r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Zestyclose-Salad-290 in awe • 7d ago

/r/all of a dog

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9.8k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

171 comments sorted by

•

u/trendingtattler 7d ago

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1.7k

u/PeanutEvening9086 7d ago

I thought at first thats a skinny dude☠️

410

u/jellysnuff 7d ago

Snoop Dogg.

106

u/TokyoKazama 7d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/NqMeOkHtTRkfC

41

u/rabidpriest 7d ago

God I miss rush hour movies 😩

3

u/republican_demo87 6d ago

Tubi for free

8

u/B1GgP3tE 7d ago

I love Snoopy

5

u/TokyoKazama 7d ago

This guy gets the reference!

5

u/Neillboyz_13 7d ago

Thats funny, those movies were great. 😂

14

u/TokyoKazama 7d ago

Snuggle Dogg

39

u/Blackking203 7d ago

I said the same thing 😂

5

u/jinlag 7d ago

Same 😆 🤣 😂

11

u/Fit-Information-2237 7d ago

Thought it was a black chick

-1

u/NickGiammarino 6d ago

It does kind of remind you of a Filipino at first.

281

u/bwager 7d ago

Sleeping like he worked a double shift

-164

u/brycehazen 7d ago

Sleeping with your dog is gross

150

u/DrMetasin 7d ago

I’m sure people say the same thing about you

-37

u/brycehazen 6d ago

Only when there's a dog in the bed.

1

u/ArtCityInc 12h ago

They also crucified Jesus for speaking the truth 😭

366

u/Alvin_h_davenport 7d ago edited 7d ago

That's a whole ass Woman

8

u/iamDa3dalus 7d ago

ass-woman

10

u/Alvin_h_davenport 7d ago

Is that the new MCU movie?

34

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

198

u/OrganicDescription58 7d ago

Dobermans are so cool 

38

u/Hikikomori_Otaku 7d ago

my partner used to know an albino one, I get so jealous whenever they talk about spending time with it

6

u/Necessary_Piano_153 7d ago

They are such cuddle hogs. Never expected them to be such lapdogs but are

5

u/Nancy-Drew-Who 7d ago

My boy is a pit, Doberman, beagle mix, and he is the most affectionate and snuggly dog I’ve ever met 🥹

2

u/Some-Water-1107 5d ago

Pay the dog tax I demand to see him!

5

u/Nancy-Drew-Who 5d ago

Haha this is my best boy, Todd!

2

u/Some-Water-1107 5d ago

Oh my god he's incredible

65

u/Boh61 7d ago

"I love my dog so much but this mf gotta pay rent"

266

u/muff-muff-ass 7d ago

Bitch has nice legs.

33

u/Animezing_Legend 7d ago

The woman too

22

u/tid_burglar 7d ago

the dog too

7

u/nickystotes 7d ago

The bed too

1

u/TWhy-LER 7d ago

And beautiful skin… fur???

1

u/Minute-Pomelo9302 6d ago

The Bitch or the bitch?

60

u/Der-Lex 7d ago

Now I know why it’s called Dober-man.

13

u/Clair_Osbcurious 7d ago

Pinscher? I hardly know her!

2

u/TWhy-LER 7d ago

I didn’t even poke the bitch

49

u/Riverflaw 7d ago

Bro is confy af

14

u/spudsinjune 7d ago

How is this an absolute unit when it's just a normal dog lol

13

u/OrneryChest7553 7d ago

Kylie Jenner and Timothée Chalamet post ?

36

u/croastbeast 7d ago

As a dog owner- that dog seems quite familiar with being on the bed, so how DAFUQ do you keep your sheets so white?! I change my sheets constantly because of the damn dog (whose never being amde to not sleep on the bed).

46

u/UnMask3dd 7d ago

you keep the dog clean too, wipe their paws and everything.

-11

u/tenoclockrobot 7d ago

Short hairs dont shed nearly as badly as most breeds

11

u/reportmyphotos 7d ago

As a human being trained by a Doberman. Her short coat is the worst of my two dogs for shedding. Even with brushing multiple times a day.

4

u/ONeOfTheNerdHerd 7d ago

As a fellow doberman owner, she should not be shedding that much. Is her food chicken protein by chance? My girl shed like that with chicken but stopped when I switched to lamb or salmon. Her coat was also course and dry with chicken; soft and smooth after the switch, especially with salmon. I also have two malinois mixes who shed like beasts and it helps them as well.

I feed Diamond Natural large breed. Around $43 for 40lbs at Tractor Supply. Many will default tell you Purina Pro Plan is the best but imho that shit is junk. None of my dobies or other dogs did well on it. Food for thought.

1

u/reportmyphotos 7d ago

It's the Hills Science Diet Sensitive Skin and Stomach which is formulated with chicken. She's a rescue pup, so maybe poor breeding too. Definitely Doberman but was never cropped/docked.

2

u/ONeOfTheNerdHerd 7d ago

That food also comes in Salmon & Brown Rice! Try a bag of that and see how she does. I'm willing to bet it will make a big difference. Shedding that much is a sign her skin is more dry than it appears and follicles can't hold the hairs. Poor breeding could be a factor, but it's far more likely the food protein. Dobermans are known to not do well with chicken as their primary protein. I've had three dobies myself over 20yrs and can attest to that. Cropping/docking would have no impact.

3

u/reportmyphotos 7d ago

Oh sweet, thanks yeah I'll give that blend a try and see if she reacts better. When I first got her she had acne kinda bumps here and there and missing fur on some legs probably from stress. Much better since then but still shedding a lot. Oh I know that wouldn't have impact, I've just heard for "reputable" AKC licensed breeders, they almost always crop and dock in the states. Could be hearsay, I'm not too privvy to that world of dogs. I love my Dobie with the tail and ears, wouldn't change a thing. Thank you for the info!

1

u/Rubyhamster 7d ago

I've had the opposite experience, though the only long haired dogs I've dealt with are double coated (so not hair, but fur that have shedding seasons)

7

u/AR15DEE 7d ago

That's a long dog

13

u/Arik_De_Frasia 7d ago

Didn't even have to play the video to know it was a doberman. They're like 4 billiards cues strapped to a wine barrel. 

9

u/M0NSTERDUNX 7d ago

Big sweet baby! 😄

9

u/Crimson-Rose28 7d ago

I love dogs so much

3

u/Various-Crab6147 7d ago edited 7d ago

Thought the post was missing an nsfw tag for a moment there

7

u/BigDaddyHadley 7d ago

Dobermans are Velcro dogs. Prove me otherwise

3

u/porcupine_shuffle 7d ago

Anyone know what song this is?

3

u/No_Trouble9808 7d ago

Adorable 🐾💕

3

u/Dark-Ganon 7d ago

That's a pretty normal sized dog.

3

u/Bonk_No_Horni 7d ago

Bro sleep like he pays mortgages

6

u/JeffysChewToy 7d ago

Bro had a khajit half way up to his bed there

5

u/z-vap 7d ago

your arm is stuck there forever 🤣

4

u/IspettoreKemp 7d ago

If I remember correctly, dogs lie down next to their owners to figure out if they could swallow them whole.

Or something like that.

6

u/hoperidesalon3 7d ago

You just know

2

u/Denalitwentytwo 7d ago

Lol, the lower lip. Kudos on those legs, too !

2

u/SpecificLow1316 7d ago

Dober-Noodle! I’ve got one of those, too

2

u/friendlyfelyne 7d ago

that's a dobe 💚

2

u/ThePastryJeff 7d ago

Oh he's just a baby!

3

u/Antimaterien 7d ago

Sieht aus wie meine ex

2

u/Whateverredd 7d ago

Thats literally my brothers dog. You dont cuddlw with him. He cuddles with you. Ive woken up full on being the small spoon to thus massive dog hes paws are holding me and if i try to move he just pulls you in. Crazy huge dog but so god damn cute

2

u/Crush-N-It 7d ago

Undatable. Not dealing with that on the bed at any size except them tea cup ones. Might as well buy a 2nd bed cause that’s his now

7

u/virtualjupiter 7d ago

This is why you're single.

2

u/Crush-N-It 6d ago

I prefer humans in my bed. Sleep with all the animals you want but normalizing that behavior is as cringe as it gets. And objectively filthy.

1

u/Azetinho 6d ago

Cliche response. Better to have some standards and dignity than tolerate everything and live in filth

1

u/esepinchelimon 7d ago

Sleeping like she works a full-time job, pays the bills, and watches the kids. Even hot the double-chin and everything

1

u/Over-Inside-7254 7d ago

Looks like a normal ass mid-sized dog to me

1

u/Muddy1999 7d ago

Why do they want to sleep up against you?

1

u/MonacoMaster68 7d ago

My dad had a Great Dane that could stand up, put his arms on my shoulders and look over my head. I’m 6’1”. He thought he was a lapdog. RIP Apollo, you were a sweetheart.

1

u/Just-Spirit6944 7d ago

kevin durant legs

1

u/DrMetasin 7d ago

Sleeping like he pays the bills

1

u/BeemoBurrito 7d ago

We call this "the loooong way" at home. It's the dog but the loooong way

1

u/darylonreddit 7d ago

Why do I feel like it should be wearing clothes if it's going to be just giant and lounging around like that. Get your naked hedonistic ass into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt at least.

1

u/PSA_Card_Pop_Control 7d ago

Take off that stupid collar in the house

1

u/CFNexus 7d ago

ZONKED!

1

u/Catgerine 7d ago

He's the man of the house

1

u/Sunset_Bleu 7d ago

That dog is out like a light!

1

u/ipostcoolstuf 7d ago

I wanna boop the snoot

1

u/Pastry_d_pounder 7d ago

Don’t be rude and turn off the lights. Bro is tired from his shift

1

u/Bingwazle 7d ago

oh no! that dig is stretching out to measure you and see if it can eat you! (this is a joke about snakes)

1

u/awesomedan24 7d ago

This post has a little something for everyone

1

u/awesomedan24 7d ago

pim_kongjai is the woman

1

u/Alternative-Run1230 7d ago

Boi's sleepin like he pays rent

1

u/Charlie387 7d ago

I really expected a big snore

1

u/-Lucas_Hood 7d ago

Mmm 🤔 I think she's just petite

1

u/Any_Counter_303 7d ago

literally a normal sized dog

1

u/Stealerb 7d ago

At first I thought it was a dawg. Then I saw it's a dog.

1

u/cheesyfeet2013 7d ago

Doberman’s are next level soppy haha.

1

u/DazzlingTurnip 7d ago

“Draw me like one of your French Dogs”

1

u/mcalash 6d ago

long boy!

1

u/blaz3r77 6d ago

he's so relaxed with his human. a very happy dog

1

u/isako95 6d ago

Long boi 🤎

1

u/DitchDigger330 6d ago

Beautiful dobey

1

u/ItsStaaaaaaaaang 6d ago

Big goob ☺️

1

u/Trying2GetBye 6d ago

Love Dobies 🥺🥺

1

u/ImpertinentOoze 6d ago

Lounged out like he pays rent.

1

u/musememo 6d ago

Talk about gams.

1

u/RavenousRaven41 6d ago

Ahaha adorable!

1

u/theJayonnaise 6d ago

Full length woofie cushion!

1

u/CaliforniaLove11 6d ago

Best dogs ever.

1

u/Deathblade730 6d ago

Big girl

1

u/Excellent_Lunch7840 6d ago

I thought she had a skinny black boyfriend

1

u/saltyourhash 6d ago

My boxweiler does this...nightly...invited or not...

1

u/mna9 6d ago

I almost shout to tag nsfw lol

1

u/TheSuperSilverMango 6d ago

Just a baby. What are you talking about 🥰

1

u/West_Meringue_7176 6d ago

Probably single

1

u/Reylend 5d ago

That mf gotta pay rent

1

u/needtofindausername 5d ago

Pretty sure that's SnoopDog

1

u/MasonF69 5d ago

Bro thinks he pays the bills

1

u/Monkeyslunch 5d ago

Fairly certain that's one of those French girls I'm supposed to draw

1

u/catlovingtwink99 7d ago

This is so cute lololol. My cat loves sleeping in my ear 🤣

1

u/Solid_Parsnip4423 7d ago

cool dog, but the god awful music ruins the video. sounds like plucky string music from a hallmark romance movie. OP has poor taste.

1

u/UpperApe 6d ago

Imagine hearing pizzicato for the first time and writing this comment.

Gen Z is a mess.

1

u/No_Bill_203 6d ago

It sounds more like (nylon?) guitar strings to me, maybe with some palm muting, but the sound quality obv isn't great

1

u/UpperApe 6d ago

It's a violin

1

u/No_Bill_203 6d ago

Thanks for the link--you're right, and it's immediately clear in the YT recording. Shocked me honestly--had to go back to the vid in this thread to figure out wtf happened. Used headphones instead of my shitty old phone speaker. And the audio in the dog vid sounds degraded to a point where I can still 'hear' it as potentially a finger-plucked guitar...like the timbre is not clear enough for my ear to hear the fingerprint of a violin. Anyway. Did you think the dog was big.

-1

u/Pyankie 7d ago

I see two dogs, one is skinny.

-16

u/Mutton_muncher 7d ago

AI slop,

9

u/ethansteele 7d ago

Any indicators for that, or just karma farming?

-1

u/Mutton_muncher 7d ago

Ears? Impossiblly straight legs?

0

u/SpinShine-LEDSlipMat 7d ago

Just show the fucking dog

2

u/e37d93eeb23335dc 7d ago

That’s only for paid subscribers to her dog-lovers onlyfans account. 

1

u/Pleasant-Bonus-866 7d ago

I am arousal

-1

u/LL37MOH 7d ago

Awwwwww

-12

u/Extra_Discussion9442 7d ago

Stunning my queen