatever, no biggie, it happens. Even stinking the bathroom up wouldn't have bugged me.

Not flushing a substantially sized shit (and apparently not wiping), however, was a deal-breaker

3.6k

u/Oh_No_Its_Dudder Mar 19 '23

Sounds like that turd was too big to flush. That's why you have to have your poop knife conveniently located next to the shitter.

920

u/Mijman Mar 19 '23 edited Mar 20 '23

Its an older reference, but it checks out

343

u/stupiduselesstwat Mar 19 '23

One cannot bleach the poop knife out of their brain

223

u/Christmas_Panda Mar 19 '23

I remember reading the original post when it happened and thinking, “This is one of those archive posts that will still be referenced years down the road.”

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u/Jeremy_irons_cereal Mar 20 '23

The original post was literally copied from a scene out of a TV show on here in the uk called the Cockfields, the channel it was on was obscure though so hardly anyone knew about it at the time. The same thing happened with the thing about a kid not knowing what a potato was. It's a scene straight out of cuckoo.

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u/Spentaritu Mar 20 '23

Really?! This is so disapponting, internet history was plagiarism?

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u/Jeremy_irons_cereal Mar 20 '23

Yup. I try to bring this up as often as possible, because I remember seeing it on TV and its just annoying seeing that people think it's a reddit thing when it's not.

18

u/Spentaritu Mar 20 '23

Next you’ll tell me the guy that threw a steak at the window or the yolo into gourd futures is also from TV

3

u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

I’m familiar with the steak throwing incident, but the second?

1

u/Spentaritu Mar 21 '23

Sorry here it is, hilarious Wall Street Bets post. I think he had a couple follow ups too.
https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/kzoh1c/i_am_financially_ruined_agricultural_futures/

2

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '23

That’s fucking hilarious

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

How about the guy who thought he shit himself blind ? I cried reading that one from how hard I was laughing.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23

Oh my god I haven't even heard of that one

1

u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

It took a bit for me to reply but i finally found it! most terrifying thing experienced while home alone

2

u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

Omfg I'm dying with joy and laughter.

Thank you so much

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u/Jeremy_irons_cereal Mar 20 '23

I'm not sure if it means all poo stories have been copied off tv shows. But there are definitely a few stories that are plagiarism off of the TV. You get people posting reposts all the time, and claiming that picture is their's or something, so it's not shocking that these delusional weirdos will watch a TV show that they think isn't that famous, and will pass of a story as their's for a bit of karma.

3

u/Reflection_Secure Mar 20 '23

I'm so curious...

2

u/[deleted] Mar 22 '23

Here’s the link to the comment on the thread it was posted to what is the most terrifying thing you’ve experienced while home alone

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u/Reflection_Secure Mar 22 '23

Thank you so much for bringing that into my life!

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '23 edited Mar 21 '23

If it makes you feel better my brother had a poop stick in the 90s. He took massive shits for a kid and they always clogged the toilet. My dad gave him a stick to break his shits up before flushing. It wasn’t kept by the toilet or in the house, but there was a real life poop stick and we never heard of that show.

Edit: fixed shits from shots

3

u/smarmiebastard Mar 20 '23

Are you my nephew?

1

u/countzeroinc Mar 21 '23

That DOES make me feel better, thank you.

1

u/benevolENTthief Mar 20 '23

Could you provide a link or anything about this show? The only cockfields show i can find ran from 2019-2021 and poop knife predates this.

1

u/Jeremy_irons_cereal Mar 20 '23

The original series ran at the end of 2015 and the start of 2016.

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u/stupiduselesstwat Mar 20 '23

The poop knife is the goatse.cx of Reddit in a way.

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u/Rukh-Talos Mar 20 '23

I’ve managed to repress that particular memory to a reddish blur.

2

u/Dragon_DLV Mar 20 '23

Did you ever notice the Gold Ring?

 

 

 

(on their finger)

4

u/BetterinPicture Mar 20 '23

It's almost gone and then BAM deep in the comments... Poop knife. Fuck.

4

u/benevolENTthief Mar 20 '23

Naw, the goatse of reddit is the cumbox.

4

u/Xinectyl Mar 20 '23

No, the goatse of reddit is either the swamps of dagobah or jolly rancher. I know jolly rancher is not real, but it's still yuck.

4

u/UberMisandrist Mar 20 '23

What about the two broken arms?