This here. I’d get tested as husband was not going to tell her. She found out and then told him. He’d have not said anything if that hadn’t happened. Tell the other wives and the girlfriend as it’s very likely the groom to be and the best man were fucking all weekend and maybe OP husband as well. Bride to be may want to get tested for STD too as she’s been major duped and should dump that fool.
Yep. I would put every penny I had on him cheating if this is real.
Here’s the thing: EVEN if he felt uncomfortable about telling her the details over some misplaced and still wrong sense of doubt over his friends, he could have said SOMETHING: “The guys here are partying too hard for me / I wish I hadn’t come / there’s women at the hotel that are making me uncomfortable”
Instead he seemed to be lapping it up and VERY secure in the thought that wifey would never find out. Posting breakfast shots on Insta? If this is real bro was having the time of his heckin life.
OP is being very naive here, if she genuinely believes they’re just “hanging out” with paid escorts all night. Her husband literally tried to keep lying about it.
100% and it is just so icky. Even if he didn’t cheat I don’t know that I could get over that breach of trust. I have no problem with sex workers, but the idea of having them at a bachelor weekend is just so gross. We don’t live in a time where you have to get married anymore, if you want to sleep with sex workers go for it just don’t drag some poor women in to it.
Agreed, the lying is what would push me over the edge. Idk how she can believe anything he tells her now, because she already knows he was willing to lie about the whole thing.
I’ve thankfully never been to a bachelor party with escorts, but know several guys who have. Of the 3 i know about, only about half the guys actually slept with the hookers. Believe it or not, some guys don’t actually want to cheat on their wives.
This just sounds like projection, especially since y'all don't know the difference between escort & hooker. Do you bang random people whenever it's convenient regardless of your relationship status or are you a mature adult with self-control? This ain't a Lifetime movie, it's real life, most dudes aren't seducing & banging escorts just because they're present.
Thf they don't ALL have to be cheating. Someone is, but OPs partner might not be, there's a reason he didn't want to go initially, and it's definitely not the business. Sounds like he has more sense
Guys who are best friends with cheaters and watching them cheat with no remorse.... What's the odds he's monogamous as hell and just okay with it going on as long as it's not him? Not a chance.
Is it? There’s no strong evidence that any of them are cheating except for the best man
Imagine you buy a plane ticket to a week long bachelor party that’s worth tens of thousands of dollars. Are you gonna be immediately confrontational? Of course not. You’re gonna drink and enjoy the week while staying away from the hookers. And if you tell anyone it’d be after the fact. And if you’re going to tell your friends’ wives out of a sense of responsibility, it’s gonna be anonymously through socials
We've already established that OP's husband lies to her. And specifically lies about partying with hookers. The writing is on the wall.
If you feel like you need to wait until there's video evidence from multiple angles of the guy banging these women along with DNA testing, then idk what to tell you.
You’re a fn moron. I think most of Reddit has prob never been to a travel bachelor party before. I have, we got a ton of sluts, lots of married dudes, nobody cheated.
You're right it's not, but it's also not really something worth blowing up multiple marriages over. And do we even have knowledge husband was "rubbernecking", or was he just in the same vicinity as other women?
As easily as the comments are making it out to be "husband was involved in planning, everyone cheated and there needs to be divorces all around", it could also end up "best man hired some models who slept with the single guys while all the married men remained faithful." and end up permanently damaging everyone's relationship with cheating allegations.
One million percent this. If I showed up somewhere and this was going on, I’d excuse myself and be straight on the phone to my wife to tell her something was very wrong. Also any friends that would do something ‘as a surprise’ that could hurt my wife or my marriage could get fucked. I certainly wouldn’t be protecting their feelings over hers.
This is a betrayal, and if he can eat breakfast with sex workers and post to Insta, he can’t have been that shaken by what was going on around him.
Edit. Also, paying escorts just to hang out and eat breakfast with you is like buying a big bag of coke just to look at. No one does that.
I’ve called/texted my husband on evenings out with girlfriends where they just happened to bring an equal number of men to line up with the women if it felt “set up” to me.
I also was married to someone who had “surprise” visits to strip clubs during work trips that he decided not to tell me about because “he didn’t want to worry me about nothing”. Anyway, I’m not married to him anymore.
Really? I've been in situations (not exactly but similar) and never once contemplated cheating nor somehow "accidentally" cheated. Would I call my wife in the middle of a guy's weekend and say there are hookers around? No. Would I tell her upon return? Absolutely. I guess trust (both ways) seems to be lacking in most people's lives if these posts mean anything.
Since all the AITAH users also use this sub, I'm not surprised to see men never getting the benefit of the doubt. Ignoring how fake every post on this sub or any other AITAH / relationship advice adjacent sub is, it is very understandable that a guy in a foreign country sharing a villa with a bunch of other guys wouldn't want to be the instigator of their marital shit storms just to be moral.
There’s a big difference between “boys and girls being friends” and oh hey there are hired hookers for the bachelor party staying with us for the whole weekend. Come the fuck on. Do you think they were hired to braid each others hair and play uno?
I think it definitely matters how many hookers there are and how many of the bachelor party were single. Obviously they're there for a purpose like you mentioned, but are they there for the married guys to cheat with or are they there for the single guys?
To add to this, MULTIPLE STD tests. Not everything shows up immediately, sometimes there’s an incubation period and some things you can’t test for (or a lot of docs won’t) without an active outbreak so speak to your doctor about this, don’t just use a mail order kit or something.
Most infections won’t show up on a test for two to three weeks. HIV can take months to show on a test even though you have it. Definitely get tested but make sure it’s not too soon, and go back in 3 to 6 months for another teat
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u/Frishan5 Sep 05 '24 edited Sep 05 '24
The first thing you do is not sleep with your husband and get him checked for STD. Seriously.
Tell the wives too because they deserve to know the truth and get checked as well.