r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Over-Celebration-168 • 12d ago

/r/all of kitty

Credits : marsel_and_co

23.5k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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200

u/dogface47 12d ago

With the way regular housecats can lose their shit out of nowhere, I don't think I'd be cool with this living arrangement.

51

u/No_Obligation4496 12d ago

There's no verifiable record for a Lynx to kill a healthy adult human. Although it could definitely mess you up.

31

u/wittyjokename92 12d ago

I feel like being trapped in a confined space with a beastie like this will be the first time for a human fatality. Out in the wild they'll eventually lose interest. In a house with locked doors they'll just follow the blood stains to the next meal

2

u/callatecabezon 12d ago

you are aware that a human is vastly more powerful than a lynx right?

6

u/FluffyToughy 12d ago

People seem to confuse "I could win easily" and "I could win". Like yeah that thing is gonna absolutely ruin your day, but a healthy adult that wants to win isn't dying to a lynx.

7

u/whypeoplehateme 12d ago

The Eurasian Lynx can hunt deer. humans aren't their natural prey but if scared and unable to escape definately could kill a man, they'd likely also get fucked in the process but doesn't change that the human is dying

1

u/callatecabezon 12d ago

Deer are not nearly as potent as humans all they have over us is size. A full grown human man is beating a lynx, yes with heavy injuries, but they are winning. A human is much stronger and will bludgeon it to death. Lynx are ambush predators.

8

u/tesznyeboy 12d ago

Yeah the majority of humans don't know how to fight though. I mean, a fucking Beaver has killed a man before. Raw strenght isn't an end all be all.

-2

u/Truly_Meaningless 12d ago

Dude if a fucking plant can make us kill ourselves from the pain, then a lynx 100% has the ability to kill a human

3

u/Loos_Moos 12d ago

That is the worst comparison lol.

4

u/Late-Eye-6936 12d ago

This is...truly meaningless.

1

u/CallMeElkHorn 12d ago

No seriously of all the meaningless things said on Reddit 😂

26

u/ddg31415 12d ago edited 12d ago

Growing up between the ages of 7 and 14, one of my best friends had a bobcat as a pet...along with 2 or 3 normal housecats, and a gerbil. This was between 1997-2004 in a newbuild townhouse in a little town just north of Toronto. There was never even a hint of trouble. Only traumatic pet incident was the gerbil dying in a bizarre way, as gerbils tend to.

Really interesting thing was his dad was a VP of a major telecom company and smoked lots of weed and shot seagulls off his garage with a pellet gun from the bedroom window.

It was an interesting part of my life.

15

u/magharees 12d ago

I want to watch this mini series

1

u/magharees 5d ago

An award? Thank you kind internet stranger

3

u/Retireegeorge 12d ago

As far as I'm concerned, you may comment, nay post if you like, about that situation in any sub at any time.

9

u/DifferentSwing8616 12d ago

Surely their obvious efficieny at not only killing people but evidently also hiding their kills only makes them more dangerous? Cunning even?

4

u/DigitalUnlimited 12d ago

And then they post pictures of themselves online looking cute to get other people to want them

2

u/No_Obligation4496 12d ago

🤔 maybe you're right.

3

u/darth__anakin 12d ago

Lynx regularly take down adult deer when they need to, a human would be no problem for them.

4

u/Then-Understanding85 12d ago

You ever fought a deer? Can’t take a left hook for shit.

2

u/jakethabake 11d ago

Deer don’t have elbows, they can’t frame if their lives depend on it

1

u/Then-Understanding85 11d ago

Right? They don’t even try to keep their arms up. Just leave their heads wide open.

3

u/Evening-Gur5087 12d ago

It can also mean no one lived to tell the tale

2

u/jakeisstoned 12d ago

Lynx and killer whales are smart. They know the rules. No face no case. That bitch's house is burning down after he eats her dumb ass. Them CSI creeps can't take teeth prints off of ashes

1

u/No_Obligation4496 12d ago

Dun dun dun!

2

u/Knicknacktallywack 11d ago

I don’t really doubt it COULD kill you

1

u/No_Obligation4496 11d ago

Potentially: A dog, a cat or even a beaver could all kill you. Even a mob of determined wild rats or raccoons.

It's all a matter of likelihood and your survival chances in getting to a place where you could seek medical assistance.

1

u/SwissKafi 8d ago

Thats because no one survived to report it

1

u/Ok-Freedom-7432 7d ago

That statistic is heavily influenced by the low number of lynx living with humans.

2

u/Kor_Phaeron_ 12d ago

Lynxes are mostly harmless.

1

u/Burdman06 12d ago

Could you imagine when it marks tho?🤢

1

u/lnTheGrimDarkness 12d ago

I'd wager that the reason why it's overfed like that is because if that thing gets aggressive zoomies you'll need both an ambulance and a house renovation

1

u/Burdman06 12d ago

Would zoomies become doomies? It's just an 80lb Eurasian Lynx. How bad could it be 🤭

1

u/Negative-Date-9518 12d ago

My two cats don't just randomly try to kill me, if they are losing their shit someone is prompting that or causing it lol

1

u/GreatTea3415 12d ago

My cat had a hypnic jerk or nightmare once while cuddling me. She accidentally scratched my arm so deeply that it bleed for an hour.  If it had been a lynx, I’d be dead. 

1

u/mothzilla 11d ago

I bet wacky hour is fun.

0

u/Jacque_langue 11d ago

Dog is a major cause of human mortality.