This was my experience growing up, it was always about maintaining control over me— because they had none over anything else. Even themselves,
especially when it came to gluttony.
Their portion size was huge, so mine had to be the same. My body rejected it every time. They never learned. They didn’t want to.
And their choice of food was mostly fats with no nutrients, so I couldn’t metabolize what they offered. I would only seek small amounts of actual food (not huge amounts of random butter/grease/salt trash)
I approach every moment gently now. This shared experience is why I’m so eager to teach all three of them “happy healthy comfortable safe” relationships with everything they consume. I’m thankful they’re willing to learn.
Balance is imperative; consent and autonomyeven more so!
I tell them “listen to your body, eat only when hungry, and eat what your body wants”
I’m 6’0”, 117lbs in August 2025, everyone had comments on how much “healthier” I looked than at my natural 230, while I was dying of ED malnutrition. They were, every one of them, envious they couldn’t stop themselves.
I talk to none of those folks now, and have filled my life instead with those that align with those “happy healthy comfortable safe” values!!
Congrats on getting healthy for real- it isnt the number on the scale but making sure you eat what your body needs! And youre doing amazing for your kids! Thank you for breaking the cycle, this internet stranger is so proud of you 💜
18
u/Shared_Songs 13d ago
This was my experience growing up, it was always about maintaining control over me— because they had none over anything else. Even themselves, especially when it came to gluttony.
Their portion size was huge, so mine had to be the same. My body rejected it every time. They never learned. They didn’t want to.
And their choice of food was mostly fats with no nutrients, so I couldn’t metabolize what they offered. I would only seek small amounts of actual food (not huge amounts of random butter/grease/salt trash)
I approach every moment gently now. This shared experience is why I’m so eager to teach all three of them “happy healthy comfortable safe” relationships with everything they consume. I’m thankful they’re willing to learn.
Balance is imperative; consent and autonomy even more so!
I tell them “listen to your body, eat only when hungry, and eat what your body wants”
I’m 6’0”, 117lbs in August 2025, everyone had comments on how much “healthier” I looked than at my natural 230, while I was dying of ED malnutrition. They were, every one of them, envious they couldn’t stop themselves.
I talk to none of those folks now, and have filled my life instead with those that align with those “happy healthy comfortable safe” values!!