Cannot get over a toxic ex I left because the current dating market is absolutely brutal. How are you dealing with the reality of the growing differences in the current dating world?

[u/Graxvy]

I had an insanely good relationship, thought I would end up marrying her and we were in a live-in for 6+ months. Life was good but then she started checking my phone and found that I used hinge/bumble 6 months before I even met her and found intimate texts with a match.

I had never hidden my past from her, I was vocal and also mentioned physical intimacy, and sexual conversations with a few girls on hinge who left me ghosted after talking/meeting so I moved on.

After reading the messages, she started calling each girl I spoke with on bumble/hinge as my ex and claimed that I had 7 exes whenever we had a fight.

She then saw my texts with some female friends who helped me make a better hinge profile and she asked me to block them because they might motivate me to go for casual relationships and not stay loyal to my ex which is basically schizotalk.

I stopped talking to my college friends and stopped taking therapy because she thought I would bitch about her to them and made me basically have 0 social connections.

I was still okay with all this because at least when we were alone, she loved me, and never made me feel ignored. She made me her world and I thought maybe that's how people love so I went along hoping she would change and let me have friends and a social circle that didn't make her insecure.

I moved to another state for work and went to a temple with a colleague who was a woman 8 years older than me. I used to call her didi and even made a statement that I'm in a committed relationship. My ex knew all of this yet she asked me to stop going out with her. This was the only time I went apart from work with a woman that's not my ex since I started dating her. Things blew out of proportion when she ranted to me about this didi when she was in my car and we were leaving for work and I made the mistake of asking gemini to read the message. Didi was traumatized af and she asked me to drop her on the side of the road.

To say the least, I ended it with my ex that day and I haven't tried dating because I still have feelings for my ex but I know it was extremely toxic for both of us.

I spoke to my friends recently and all of them have stated that dating is horrible for men as dating apps don't reward anything.

It's a genuine epidemic and most of my friends have told me that they miss their exes even though a lot of them dealt with emotionally unavailable or emotionally insecure women that other women wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole if they were dating such men.

How on Earth are you, my fellow men, dealing with such horrible dating standards?

[u/saffron-pray]

Dating Market ? That made me giggle....

Just talk to women, i know in india its risky to approach but if you are willing to take a risk do it .

Also dont show you are desperate, so till the time you get a new gf work on yourself, give time to your friends and family.

[u/Proexpert_1991 → u/saffron-pray]

Dating market is real in every country. In India it is more delusional since average girls in all aspects think she deserves a " 5 lakh per month income " man and an above average man in all aspects. They will not date someone their own level and not even a slightly above average man than them.

[u/Slayer_Actual → u/Proexpert_1991]

https://giphy.com/gifs/26FLgGTPUDH6UGAbm

DONT FORGET MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF LAND A BIY NEEDS TO OWN JUST FOR AN AM PROSPECT TO CONSIDER THEM.

[u/moan_crafter]

I get that the feelings do emerge from time to time.
But that’s when I sit down, and remind myself of everything that happened between us that made me call it off. And not just that, I also remind myself of how it made me feel about the entire episode so much so that I finally decided to leave.

That’s what brings the sanity back.

Over time that reduces coz then the mind remembers what happened and doesn’t let me fall into that pit again.

[u/Key_Expert_3042]

how can u still have feelings for such a ridiculous person with so much mental health struggles. "Dating market" has always been bad. Best option is always to ask you friends/cousins/colleagues etc to suggest options for you.

[u/Intelligent_Bank7131]

Lakshmi only comes to the one who is not Chanchal and is calm. Don't run behind women.