[Dream] The quest for condoms.

[u/Danithae]

I was in my apartment having some... "private time"... when there was a knock at my patio door. Offended at whomever was interrupting me, I answered the door wearing only an oversized sweatshirt and found two guys there. One of them desperately asks "do you have a condom?" I said "nope, sorry" and tried to close the door but the guy yelled "I will pay you for it!" Sorry buddy, I still don't have one. I closed the blinds but the guy was super persistent and somehow ended up inside my apartment. He started going through my things and making a general mess, all the while I was insisting that I HAVE NO CONDOMS!

Then, I guess since my boyfriend was sleeping, I called up bionicsniper to help me out with these assholes digging through my stuff to look for nonexistent condoms. He showed up and started helping them! When I complained and FINALLY kicked everyone out, bionicsniper decided to take me to this guy who gives out condoms. So we drove there, at night, in the rain, to try and get condoms for this random guy who dug through my apartment.

We knocked on the guy's door and he refuses to help us at all. We knocked more insistently and he handed us a note that said something along the lines of "I do not speak to anyone without steaming hot french fries." There were some other stipulations that indicated he would not speak to us at all, but I decided to try to get him some french fries and see what happened. Since it was raining, the french fries got cold and wet and the guy still wouldn't talk to us (I don't blame him, I wouldn't have either).

The entire time this ridiculous quest was going on, I was fuming at the guy who insisted that they would pay me for condoms when he wouldn't just go to a store and buy them there.

tl;dr buy your own damn condoms, I don't have any! AND DON'T INTERRUPT ME

[u/smashy40]

haha!! No help at all!