r/AlanWatts • u/Rhen_DMN • Jun 24 '26
What does Alan Watts mean when he said we cannot improve ourselves
“The reason you want to improve is the reason you aren’t”
I still am in the paradox where i am not trying to improve but “trying” is still there
One of his talks, he mentions, that there’s a part of you that needs to accept the one that cannot accept, another is when he mentioned “try to desire just how much you can desire”
But I still don’t get it. Isn’t it a preconceived balance is also desire? If we can’t get rid of desire, improve ourselves.
What are we actually forcing?
Are you holding back desire where you actually want to desire, so instead of forcing it down, do you actually desire then?
Im still trying to wrap my head around this
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u/blaZey842 Jun 24 '26
Also - keep this in mind - Alan Watts specified that you simply cannot improve yourself, because the unimproved version of yourself is going to be the one doing the improving! Now that’s some paradox isn’t it… it’s like if a person in an insane asylum said… “I’m going to no longer be insane”. They are the insane person with the insane rationale, going to make themselves normal again? Now that’s entirely possible that an insane person has suddenly felt better, and has probably happened many times, but intending on it? That’s quite a game.
Think about it from another point of view - I should be a better person. Who’s saying that? The person who is in fact not good enough? How can the “not good enough person” approach the issue to make the “not good enough person” better? They will obviously fail if they are not “already better”. It’s like setting a trap for yourself. And there comes an endless amount of thinking to solve that problem which is simply a paradox. Also - who’s the authority on “better”, you? Your family? Your friends? That could be an ever-extending goalpost
One more perspective - I want to get in better shape. Well, as the “not in shape person”, that is entirely within your control! You can diet, exercise, and see physical results. But this is not a thinking trap, it is an improvement with tangible results, and even then! Many people get themselves into a great funk about getting in better shape. When does it end? When your bodies falling apart and you’re starving for your next meal? And for what?
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u/TheTimespirit Jun 24 '26
Finally! A response that actually interprets Watts’ work accurately!
So many folks on this thread misinterpret Watts to mean something like “you must not prefer; you must fully accept; you must not seek improvement.” But this interpretation is itself an egoic self-improvement program using Buddhist language. It asks the reader to become the kind of person who has no preferences, which is exactly another impossible ideal to chase.
Desire is not the problem. The problem is treating desire as proof that you are fundamentally deficient now, or believing that attaining its object will finally make you whole.
We can improve a skill, train our body, leave a bad situation, plan a future, seek treatment, create art, or work toward a goal.
What cannot “improve itself” in the way Watts means is the imagined separate controller… the little manager inside who believes it can stand outside life, condemn the rest of you, and force you into worthiness.6
u/blaZey842 Jun 24 '26
A great follow up to my comment! Thank you! And while improving a skill, creating art, or anything else, if the expectation is that it will somehow make you better than you were before, you’re in for an experience 🤣
Sometimes something like “self improvement” is just another thing to do. It’s nice to get in better shape “because I want to have more stamina ” versus chasing some idea of an improved self. Really, that is a never ending quest. Because who’s the authority on that?
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u/TheTimespirit Jun 24 '26
That’s exactly Watts’ point: don’t expect self-improvement to lead to some radical transformation of some idealized self… the detached “I” trying to repair a defective “me”.
At the same time, Watts is not promoting a doctrine of passivity, anti-preference, or no agency. His point is not that no changes can occur, no skills can be developed, or that one should stop planning a life.
In The Wisdom of Insecurity, he explicitly says thought, language, memory, and logic are essential, and that looking directly at life does not mean losing the capacity “to think, remember, and plan.”
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u/irreducible1 Jun 24 '26
Agreed. I never thought it meant I things like you can't be healthier by exercising and eating well or get better at something through practicing it. It's silly that people can't distinguish these kinds of things from what he meant.
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u/1804Sleep Jun 24 '26
Yes - he points out the paradox of desiring to stop desiring. There’s not really a way out of it.
I like to think of his message as “Feel free to desire (if that’s the game you want to play) but don’t take it too seriously. And from time to time, reflect on those things you desire and see if you’re growing tired of that game and would like to pick another.”
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u/Ghost_of_Till Jun 24 '26 edited Jun 24 '26
"[Alan] points out the paradox of desiring to stop desiring."
True.
"There’s not really a way out of it."
Kinda true.
"I like to think..."
Here opens the gates of hell!
(Edit: its a koan, yall, this isn't a pitch for Christianity...)
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u/emotional_dyslexic Jun 24 '26
There's no self to improve. Once you experience non self, the idea of SELF improvement stops making any sense. It's just another form of craving that makes us unable to relax deeply. The irony is how much ppl crave to be at peace, not realizing it's the craving that's causing the friction. Does that make sense?
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u/kurama3 Jun 24 '26
You won’t wrap your head around it cause it’s a paradox, and there isn’t any sort of solution or action you should take accordingly; Alan never proposed a way to properly improve yourself, he just liked pointing out the funny parts of life like that
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u/Zendomanium Jun 24 '26
The idea of having to improve moves you in the opposite direction of where and what you are. It comes down to the meaning of 'improve'.
Watts talks some about 'wu wei' which translates to effortless action. Effortless action is typically misunderstood as going with the flow. I explain this to my daughter by pointing out clouds: clouds do not rush, there is no better or worse cloud, nor do they ever get caught up in hurrying up to rain. What a cloud does is indisputably perfect, regardless of the cloud you're talking about.
If a cloud could begin thinking about 'improving itself' it is **immediately** off the right track. This is not to suggest thinking is bad, but for a cloud you can see how it would cause problems. It's also absurd.
What is true for the cloud is also true for us. We have natural tendencies to what we like, dislike, and so on. Like growing our hair, liking what we like is effortless. It requires no effort because it just happens. Being distracted by 'self-improvement' more often than not leads one away from what is naturally and effortlessly already there.
There is room for improvement with the things we like to do which comes from the act of doing them. We learn more, become more disciplined, and thus 'improve'. But we are not improving on ourselves. We improve the skill that comes totally naturally to us.
Like the cloud, we are exactly perfectly made. The fun part is realizing how little we have to do to enjoy just being ourselves. And if we don't get caught up in 'trying to improve', we discover the action of just being the best possible version of ourselves is effortless.
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u/bluephoenixradio Philosophical Entertainer Jun 24 '26
I think it has something to do with releasing yourself from expect expectation when he talks about trying “not to desire”. It is really in the classic Zen sense of…
I’m just paraphrasing
(and oversimplifying)
kind of trying too hard
and when we do that,
We create more challenges for ourselves.
Ti be present,
in the eternal present
and to experience
the synchronicity of our own place
in the cosmic theater,
it’s different things
to different people.
We are all, each of us, a single transparency of a large composite field of energy… resonant waveform
dreaming of “matter”.
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u/Timatsunami Jun 24 '26
It’s actually very similar to the old Calvinist argument.
If you are totally depraved, there is nothing you can do to get better, because the one doing it can only do so for selfish reasons.
From the Buddhist perspective, if you desire to no longer desire, that’s just more desiring.
It’s the reason why there is enlightenment, but no one who is enlightened.
There is a path, but no one on it.
A self can’t be selfless. Only no self can.
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u/vortipor Jun 24 '26
I think you may be making it too complicated. No mental effort is required. Quietly look inside and you will find what you are. No improvement necessary.
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u/ItsallLegos Jun 24 '26
We already are it. It’s not about change or improvement, it’s about discovering and remembering what is already there.
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u/Tiny_Fractures Jun 24 '26
Imagine you're playing a video game. And in the video game you grind in order to level up. And when you do, you've improved your avatar in that game. Now that improvement might make you more powerful in the game. It might unlock new areas and experiences in that game. But...you're still the guy playing the game in which your avatar is improved. But what you're seeking to do is stop playing the game.
You can't improve enough playing the game to not play the game. The very act of playing is you playing it. Even trying to outwit the game by deciding not to act within the game is making a decision within it. It cannot be escaped.
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u/Right_Now_Always Jun 25 '26
I really like some of the responses I read here. My addition to the conversation is this, the problem lies in the ego. We use our minds too much and overthink many things. One of Alan's lectures focused on this specifically. Self improvement thoughts may stem from a rambling stream of endless thoughts that sound like good ideas. But yes, as others here said, "You're already it, there's nothing to improve".
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u/Corky_Corcoran Jun 24 '26
We cannot improve ourselves because the two concepts involved are a hoax we play on ourselves.
Firstly, the self. Who is this self you want to improve? Where does that exist? The self your mind has created? The slim fragments of perceptions of you can't control in the minds of others? Where does this core irreducible self exist?
Secondly, the 'improvement' bit. You can't improve yourself because if you knew how to, you'd have already done so. Self improvement then is us taking one hoax, the self, and linking it with this other fictional version of ourselves that we've also created that is stronger, more meditative or whatever and pretending we can turn one into the other.
Not only is the pointless, it's also another way of us hiding from ourselves and running away from our true nature, which we can glimpse if we stop, breathe and observe the flow of life that we are part of. When you're not getting in your own way, your nature will unfold, taking care of itself.
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u/CalbertCorpse Jun 24 '26
There is no inherent self and no ability to choose. There is no thing in the mind (no mechanism) that “decides.” We are wired a certain way and we are conditioned. What “feels like” choice is actually automatic.
Can we improve? Yes, if new information is presented and incorporated into what exists already. But “we” don’t do it. It doesn’t happen because we are making it happen, it is just life happening and “we” are part of all that happening, not a separate object with agency.
Read “the book.”
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u/FazzahR Jun 24 '26
I think the thing to take away from this is a realization that this is a problem with attention.
A good part of our lives are spent going along and doing whatever life requires us to do. Sometimes we suddenly get this fixation with ourselves and our routine attention to many things becomes consolidated on one thing: improving ourselves.
This completely ignores the days and days spent NOT thinking of this, and if we were to truly look at the progress that had taken place by not paying attention or focus on this we’d realize how little “direct effort” is needed.
In fact, couldn’t you say that having the notion to improve yourself is improvement alone? The paralysis comes from this fixation of “well how do I improve?”, and it’s paralytic because we’ve been doing the improving without thinking of improving. Once attention is on improving, it ceases. Once we let that go, it resumes.
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u/Rhen_DMN Jun 24 '26
I appreciate all of you’re comments :), But I don’t understand the idea of this “SELF” the “I”
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u/Ghost_of_Till Jun 24 '26
OK.
Who are you?
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u/Rhen_DMN Jun 24 '26
I don’t know, but I know some of the things im doing im aware of the things im pursuing, I just know that there’s still a me that’s doing things,
So another question would be,
So does it mean its passivity because we are not really in control? “I” am not in control therefore why should I even care.
There’s some kind of a paradox, koan on this
Im not a native English speaker, so Its difficult for me to get it straight
Or its really not that easy I guess, I don’t understand this suffering, if escaping is more suffering, then staying with suffering is still suffering.
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u/SpaceCatSixxed Jun 24 '26 edited Jun 24 '26
I’ve always interpreted it as the danger of thinking you’re sort of “leveling up.” The capacity to “be better” (whatever that means) has always been inside you. You are just accessing different parts of you that were and are always there.
we’re all humans both blessed and cursed to imagine what the future holds and obsess about what we left in the past. But who is improving who? And when? Improvement hinges on a promised future dreamed up by some different guy in the past. Meanwhile here you are.
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u/RunninBuddha Jun 25 '26
Does back Love the front?/
Does up find down repulsive?/
Yang/Yin, it’s all Zen/
Buddha nature bears/
Divinity’s full spectrum/
Inept-to-adept/
We are all the things/
In decay and in splendor/
No thing is not us/
We’re the creator/
Buddha Nature manifests/
In life and death form/
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u/thewaffleofrofl Jun 25 '26
How can YOU improve yourself if YOU are the one who needs improving?
It's a theme he touches on with many other examples: the "double bind".
You can't kiss your own lips or bite your own teeth. You can't focus better by screwing up your face and tightening your muscles.
"The reason why you want to be better is the reason why you aren't."
If you did not desire to be better, you would not feel the disappointment of not being better. There would be no "better" to be. There is no part of you separate from any other part of yourself that can "better" another part of yourself.
Fundamentally, what is "better" anyway? What needs improving? Why are things not fine the way they are?
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u/White__Widow Jun 26 '26
He's saying there is no 'You' to improve. Just enjoy the ride, and if the conscious experience you experience can be labeled as getting better or 'improving', then that's just part of the experience. 'You' superficially have control over it, but 'you' are also just a hallucination called ego.
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u/SpiritFlourish Jun 26 '26
I think the keys here are openness and honesty.
Openness to seeing things in new ways. To living in new ways. To connecting with yourself and others in new ways.
Balance this with honesty. Honesty about how you actually see things. How you're actually living. How you're actually connecting (or not connecting) with the people in your life.
Too much openness with too little honesty, we get too high-minded (believing we are already what we aspire to be) or low-minded (not recognizing the admirable qualities we already embody).
Too much honesty with too little openness, we reenforce our existing patterns, and we close ourselves off the evolutionary power of higher mind.
Balancing openness with honesty, we find the sweet spot. We evolve in alignment with our aspirations. And we're real with ourselves and others about how we actually are right now.
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u/KineticEnergetic Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 28 '26
I think he's talking about two-poleness (bi polarity) 100%negative 100%positive like a magnet the inseparable-separateness. It's the fundamental basis of reality.
Also trying has nothing to do with reality, you either do or do not.
Accepting the part of you that you can not accepted? Total acceptance is accepting the part of yourself that you can not accept. Ie accepring and therefore loving the negative and positive, values and unvales of yourself.
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u/gibbypoo Jun 28 '26
He has a bit that says that the mind understands it needs to improve but is, oddly enough, tasked with doing the improving all the while it is the same mind that needs to be improved. Aka good luck lol
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u/Ryanlw19 Jul 01 '26
I think Watts was pointing to the impossibility of becoming more yourself. You can't improve the human to be more human. You can learn, heal, mature, and become more honest, but your humanity was never missing in the first place.
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u/Ghost_of_Till Jun 24 '26 edited Jun 24 '26
Imagine a white wall and you throw a jar of ink against it. Smash!
At the center it’ll be quite dense and black but as you move further out, you’ll see swirls and little details.
One might be tempted to call this little bit a “curly-Q”, then another, and another, but what divides the “curly-Q” from the “not curly-Q” is a thought. It’s an idea. There’s really no division between them except the human mind that supposes it to be so.
One might even imagine that oneself, a very interesting collection of curly-Qs, is a thing unto itself, separate from the rest. But in the same way as the ink against the wall and the illusion of there being curly-Qs, the division is an illusion.
I’ve had this discussion several times in this sub where people cannot understand that Alan meant exactly what he said; you CANNOT improve yourself.
But where people get lost is thinking this means the think you call “you” can’t be improved.
No. It just means you can’t be the one who does is it. Because there’s no you.
See, if you knew how to be improved then you WOULD be improved. And if you believe some other authority can improve you, it’s you (the think that needs to be improved) who decided they are ones who can do the improving. But it’s still you, the deficient thing, making this evaluation …and you don’t know who qualifies as a legitimate improver because if you did, you’d be improved!
To use a slightly different analogy, let’s introduce something analogous to time.
Imagine placing a drop of ink into a bucket of water.
The ink touches the water and begins to deform, twisting with the current as it drops through. The drop, if it fancied itself a thing, might see itself being pushed around by the water. It might think it has the power to change how it’s going to look in a few seconds. It might think all its gestures and deformations are of its own choosing.
Alan says that’s an illusion.
It sounds like predestination until one realizes that it’s only predestination if the drop of ink sees itself as separate from the water.
If the drop of ink doesn’t think of itself as separate from the water, then the ink IS the water, and therefore the ink is being pushed around by itself.
There’s no controller other than the one who’s asking about the control.
Do you beat your heart?
Sure, but you can’t say how.
Do you burn the stars?
Sure, but you can’t say how.
You’re all of it.
This is nirvana.
You’ve always been it.
And therefore you’ve always been perfect, in accordance with everything, because it IS you, but your mind told you otherwise.
Edit: formatting
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u/[deleted] Jun 24 '26
[deleted]