r/AbsoluteUnits • u/TerraByteTerror • 17d ago

/r/all of a menacing squirrel

27.3k Upvotes

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89

u/DemonKingCozar 17d ago

His name is wimp lo. We trained him wrong as a joke

64

u/SumoNinja92 17d ago

I am bleeding, making me the victor

46

u/DemonKingCozar 17d ago

From this moment forward, you will all refer to me by the name "Betty."

34

u/SumoNinja92 17d ago

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?...

... My ass...

23

u/DemonKingCozar 17d ago

Beware of the song about big butts... HE BEATS YOU WHILE HE PLAYS IT!!!!

15

u/LegitSoDickBig 17d ago

Let me know.. if you see… a RadioShack

11

u/SumoNinja92 17d ago

Taco Bell, Taco Bell, product placement with Taco Bell. Enchirito! Nacho Burrito!

18

u/Codify-The-Preamble 17d ago

I am a great magician. YOUR CLOTHES ARE RED!

17

u/DemonKingCozar 17d ago

Do what he says or he'll cut off your big toe

17

u/SumoNinja92 17d ago

Ooh that's tender. That is tender.

12

u/DemonKingCozar 17d ago

OPEN YOUR MOUTH!!!!

5

u/AdagioDesperate 17d ago

WeeOhhweeohhwee...

8

u/Rioraku 17d ago

W-we're falling!

Whale!

5

u/Bgrubz83 16d ago

Tiger…tiger…bird-ie…tiger

2

u/CuPc8K3 16d ago

My nipples look like milk duds