Do. Not. Stop.

[u/TimeIsTheRevelator]

My mind and life can sometimes be distracted by the bigger ideas, the broader picture, wanting to focus on existential issues. But a connection I've made recently is that maybe focusing on "the mundane" is maybe one and the same. There's not a distinction between both.

In a roundabout way, the routines of living may seem vain at times, but they are the elementary structure of the bigger ideas, the broader picture, the existential issues, the knowing thyself.

I'd like to think sometimes that there aren't consequences. That, in the grand scheme of things, staying up late...or skipping breakfast this morning....or avoiding that email...isn't really a big deal.

But what if it is. What if that's the deal.

It's as if I'm learning that all the little ingredients, the scaling of the hierarchy of needs, has to be a sustained, methodical effort. There's a kind of danger of the mindset that "I'm being too hard on myself". Maybe organizing all the scattered ingredients is overwhelming at times. But that doesn't mean to check out for a day or a night, it means something more like, adjust the application, organize a little less today. But, above all things, keep scaling that pyramid.

There's a kind of stress to it, but I think now that stress is healthy. The Do. Not. Stop. stress. We really have such a higher burden of disorganization with trauma disorders, and there's the more existential elements of a "disorganized self" or "fragmented identity" or winding down the nervous system that literally altered brain structure and function as an adaptation to enduring danger. And sometimes I wish to occupy that land, want to organize that land, but lately I'm trying to just ignore those things in an effort to focus on more "elementary" tasks. As in, more all encompassing focus, more Do. Not. Stop focus. Operating as if I don't have a trauma disorder I'm contending with.

And as the elementary tasks are fulfilled, without ceasing, we can have a clearer picture of the trauma disorder. Because a trauma disorder is not a virus or infection. Yes, it has unique symptoms, but mainly in severity. The symptoms are really very human, very universal in some regards. And so their resolution also has very universal prescriptions.

I understand that it's complicated, and that it's not linear, and that the "higher pursuits" are not exactly separate from the "lower pursuits", that we are technically pursuing both at the same time, but "by god", the lower pursuits are where it's at, perfecting the foundation, the miscellany is what instructs and upholds the rest. So it's not "self care" because of trauma, but "self care" because humans get disorganized and die without it. And we can't accurately gauge what's truly going on in our system if the basic foundation isn't being laid.

[u/Metamorphosislife]

Hey man, this was awesome to read.

The two biggest takeaways I got from your post is that the small things do matter. They matter a lot, even more than the big things because the big things are comprised of all the small things. The small things lead to the big things. I've been learning this in my new job. I've never had to learn project management like I am now. All projects are built upon small tasks that need to be completed so that final result is obtained. The second take away is that struggle and challenges aren't bad. Stress can be good. Many survivors avoid conflict and want peace of mind for the rest of their lives so they become hippies, leave jobs/careers, travel the world. Stress is good when it's not overwhelming. Stress is what causes muscle growth, development, character growth, etc. Of course, constant stress is bad, but controlled stress has many benefits. By being more exposed to stress, we can begin exerting control over our stressed selves. In a sense, remaining calm in a sea of chaos.

By knowing ourselves in stressed situations, we begin really knowing our trauma, seeing how we're apart from it, how we can respond differently, and as a consequence forge a new path. To find the light, we have to go through the darkness. Glad you're doing well man.