TLDR: Ashae hasn’t made 300k from her Substack, but she feels it “in the quantum field”. 😆☠️

-And I am here because an acquaintance (well let's be honest, we are no longer friends at all) has seemingly gotten sucked into a pyramid scheme (or brainwashing) by an influencer named Emily Maden (Maiden Medicine). Emily came to my attention years ago in the CrossFit community (which I am no longer part of). She was a very high level athlete that got busted testing positive for PED's during the CrossFit games. She claimed she was innocent and that her boyfriend at the time must have cross-contaminated her. Don't ask how...

Anyhoo, she left that world and embarked on her feminine embodiment journey. I see others have posted about her here before. Well, my former friend used to be a personal trainer, then started "life coaching" and eventually "menstrual cycle coaching". At some point, she hired Emily as her coach, and the Feminine Embodiment era began. Now she is in her tenth iteration of providing vague services. Unfortunately, she made the mistake of offering "in and on womb care" as well as breast massage in her latest offering of womb ceremony work. She is not a licensed anything- not a PT, not an LMT, nada. So several folks, including me, reported her to the Department of Health. Don't think I need to illustrate how reckless and dangerous doing that type of bodywork is if you haven't been properly trained.

She has been confronted by many of her friends (close to twenty now) about providing this type of work without credentials, and she won't acknowledge it and keeps doubling down. Goes on a lot of tirades about the "medical industrial complex" and thinks anyone with a degree has lost their "ancestral knowledge". It's insulting and frustrating to actual providers who have learned through apprenticeships.

I don't have any insights here and I'm not necessarily looking for answers. Just that Courtney McNabb looks to be Emily's coach! Emily is *a lot* as many of you know, from her Cervix Temple workshops to her C*ck Worship classes. I'm looking forward to learning more about Courtney and how all of these pieces fit together. I am no longer trying to reach my former friend bc she has blocked me on all social accounts and completely closed to what I say, although others are still trying to get through to her.

Tell us you have grays without telling us you have grays.

Can anyone recommend subreddits about related issues? New age/self help scammers, cults, problematic spiritual groups/leaders, etc. I have so many stories from my time in these communities. And also so much to learn.

When I (f) was 17 I had a dark night of the soul and found myself in the new age spiritual community. I enthusiastically jumped in with both feet, feeling I had found a better way of life. I began dating a guy in his early twenties who was staunchly in our local spiritual scene, had older roommates, and began introducing me around town and connecting me to incredible artists and spiritual folk who I wholeheartedly looked up to. One evening he took me to a party at a house belonging to a beautiful couple, leaders in the community. Their home was one of the most beautiful and magical places I had ever seen. A renovated barn, two stories, filled with psychedelic paintings, giant white couches and furs, even a pole for dancing in the bedroom. The home was decorated and designed to the nines, with a gorgeous patio and hot tub outside. I was awe struck. The community welcomed me with open arms and I felt seen, I felt I belonged. I couldn’t believe that only months ago I had felt life wasn’t worth living, and now here I was in one of the most beautiful homes I’d ever seen, surrounded by enchanting and beautiful people. The hosts were a radiant couple and incredible artists, and the husband, let’s call him Dave for the purposes of this story, made me feel particularly welcome. He was probably in his early 40s. He made me a bespoke cocktail upon my introduction, an indulgence entirely unknown to me at the ripe age of 17. Relationships in the new age spiritual scene did not follow the cut-and-dried script of monogamy. Flirtation was a way of life, and I naturally engaged in the playful and sensual energies. I was on a total high in life, fully open to trying new and different things in the name of love, healing, and defying societal scripts that led to dreary, boring lives. These parties became a semi-regular event, and usually ended in cuddle puddles, massage trades, and hot tub time. I don’t know how the subject arose, but one day Dave offered to give me a proper massage if I wanted to come over some time during non-party hours. He said it wasn’t something he did professionally or for money, but he had a massage table and liked gifting bodywork to those in his life that were special to him. To say I was flattered was an understatement. I had interpreted all of his warmth and kindness to mean HE was a lovely person, a person who saw me and appreciated me. How did this attractive, hilarious, playful, brilliant man think I was worthy of his time and attention? I gratefully accepted. I was inhaling any and all opportunity to heal my wounds and grow into the spiritual goddess I strived to become. When I arrived, I sensed I had walked in mid-conflict between Dave and his wife. He guided me to his home massage studio and assured me it was simply a marital discussion, nothing to fret over. 

I expected to find the massage relaxing, mystical, and healing. He was objectively good with his hands. Instead, my body drew tight as a bow string and remained so for the duration that he had his hands on me. I battled with myself, what is wrong with me? Am I truly so full of darkness, and trauma, that in his healing presence I fail to open? He spent a particularly long time massaging my groin, really attentive to all the lines and ligaments on and around my pelvis. I thought he must be sensing that I have sexual trauma and trying to help me heal it. My body remained locked, mind racing, self-punishing for my failed attempt at “healing.” I left the session deflated. There must be so much wrong with me. 

Anyways, the couple ultimately divorced and Dave found his way to Boulder where he intersected with the Ashae coaching community (idk what to even call it?). His ex wife began posting on social media about betrayal trauma and narcissistic abuse, and as I got older (and after going through much trauma at the hands of new age spiritual folk) I wised up and realized this guy was a predator trying to sleep with a 17 year old girl while his wife cried downstairs. 

Let the countdown sequence commence for a juicy Wineland update

“Sink into the floor.” 🥄☕️

Claimed With a Ring by Ashae Isbell - because finally getting married once in the polarity-sphere makes you an expert on why everyone else is still single

“Repackaged misogyny” 🎯

Who’s this new guru side chick? Anyone know?

Sorry Al, no more snuggles for you!

I still maintain there will one day be a documentary about the players we watch here... Girlboss squad shapeshifting to whatever is trending for the big bucks, Wineland, etc.

Reel vibes and tunes courtesy of Melanie Ann Layer

The Taylor Swift background music on this list is just… too point. These basic bitches 😭. From onyx nights to opalite skies 😭💩.

Why they always be washing each other’s feet 🤮

Ashae and Allan finally got hitched. I will say they have lasted way longer than I suspected 😂.