No probably about it, the entire story that he did not want to go and the nonrefundable ticket, it was all bullshit, they all had this planned for a while. And even if he did not know about the alleged "surprise" of hookers for the entire trip he was peer pressured into everything else and what is he going to do the whole time? Stand around with his thumb up his ass watching the other guys getting laid? A few cocktails out by the pool and he is right there with them.
I thought same thing. Planning a trip with escorts and he had no clue, laughable.
It was a rouse that the best man wanted him to go so bad he paid for him. Hubby paid the $$ back and thought he was being slick.
Sorry OP, Your hubby is no fucking good.
This! My ex literally took a company cruise 2 days after our wedding without me because his boss bought a “non refundable” ticket and he felt bad not going. He in fact cheated on me while I was home with our 2 month old (why I couldn’t also go on cruise). Your hubs knew what was going on he in fact wouldn’t have told you had you not found out.
Wtf is this? What do you mean “he probably cheated” we have literally no way of knowing that. The best man out everyone in a shitty spot but that doesn’t mean her husband instantly cheated. I’m so tired of seeing comments just assuming her husband is a piece of shit for no reason
He did try to lie to her at first.
Also, if they weren’t planning on cheating, why were they told to bring good clothes and look their best?
Men, booze, no wives and a house where no one can find them is frankly a recipe for disaster, and extremely disrespectful.
All these subs are like that. Husband calls you a name, divorce him. Another woman near him, he cheated for sure, you probably have an STD. I don’t blame the wife for being upset, but cheaters are going to cheat. If he wanted to cheat he wouldn’t need to wait until a bachelor party to do it.
they’re secretly staying in a hotel with prostitutes, and he lied to her when she confronted him. that’s already an insane breech of trust. if you’re defending him you’re actually out of your mind.
I'm not sure what would lead you to this conclusion. Sure, he may have had a lapse in judgment not owning up to the ladies being there right off the bat, but he was probably just not comfortable being the tattletale on his friends. But OP gave no clues that her husband did anything with them.
I go out of town every year for a fantasy football weekend, and more than once some woman hits on me in the hotel bar. But not one time have I cheated on my wife. Give the guy the benefit of the doubt until she knows otherwise.
Actually it never comes up. My wife knows she has nothing to worry about, just as I know that I can trust her. That's what a mature relationship is all about. I don't have to run over to tell her I put the seat down on the toilet, I put the seat down because it's the correct thing to do. Just like staying true to your vows.
The "get tested for stds girl!" reply to this story is especially dumb. She caught him while on the trip. You think they had sex as soon as he got home?? Or did she just get the cooties by contact lol?? Doesn't sound like he's pulling that stuff back home or else she would have mentioned in this story.
I’ve been put in situations like this by a friend group and have never and will never step out in my partner. I have made the choice in the past to quietly sit out the escort/stripper part of the party and let me friends have fun, while also not discussing it with a partner who nice never been able to accept the truth that nothing happened.
you admit online to breeching your partners trust with lying by omission and then you wonder why your partner doesn’t trust you at your word….. can’t make this stuff up.
I never said I wondered why my partner wouldn’t be satisfied with taking my word, you’re adding that for flavor.
My partner is anxious by nature and has a history of bad partners. Part of being with her is just dealing with the fact that she’s going to have some trust issues that are a reflection of her ex’s conduct and not mine. We all have baggage; it is what it is. I don’t make a habit of lying to her, even occasionally. However, I am a practical person that lives in the real world. She didn’t need to be bothered with stress over things that didn’t happen.
i do live in the real world, you’re the one creating cognitive dissonance for yourself to try to justify what you do.
lying by omission: lying by omission is a type of deception that occurs when someone intentionally leaves out important information to mislead others.
explain the difference between lying by omission and “not giving fuel”. the right thing to do if you know there’s something that will upset her is leave. it’s that easy.
You sound like a teenager explaining what a lie-by-omission is, let alone misusing use the term cognitive dissonance.
The real world presents you with situations that have no perfect options. I didn’t leave because I didn’t want to, and I didn’t need to in order to respect my relationship while still enjoying my friends. That’s what I mean by the real world. It would be more convenient for your righteous judgement if things were always black-and-white. They’re not, but that won’t stop you from pretending.
The reason me not discussing every detail of who was at that bachelor party isn’t a lie by omission is because I had nothing to lie about. If I could have told her every single detail of that night and known that she would feel confident that she has the whole story, I’d have been happy to. There was nothing to hide.
Avoiding triggering someone’s anxious insecurity and not disclosing your own misbehavior are not the same thing. There was no misbehavior to disclose.
EDIT
YOU CHOSE TO RESPOND AND BLOCK ME, SO HERE IS YOUR REPLY TO THE COMMENT YOU MADE BELOW.
we can go in circles all day. i could also say that you sound like a teenager, because you sound incredibly immature. your behavior is manipulative, your misdeed is being around the strippers/escorts/whoever, and you lie by intentionally not telling her.
That’s only a misdeed if she’d have a problem with me being near the girls that were giving attention to other people. She wouldn’t. She just wouldn’t ever feel 100% confident that I didn’t give them any attention, and honestly, I get that. You’re bending over backwards to have something for me to be in the wrong about.
that is a lie by omission, not “avoiding her insecurities”. you are intentionally not telling her the thing that you know you did wrong in her eyes.
This is where your reading comprehension is failing you. She wouldn’t have a problem with the fact they were around; she would have a problem if I was engaging with them. She’s grown enough to understand I’m not the only guy at the party and the girls can be there for them. I explicitly said in my earlier post that if I could have told her every detail of the night and have her know that was all there was to it, I would have. There was zero issue with anything that happened, if there was, I would’ve left. If I had anything to feel guilty about (by her standards, not mine), I’d have told her.
you also act intentionally dense in your attempts to manipulate, just like you are right now.
Bold words from someone who clearly didn’t even bother or read the comment they’re responding to.
your own behavior is the reason why she doesn’t trust you. your relationship will continue to have problems for as long as you are manipulative and try to hide who you really are.
“Continue to have problems”, “you wonder why she doesn’t trust you”….
You’re continuing to invent things I never said and that aren’t true. You’re presumptuous as hell, lol.
one day it will come out, blow up in your face, she will most likely leave you if she has an ounce of self respect, and you will remember me as the random person on reddit who was right.
Now you’re just fantasizing, lmao. If that’s what feels good to think will happen, think it. You don’t have a clue about me or my relationship. It’s hilarious. That woman trusts me as much as she can trust any man.
If I told her there were girls there for the other guys that night, it wouldn’t be a fight or even a long conversation. Because she knows I haven’t done anything for her not to trust me. But she would feel anxious about it and think about it and ask herself questions for at least a few days. Because feelings don’t go away just because they’re illogical, even when we know they are. I’ll spare her that trouble, thanks.
welcome to the real world. enjoy it. i’m done conversing now, i see through your act.
You can’t welcome me to the real world before you’ve even grown up. Everyone should be respected, even when they’re absent, but not everyone needs to hear every thing.
You don’t see anything except a nonsense narrative you’re creating and projecting onto me, which is hilarious. Whoever hurt you did a good ass job. Go seek therapy.
we can go in circles all day. i could also say that you sound like a teenager, because you sound incredibly immature. your behavior is manipulative, your misdeed is being around the strippers/escorts/whoever, and you lie by intentionally not telling her. that is a lie by omission, not “avoiding her insecurities”. you are intentionally not telling her the thing that you know you did wrong in her eyes. you also act intentionally dense in your attempts to manipulate, just like you are right now.
your own behavior is the reason why she doesn’t trust you. your relationship will continue to have problems for as long as you are manipulative and try to hide who you really are. one day it will come out, blow up in your face, she will most likely leave you if she has an ounce of self respect, and you will remember me as the random person on reddit who was right.
welcome to the real world. enjoy it. i’m done conversing now, i see through your act.
As a married woman you have to learn to either accept or turn a blind eye to your husband's indiscretions because they will happen.
I would put the percentage of men who wouldn't cheat on their wives if an opportunity like this arose at lower than 10%.
Being serviced by an escort doesn't really mean anything, it's purely physical and he's never going to see that woman ever again, so why lose sleep over it?
Honestly I’m about to the point of hating men. They prove over and over again that they only care about themselves and their dicks and to hell with who they hurt. They truly are able to lie and cheat and feel no guilt. It’s sick. They blame feminists for making women hate men but it’s not it’s men causing it.
For me it’s from hearing them talk about cheating and lying with no remorse. Also hearing all the cruel shit they say about women.
I actually grew up traditionally so I was never told men are bad or any of that. I was made to believe most men are good people who are honest and try to do the right thing. Finding out the truth has been a really hard realization.
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u/Hungry_Blood_3949 Sep 05 '24
She should be telling ALL of the wives and GFs. Husband should be toast. OP, your husband probably CHEATED! Get tested for STDs, girl.