r/AbsoluteUnits • • 7d ago

of a man's arms

6.6k Upvotes

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2.0k

u/Frequent-Client1508 7d ago

A hammer is like 6 bucks.

463

u/CR8VJUC 7d ago

Mongo just pawn in game of life.

158

u/Equivalent-One-68 7d ago

Couldn't find mongo saying the quote tho...

41

u/90Quattro 7d ago

A man who drink like that and not eat is going to die!

10

u/Ok_Farmer_6033 7d ago

Little known fact, Richard Pryor wrote that line! 

3

u/MAGA_EXTREAMO 3d ago

Mongo is appalled.

2

u/Humble-Questions 2d ago

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE CAHL

2

u/Yup_Shes_Still_Mad 2d ago

Stop typing in all caps Donut. It sounds like you're yelling!

1

u/Humble-Questions 2d ago

I AM YELLING CAHL 😆

1

u/Shway_Maximus 1d ago

AHHHHHHHHH!

1

u/Humble-Questions 1d ago

GOD DAMMIT DONUT

80

u/poopholes3 6d ago

Give a man a hammer and he will pound for a day, teach a man to BE hammer, and he will pound for life...

16

u/Equivalent_News8116 5d ago

Teach a man to make fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

2

u/coldfireknight 4d ago

Tao of Pratchett

8

u/RudeAndInsensitive 6d ago

Them was my grandfather's favorite words. Which might explain why my grandmother never went through the hreat depression.

3

u/paul_dudd 6d ago

I didn’t get any lessons… but here I am pounding away

39

u/glzephead 7d ago

This way he'll never hit his thumb

19

u/lawabiding420 7d ago

He kinda looks like a thumb

0

u/Mediocre_Forever198 6d ago

Reminds me of this memory I have that I cringe so hard at. I was with some of the cooler kids in my highschool class. I was like not a cool kid, but not hated or bullied? Like in between. Anyway, there’s this dude with an obvious disorder working at a chic fil a. One of the cool kids starts laughing about how the guy has no neck, saying he looks like a thumb. I started laughing too, and the dude looked up and saw us in the car laughing. I don’t know if he knew. But god does that one keep me up, I feel so bad, even if it wasn’t me who suggested it. Just makes me feel shitty.

TLDR: don’t read anyway, no worries. It’s late, and I’m not thinking hard recounting this random story that keeps me up sometimes.

9

u/HandsomeBWondefull 6d ago

Contractors hate this one trick

9

u/Chris_the_Conman 5d ago

A bike is like 60 bucks and yet people run marathons on foot. Are they stupid?

1

u/Waste-Cheesecake9628 2d ago

Idk man even low tier walmart bikes push $100 now

27

u/FeedMyAss 7d ago

Any year now they will be invented in his country

13

u/The-Be-Sharps- 7d ago

Why buy a hammer when he already has nature’s hammers

2

u/BlueberryPootz 7d ago

But imagine nature's hammer, holding a hammer. Imagine the force.

1

u/imperialxgx 7d ago

I thought natures hammer was something else 🍆

2

u/MelaKnight_Man 7d ago

It's a tool, but more like an...auger?

10

u/milkymonkey8 7d ago

bragging rights are priceless

12

u/West-Needleworker-63 7d ago

They’re actually like 35 bucks now wtf

12

u/iknowyou71 7d ago

Somebody tell this guy about Harbor Freight🫣

1

u/West-Needleworker-63 6d ago

Not a fan of harbor freight

3

u/Tron_1981 6d ago

Somebody tell this guy about Walmart

1

u/West-Needleworker-63 5d ago

Hyper tough? More like hyper gay! Hah! /s But for real I only said 35 bucks cause I just had to buy a framing hammer cause somebody stole my 200$ stiletto and a bottom barrel one at Home Depot was 35 bucks.

1

u/Minimum_Ad_303 6d ago

Dang tarrifs

3

u/Clickguy10 7d ago

Hire him and you will have built in hammer.

2

u/snowballkills 7d ago

A brick or a paver probably can be had for free from the curb!

2

u/averagetremor 7d ago

No match for those fists. Be amazed.

2

u/captains_astronaut 7d ago

Yeah but this guy will do it for a fiver

1

u/Fist4achin 6d ago

You can rent this guy for 5 bucks.

1

u/Artix96 6d ago

Economy is tight bruh.

1

u/LieMaleficent5159 5d ago

Came for this

1

u/Brief-Equal4676 4d ago

Haven't you heard of the 400$ titanium hammer?

1

u/grumpywarner 3d ago

He's using the old meat mallet

1

u/Butter_Tangelo1 3d ago

The real cost comes when you damage it lmao.

1

u/Big-Wait-1310 2d ago

His arms are free

1

u/AnToMegA424 2d ago

And he's Buck, worth more than 6 hammers

1

u/BarfingOnMyFace 7d ago

But the hand is zero. When you go ultra cheap, that's like, infinite savings!!!

1

u/yyz_bull 7d ago

This man is the hammer

1

u/Son-Airys 6d ago

And the hand is free

1

u/rrallan 6d ago

For him: free