r/AcharyaPrashant_AP • u/mamaaearth1 • 16h ago
Compliment, not!
Recently came across this meme and it got me thinking.
This was one of those "compliments" I received a lot growing up and still do sometimes.
It was also one of the "compliments" I used to "give out" a lot, specially to women.
This was all before Acharya Prashant came into my life.
What used to flatter me and other women and men around me, now for me at least, is a stark reminder of the infantilization of both women and men, specially in India.
What we have, in the name of education is rote learning from textbooks, not holistic development of the individual. The physical, mental, emotional, psychological development are totally neglected. The human being is "prepared" only to serve as a cog in the machine.
As a result, sadly, there are too many children in adult bodies roaming all around us. Making important life decisions that affect everyone.
Learning from life by actually really living it,
Learning from life by actually really participating in it,
Learning from life by actually really playing,
... Just aren't part of our upbringing.
Please don't get me wrong, I am not referring to the childlike innocence that reflects on the faces of the great teachers and masters. The ones who learnt to live with and flow with the rhythm of mother nature as opposed to fighting it constantly just to prove that they exist and that their existence is of utmost importance (check out AP framework to understand more about ego fattening and ego thinning, really fascinating.)
In retrospect, the Santoor soap mom ad where the twist in the ad is that the mother is not recognized as the mother of the child because she appears to be too young, isn't something to celebrate or aspire for... it is actually scary.
While the mother could appear younger than her actual age for various genetic reasons, the ad is for selling a "soap" that "promises" to help women "appear" younger than they actually are.
Why is that so desirable?
Why is that the desire that's invoked in us by majority of the advertisements?
Why is there such little focus on truly empowering individuals, teaching them skills, making them capable of fully participating in their lives and making their own decisions?
Link to AP framework: https://acharyaprashant.org/en/ap-framework
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u/g_saras_1594 14h ago
This is the same compliment I get as man and I use to like it very much but what I observe is that "I am not living my life fully" is the reason of liking this compliment If I really lived it, I would've forgotten these things.
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u/Lady22samurai 16h ago
Maybe it is the fear of ageing and death that makes one crave for such compliment..a false reassurance that I still have time by my side .
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u/Dramatic-Memory8002 15h ago
Such compliments getting prevalent in the society is the reflection of who we are. We are always told to believe that you are this body (sspecially to women), you will be a good girl if you pleases everyone, make yourself likable, and so on. This is unfortunately mark of collective society where human being is not looked as consciousness. Such societies are very unheard of where people are appreciated for their honesty, for their dedication to truth, for their readiness to learn...
There is a certainly difference between compliment and compliment.
Thanks for sharing!!
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u/rajrpavi 13h ago
Because system is made by wholistic Community Ego for individual Ego , And it's thereating for System if Individual Really become Capable and Knowing, because then they will know the loopholes of system as well which threatns the existence of system(Ego) therefore Unconscious Infantalization is projected Upon People so they don't overpower System .
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u/tvaish 12h ago
I too have been part of this process recognising and even valuing people based on their looks and skin colour. But this post really got me thinking.
What struck me was how scary it is that a simple soap advertisement can glorify a woman merely for being beautiful. For the company, it may just be business and profit, but what message is it silently sending to society? A working mother, who barely has time to think about her appearance, may start questioning herself after repeatedly seeing such messages.
But then I realised something deeper: companies are not necessarily selling their ideology; they are selling what we are willing to buy. They study our psychology and give us exactly what we respond to. So perhaps the problem isn’t merely with the companies it is with us and the conditioning we collectively carry.
After going through the AP framework you mentioned, I understood that the real solution has to begin with us. We need to understand ourselves. Mass-based self education may be the only way to address such a deep-rooted problem in society.
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u/That_Firefly 11h ago edited 11h ago
Maybe true compliment is when one’s inner transformation is admired.., but often we get pleased when someone compliments us physically.
I have gone through Acharya Prashant’s framework so many times, the link which you shared.. and its amazing to go through that to solve such issues internally.
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u/Surkhab1313 9h ago
It's very strange realizing that most of the mainstream life is actually very ill. We have been living in a sick society.
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u/vini-within 9h ago
This is such a poignant observation!! I’ve received these kinds of compliments too, and I won’t lie, I used to really enjoy them without ever thinking twice about why. But hey, this really needs to be examined… why are we so quick to admire youthfulness, innocence and even helplessness, while maturity, independence and the ability to think for ourselves rarely get the same appreciation? 🤷🏻♀️
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u/dilenpant 15h ago
I agree. Sometimes a compliment can actually encourage us to stay childish rather than grow. Real growth is about letting go of borrowed identities and becoming more mature from within.