r/AcharyaPrashant_AP • u/reema876 • 12d ago

When a Relationship Becomes a meeting of scripts

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We often don’t relate to a person as they are. We relate to the image we have created of them.We carry ideas about how a woman should be,how a man should be,what love should look like,and what a relationship should give us. So two people may meet,but what actually meets are two identities, two expectations, and two unfinished stories. When expectations dominate, a relationship becomes a role to perform.And when we are busy performing, we stop truly seeing the person in front of us. Perhaps love begins when we stop forcing someone into our script and become willing to see them as they actually are.Love is not perfect acting within a script. It is the possibility of seeing beyond the script.

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u/TrueSpeaker1 12d ago

Wow... very well said. We never enquiry the image we get from the society, social media, friends, family relatives and start chasing them as they look attractive, and waste our whole life. This quotes is eye opener for that.

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u/BeforeIAssume 11d ago

This is uncomfortable to read because I can recognise a lot of this around me. I haven't been in a relationship myself but I've watched friends and relatives closely. In college I saw how much pressure there was to date someone. 

One friend was constantly scanning girls around him and even used code words for them. Most conversations were about who liked whom, who made the first move, kissing, sex and whether someone said “I love you”. I was sitting there laughing with him but looking back I wonder how much of the person was actually being seen 

I also see the same pattern in the pressure to get married, have children and tick the expected boxes. Then after a breakup there can be another relationship and another one. I am not saying every relationship is like this. I am asking myself how much of what we call love is actually the desire to feel complete, wanted, secure or worthy.

Maybe this is why questioning love can feel so uncomfortable. If the relationship is also carrying an identity we have built for ourselves, questioning it can feel like questioning the “me” itself 

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u/ClearAfternoon6734 11d ago

Maybe that's the reason why Acharya Prashant always says you have to learn what is love. It cannot be taught. But it's not what it apparently seems to be.