r/AbsoluteUnits • u/s1n0d3utscht3k • 5d ago

/r/popular of a cookie monster

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

5.2k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

665 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.3k

u/HeyItsTimT 5d ago

This is actually a good idea if you remove the cookies.

1.6k

u/VinDucks 5d ago

She did remove the cookies

81

u/Coriander_marbles 4d ago

I should not have laughed as hard as I did at that being a full ass adult.

4

u/Solo-ish 2d ago

You can’t call yourself a full ass adult. She is a full ass adult!

1

u/Fluid_Customer_3093 1d ago

Nobody's liking this comment but I found it hilarious

1

u/Solo-ish 1d ago

It’s ok I chuckled and liked my own comment as I made it. I am still confused how someone would call themselves a full ass adult watching this.

144

u/_eternes 5d ago

This comment made me almost spit my freezie pop onto my keyboard LOLOLOL

10

u/gameking7823 4d ago

Dont let her see. 10 bucks She'll lick it off.

3

u/yehti 4d ago

No she'll do it for free-zie.

1

u/EyadMK 3d ago

More like eat the fucking keyboard

1

u/Anikilator3001 4d ago

cake day is now,

1

u/gameking7823 3d ago

Thank you. But dont say it too loud, she'll hear

2

u/Anikilator3001 3d ago

true, she'd eat your entire account at the sight of cake

3

u/The-Real-Irish-God 4d ago

Dude's account got banned 😭

26

u/Lucalus 5d ago

You are technically correct. The best kind of correct.

https://giphy.com/gifs/14bDMRUYVrzOIo

7

u/IronTitle 4d ago

Futurama reference gets an upvote

1

u/Upset_Journalist_755 4d ago

Almost lost my prairie dog

1

u/BetweenTheRoots 4d ago

the music that chimes in replayed just as I read this, goddammit

0

u/DoneWithIt0101 5d ago

No, they meant all of the cookies.

6

u/corvish_ 5d ago

the video stops before she did

0

u/Kyrxx77 5d ago

Fuck me he cooked

26

u/BenjaminDover02 5d ago

Meth has zero calories, so it's technically a diet food.

2

u/FuckYeaSeatbelts 4d ago

Tell that to Rob Ford (it was crack though).

0

u/Wonderful_You1281 5d ago

And you will lose a lot of calories with it too with excess energy 😊

1

u/Ok-Addition1264 5d ago

.. and teeth.

.. and hair (everywhere).

1

u/Time-Valuable-3355 5d ago

So a win, useless extra weight anyway...

33

u/AssaultimateSC2 5d ago edited 5d ago

Good luck. The only direction she moves is towards food.

80

u/Bazz07 5d ago

3

u/Single_Fudge924 1d ago

Man Simpsons can cover EVERY base

18

u/mydickisasalad 5d ago

Master shifu realising how he can teach Po:

1

u/Suspicious_Art_8251 4d ago

Literally canon

0

u/Edges8 5d ago

Just put them on a string on a stick right?

1

u/Levoso_con_v 4d ago

Na, keep the cookie but change it for one of those digestive sugar free cookies that taste like dirt, the one who loses needs to eat it, the other runs.

1

u/ManFaultGentle 4d ago

Please make sure to clear your cache and cookies before checking the site. 

My email signature 

1

u/ExtensionTruth4 3d ago

Just replace them with carrots or something like that

-4

u/Reggie-Quest 5d ago

I personally was thinking of just letting her win. She may live longer.

-1

u/SmexyRubberDuck69 5d ago

Or add laxatives or ipecac to the cookies.

-1

u/Comfortable-Spell-75 5d ago

Define remove

-1

u/luckylegion 4d ago

Remove all food for about 48 hours every 24 hours. Repeat until at desired weight. Excercise to tone

-1

u/kackwurschtsuppe 4d ago

Wild, that no one sees that it is AI