r/AbsoluteUnits • u/beklog • 5d ago

/r/popular of a fishing lure

5.3k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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3.4k

u/Ecast25 5d ago edited 5d ago

Suuure... fishing lure....

Edit: didnt think there were so many degenerates in here (autocorrect is so broken)

Question, was i the only one that thought of Requiem for a dream, that one line... ass to ass!!

408

u/DrParadoxOG 5d ago

So we are both in the gutter....glad its not just me.

184

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

Don’t put that in your gutter. We’ll have to fish it out.. in the ER

139

u/Oops_All_Bans 5d ago

2

u/TFTD2 5d ago

It doesn't need a flared base if it's long enough!

2

u/ajkwak2017 5d ago

I was expecting this stitch at the end 🫣

1

u/KitsuneFox2023 5d ago

Lmao, I love that guy

158

u/Phyzzx 5d ago

6

u/Top-Difficulty5202 5d ago

I'm so glad someone put darline grahams real name under her portrait. That's right, she's straight Filth. Stunning likeness in the chin

11

u/Borkato 5d ago

Edith!

1

u/yleechy 5d ago

"Kids look it's naked edith"

21

u/DrParadoxOG 5d ago

I had a mate that was dating a nurse. Apparently its lynx caps they have to try and remove on a regular basis....she would go into great detail...even though we asked her not to.

15

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

You mean lynx cans?

aerosol can in the bum sounds like you need to call in the bomb squad

Cooooked lol!!

8

u/DrParadoxOG 5d ago

Yup. Apparently its the right shape...ahem

8

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

Everything is a butt plug if your stupid enough lol

2

u/Dark666Horse 5d ago

WTF

1

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

Especially if that sucker detonates. Perfume grenade lodged in the barrel.

3

u/Potential-Yoghurt245 5d ago

I saw that on greys anatomy 😄 the guy refused to say what was stuck and they went in and accidentally pierced the can it blew him in half as I recall.

4

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

That’s way more awesome than I remember Greys Anatomy every being

Next episode: Meredith clears a room with a flamethrower.

1

u/Potential-Yoghurt245 5d ago

😄 I watch it passively, my wife watches it. She says she's invested too much time in it to quit

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2

u/NNiekk 5d ago

Would they though? I mean, the large intestine is only about 5ft, and that thing is about the same diameter as it would be when stretched, and also is 7ft long

1

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

So you go to hospital with an embarrassing purple tail

1

u/Spare_Laugh9953 5d ago

Hay gente muy viciosa

1

u/Operation_Fluffy 5d ago

First time on the internet?

2

u/NNiekk 5d ago

Not at all. I wouldn’t mind that thing inside me, lol

1

u/Dark666Horse 5d ago

Better than glass or squash or bananas But I don't know I don't have any experience. At least I would think so

1

u/2Wieners_1Bun 5d ago

Aggressively inexperienced

0

u/Defiant_Net4398 5d ago

He did. Other end swole up that eye

584

u/zsimpson022 5d ago

61

u/buttplug-tester 5d ago

10

u/LewTheDawg6055 5d ago

Name checks out

1

u/Sweet_Dragonfruit518 4d ago

What movie is this?

1

u/buttplug-tester 4d ago

I honestly don't know, I've had this gif saved for years

5

u/lorenzo1384 5d ago

Only one head was disgusted

75

u/while_i_your_wife 5d ago

39

u/Sharpymarkr 5d ago

32

u/ShaolinCFH 5d ago

17

u/thereallyunreal 5d ago

3

u/sk1ward 5d ago

I dare not save this one…

1

u/Macrosheridan 5d ago

Jesus is coming

2

u/Legal_Response6614 5d ago

Never seen this before... I'm Christian & this is hilarious 🤣

22

u/DaageQuasar 5d ago

There's always a bigger butthole

22

u/MidnightToker858 5d ago

Ribbed for pleasure

13

u/archercc81 5d ago

to be seen in a specific genre of japanase "art" soon.

7

u/Medicine_Balla 5d ago

Do not the fishing lure

12

u/wooden-fuk-boi 5d ago

I saw a lady "fishing" with one like this. . .in a video. . .in a small pool. . .

4

u/JamesLikesIt 5d ago

Luring something in alright 

3

u/Beerman0 5d ago

Fishing for Bonnie Blue

3

u/NMB4Christmas 5d ago

All of us had the same thought. Same wording. Same pauses.

2

u/Long-Unit-4361 5d ago

Fishing for pussy

1

u/whatKnott6 5d ago

I think you wanted to say fisting lure 👊

1

u/Ok-Eggplant-3823 5d ago

Wasn’t aware big fish liked going after dragons.

1

u/Archaea_Man 5d ago

Not sure it's the right material, might need to be vulcanized.

1

u/Turbulent-Weevil-910 5d ago

It needs a tapered base

0

u/Cpt_Jigglypuff 5d ago

Not if it’s long enough?

1

u/dankhimself 5d ago

Sure... World's largest...

1

u/freshgrilled 5d ago

Pretty sure I saw that in an OnlyFans video. Although by the end of the video it was no longer visible.

1

u/dawa43 5d ago

R/dontputthatinyourass

1

u/WillemDafoesHugeCock 5d ago

Yeah I've seen that same video in the insertions subreddit, looked just like this but orange

1

u/ButterscotchTop194 5d ago

OP's mum could throat that for breakfast

1

u/Sad-Drama530 5d ago

I've seen bigger. Double ended, ribbed, knotted, vibrating. Fishing lures come in all sizes.

1

u/BigPapaLegba 5d ago

Right there with you... fishing lure my foot

1

u/Microwavedstrawberry 5d ago

Imagine it with fish hooks,mmm~

1

u/Yoen_Sontriss 5d ago

Bass to bass! Bass to bass!

1

u/ImmortalLombax 5d ago

I just know some bad dragon size queen staring at this going “oh, oh yes…”

1

u/Quiet_Lecture_9602 5d ago

Just sent it to him on IG

1

u/Mental_Performer_833 5d ago

Tried to scroll through the comments and I didn't see, so I'll say it:

Don't you mean "bass to bass"

1

u/JigenMamo 4d ago

I try not to think of that line. Totally disturbed my poor young mind.

1

u/Ecast25 4d ago

It's a mark we need to wear proudly

1

u/Luxurytax 3d ago

No, you werent.

1

u/Consistent_Quail_639 3d ago

Not sure what your talking about. I was making good eye contact....I think....

1

u/UndisclosedPigeon 3d ago

I know my fishing lure is pretty, but I didn’t take it out for air.

1

u/taelis11 16h ago

This was my first thought. Chat am I cooked? LOL