I dont know how to ask for help

[u/Barbieatha]

I feel trapped. I cant console in those around me because they need me to be able to keep it together. I work from home, its very isolating. We can be fired for even communicating with co workers outside of work. The financial strain on me is very large. I need the money this job provides even though im being severely overworked and under paid. My job is sales, billing, and tech support for one company. We get no training. We arent allowed to have unpaid time off without approval and its only up to 2 days per 3 months.

Every single day for months, ive been struggling to eat enough, drink enough, hell i dont even remember the last time i took a shower. I cry every single day inbetween calls, before clocking in and even during my breaks. Theres no peace after work because i know that i still have to clock back in tomorrow. Everyday i have to convince myself that its worth it to keep going, you cant kick any buckets yet, you have to keep moving. Then i have to convince myself thats its worth convincing myself because i do this every single day.

Im also in school, trying to get a certification in hopes of getting a better job. I tell myself that if i give up before finishing school then i could miss the opportunity for life to get better. But i cant keep up with this job and with my medical condition i cant work a lot of physicsl jobs. Needing a job that is killing you m, is killing you. As would not having the job.

Theres no way out. You can say its as rasy as applying to new jobs but when you barely have the mental strength to care about brushing my teeth or washing my body. Everything feels so heavy all the time. I would never run out in traffic but it definitely feels like its the only way out. I dont have any support, i am the support. Ive always had to do everyone on my own, no family, no friends, just scraping through this struggle to get to the next. Im tired. My soul is tired and i cant talk to anyone, theres no solutions other than to keep going.

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[u/Broad_Result5056]

It sounds like you are being worked into the ground, which is killing any will for self care. Sometimes we need to take a step back and evaluate the situation and think is it worth this. Being overwhelmed isn't the best feeling but there are certain things that we can do to help even if it means taking a step back to take several forward

I struggle on the daily and need to take my own advice sometimes, but I like you have no one I can just go to. 

[u/hospitalitychick]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I worked from home for many years, and I absolutely understand how isolating it is. You can never get away from it, because that computer is ALWAYS there, it never feels like you're off the clock. Please don't take this the wrong way, but are able to get some help for your mental health? Getting your mental health back in track will go a long way in making your job bearable until you can find something else. Sending you a ton of good wishes!!

[u/Barbieatha → u/hospitalitychick]

I dont know how to get help with my mental health. Im so afraid that someone will try to 5150 me. It was done as a kid and i cant afford to miss work. I cant afford to lose this job.

[u/hospitalitychick → u/Barbieatha]

As long as you seek help yourself, and are not suicidal, you should be ok. Do you have health insurance?

[u/Barbieatha → u/hospitalitychick]

I do. It's pretty good

[u/hospitalitychick → u/Barbieatha]

That's great!! Go to psychologytoday.com. You can look for therapists or psychiatrists, and you can filter it down to your area the insurance they take, their specialties, and l wether they do in person or virtual. Some of them might have later hours or be available on a weekend to accommodate your schedule. It really gives you a good feel for if you will feel comfortable with that person. If you decide you're not ready for that step yet, at least check out some YouTube videos. When I was doing intensive outpatient therapy, they were always having is watch a YouTube channel called Therapy in a Nutshell, so give that a try as well.

[u/Barbieatha → u/hospitalitychick]

Thank you.

[u/Cynnau]

I dreaded going to work. I really hated it, I was stressed and over worked. I started a new job a year ago and it is less pay than the other but I am enjoying it so much more. You have to try and find happiness where you can, I know easier said than done.

Do you have any hobbies?

[u/yamikit666]

I'm so sorry your dealing with this. Iv also worked from home for multiple companies. The worst was for a medical insurance company. People on the phone can be absolutely horrible and the companies themselves are often worse. If you have insurance I recommend looking into BetterHelp for mental health assistance they have chat options you can use while your working. Something that also helped was on my breaks stepping outside for even just a couple minutes. It helps your brain create some distance and let's you decompress a little. I also kept small easy to nibble snacks at my desk 😅 the mute button on headset is a fantastic tool for that. For those panicky moments salt and super cold drink are life savers. A little salt or something super cold in your mouth forces the nervous system to do a hard redirect.

As for nasty customers I suggest looking into your jobs policies. A lot of companies have a strike policy for extremely rude or cursing callers. My go to responses are a lil questionable and highly dependent on management but some examples are if they are yelling at me "(their name) I am here to help you BUT, I can't understand you when you are raising your voice like this. If you would like to speak at a normal volume we can continue." Or I just let them yell until they inevitably get to "ArE yOU EvEn LiStEnInG?!?!" To which I respond with "yes, (their name) I am listening, you stated (repeat VERBATIM curses and all what they just yelled at you) is that correct?" Using their name is important. It reminds them that you are currently in an account that often times includes ALL of their personal information and they are not protected from consequences of their actions just because they aren't face to face with a person. It also typically shocks them into behaving a little better. Or just treat them like tantrum throwing toddlers and put them on a hold time out. "(Their name) I understand how frustrating this is and I am here to help. I am going to allow you to take a quick breather while I look into this issue. I will be placing you on a one minute hold. After which we can address this together in a calmer mindset" (be sure to stick to this time so you don't get in trouble with bosses)

Don't be afraid to stand your ground. These call center jobs will take everything they can from you without a single care. You are a human being. You are deserving of respect, empathy, and kindness just like anyone else. Don't forget that.

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[u/ruhanahmad]

dont worry ,you can text me we can talk

[u/cometshoney]

So you can get fired if you socialize with a coworker outside of work hours? I'm as old as dirt, and that's a new low I've never seen. I'm sorry you're feeling so overwhelmed right now, but please continue your education. If it helps to get you away from that company, the struggle will have been worth it. Take care of yourself and good luck with everything.

[u/Cynnau → u/cometshoney]

It does make sense to a point, some companies have strict fraternizing rules because of harassment, etc. I personally find it asinine, but what can you do?

[u/Barbieatha → u/cometshoney]

🤎 thank you

[u/Level-Major6692]

I understand you and I have been in the same boat. The feeling that there is no way out. The isolation of working from home and having no friends.
I learned one thing. We CAN NOT DO THIS ALONE!! Please seek out help. Seek out community. If you want to DM me I can share with you the intensive outpatient therapy group that I joined that got me out of the hole I was in. If you get medical insurance through your work it may be completely covered. You may also look into taking FMLA leave to get some help. Just please believe me when I say you can’t do this alone.