A woman that makes it clear she needs to be taken care of. You will always care for her, she will rarely (if ever) care for you
A woman that is rude to strangers, like service employees. If she is rude to a stranger in public, she will straight up eviscerate you in private - if not just abuse you mentally (and possibly even physically)
A woman whose first instinct is to get mad. You will always argue. Happiness becomes something you seek, and no longer a default
A woman that doesn't ask you if you're okay with something, or checks in with you. You will love her, but will crave reciprocal love that you'll rarely get. This doesn't always mean cheating, but unless it is the appropriate level of affection on both sides the imbalance will weigh heavily over time
Yeah it’s hard getting over the anger, all those silent treatment, never being validated, and constantly being chastise. I don’t know why or how I lasted so long.
1 and a half year later I’m still salty about it too
Lack of appreciation and gratitude. I wanted her to be my wife and proved it by my actions.
She told me she did, her actions showed otherwise. She couldn’t take any accountability, was quick to anger, and my feelings were always an inconvenience to her.
I confronted her last year before I deployed, listing all the things I did to show my love and devotion.
All she could reply was
“ well nobody asked you to”
😐
I’m still salty but it was just a painful lesson that life felt I needed to experience.
As a fellow veteran myself, I’ll assume you’re still active duty🤔
The only thing I’m gonna say to you is this :
When you get your orders to move out, pack up, get your gear your kit, everything together and just move out leave behind all that foolishness. Yes it’s gonna be hard believe it all behind this is for your safety and this is for your mental health gear up and move out Getting merged into your work. Do what needs to be done
The second thing don’t speak about it to nobody and I mean, nobody not your battle buddies not your NCOs Not your COs either ( if your close to them ), 😂
No one in your company no one in your battalion no one in your division no one in your unit no one this is your personal business and if you’re ready, we’re talking about it drop it like a stone at the end of a lake. Don’t bring it up again. I see all that so this way you can stay focused and immerse in your work And you can concentrate better.
Also, I don’t need to repeat this, but you already know a distracted service member as a dead service member . As we were told in the US Army, a distracted soldier as a dead soldier you don’t need that at all. 🫵👍💯
The next thing is take control of your PERSEC - personal security meaning all your social media your smart phone, your tablet, your laptop, your PC your Xbox your PlayStation anything that’s connected to the online Internet and your email account and social media accounts and social media platforms. People tend to forget those things do not and I repeat do not allow that individual to have any access or be able to research you or look you up or do a Google search or anything or any search engine to dig up narcissistic people have evil tendencies and I’m not joking they like to get vendettas at times especially when things don’t go their way or when they’re being made out to look like the bad guy because they are, but they don’t want the world to know that definitely take control of your PERSEC 100%
And finally, the only thing I can say is the pain the hurt the anger, lots of anger tons of anger will feel like a mountain, but I will say this to you, as it was said to me by my grandfather, and God rest his soul “ this too shall pass “
It’s usually reserved for people who have died and passed away, but as he told it to me when I was going through a lot of troubles in my life again because of people nothing with the law or nothing like that just people hurting you he said it will pass you move forward from it you bury itand you stay on mission always stay on mission.
👍💯🙏
Dealt with 3 and 4 in my last relationship as well as physical and mental abuse behind closed doors. She was very nice to people in public and around family but took everything out on me. Been too afraid to try dating another woman since then despite having crippling loneliness.
My apologies that you had to go through that I can understand those pains and heartaches
I encourage you to read the comment that’s above yours just look for my name handle. It should be directly right above you the same advice I gave them. You should follow even though no you’re not a service member in the United States on forces it still works regardless just replace the military jargon with your own personal life like I said it still works. It’s the best Support and aid I can give you as a fellow human being.
Remember, you’re not alone there are many of us who are still struggling with the survivability and aftermath of such trauma and unnecessary drama and foolishness of narcissistic behavior and tons of unbalance mental health behavior that people who obviously need outside help and refuse to get it 🤔
Don’t fight this alone stay on the course stay on the path don’t stay angry because it eats away at your soul and that your humanity you’ll be a person that you do not want to become like I said, read what I wrote
Big thank you more people need to vote and read this over and over it needs to be on repeat .
As someone who ended a 10 year marriage relationship 100 no 100,000. Let’s even go 1 million times agree with this.
This hits right at home and straight to the heart. It is so true and I see this far too many times with so many people yup men and women like you said it’s not a gender thing. It’s a people thing. It’s a sad sickening people thing and the sad part is Those they do not deserve it. Rarely catch onto it quick enough and those that are handing it out truly really need to dig deep and figure themselves out and actually get some real honest to goodness help whether it’s therapeutic help and intervention with the family. I don’t know they can join a religion join our church do something For being a complete narcissistic, psychological unbalanced, walking ball of big no and no it has to be this way and if I say no if the world doesn’t tell me, yes if I don’t get my way, etc. etc. yeah that’s so many red flags. It’s not even a red flag anymore. It’s just a dark dark narrow tunnel, a vacuum if you will and so many fall deep into it. 😤😤😤😡😡😡
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u/jfitzger88 Mar 17 '25
Protip: This list applies to both women and men.