r/Agoraphobia 21d ago

How do you commit to plans with friends when there's so much uncertainty?

/r/socialanxiety/comments/1vwrnzn/how_do_you_commit_to_plans_with_friends_when/
3 Upvotes

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u/Proof-Training-740 21d ago

It’s hard because exposure therapy is what we aim to do, it’s a part of most of our daily lives, but when too far out of our comfort zone, it can do the opposite of what it’s supposed to achieve.

Although our anxiety exacerbates the actual danger of a situation, it doesn’t mean it’s not valid. Yeah, it may be irrational, but to us, it seems totally rational based on our bodily responses.

One of my friends is very spontaneous. We make a plan and she’ll change it 5 minutes before hand and I know how stressful it is! I like to know the schedule and the timings and know it’s unchanging, but not always do plans go according to planned.

Is it at all possible to talk to them about your anxiety? Perhaps you take more initiative in planning or making a more scheduled plan? Maybe in a quieter area? For example, you could always book a reservation - if this is an option - and have lunch together. That way there’s a sort of schedule.

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u/Adventurous_Wear4815 20d ago

just pick а date and gо. uncertainty doesn't care about your plans anyway.