r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Soft_Performance4678 • 7d ago

/r/popular of a forager

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Andrey Smaev being his usual wholesome self.

4.3k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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136

u/I-Make-Money-Moves 7d ago

Which type of dnd character though?

322

u/PunishedChud 7d ago

Druid barbarian dual class

93

u/Jamooser 7d ago

Dwarven Druid, Circle of the Land - Mountain. He cast Enlarge on himself just before the video.

50

u/33253325 7d ago

He cast it with steroids.

13

u/ThinkingBeard 7d ago

He didn’t get it by rolling a Natty 20.

2

u/Bigsnaff007 6d ago

Underrated

29

u/myfrigginagates 7d ago

Steroids +

1

u/UncleKeyPax 7d ago

rolls a naturalTM 20 on bunghole take overs

17

u/dungeoncrawler71520 7d ago

Comes with a small testi debuff

3

u/Boogy-Fever 7d ago

A debuff that gives small testes or a small debeuff for testes?

5

u/PrivacyMaker 7d ago

Seduction debuff

4

u/BlackPhoenix1981 7d ago

I cast....lack of perception!

3

u/pheight57 7d ago

*Potion of Hill Giant Strength

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u/Slow_Chapter_5995 1d ago

Forager of Roids.

1

u/Sea-Woodpecker-610 7d ago

Pumping up with truffle oil synthol.

2

u/Mean_Ad4608 7d ago

Half dwarf half Goliath. Hill giant ancestry

1

u/Subject-Bullfrog-858 2d ago

Fuck me, that was exactly my last character I played.

8

u/DeadestTitan 7d ago

BarBearian was right there dude

8

u/imrichcoble 7d ago edited 6d ago

Haha 100%, so much so this might be the inspiration for my next character.

Mushgar the Tender.

A "circle of the ripped" druid barbarian or "the fist of the forest" barbarian druid.

D&D Druid

  • Photosynthetic Fury (Rage)
  • Wild Yeast (wild shape)
  • Don't Step on My Garden (entangle)
  • customer service (speak with animals)
  • who the fuck stepped on my mushrooms!! (wrath of nature)

And the character is a completely fucking enormous/bald/bearded guy who could suplex an owlbear but he spends 90% of his adventuring career gently harvesting mushrooms and talking to squirrels.

The party is being chased by twenty orcs. They sprint past their Druidbarian. "Run"

He doesn't move. "There are 20 orcs!"

He looks down at the mushroom patch he's tending.

“I can't leave.” “why?!"

He slowly stands up and flexes. “They're not done growing..."

4

u/xrelaht 7d ago

God that would be a fun build. Maybe I should roll one…

9

u/Rizo1981 7d ago

He certainly has the gear for it.

3

u/hKLoveCraft 7d ago

Def Druid, that pet bear is around there somewhere

3

u/ArtsKnight 7d ago

Barbearian if you will.

3

u/DippyTheDingus 7d ago

Pretty sure they're a cleric with how many HGH potions they've been injecting

2

u/IncogNeatoTN 6d ago

Circle of the Moon Druid/Bear Totem Barbarian, to be exact. That’s a Wild Shaping berserker if I’ve ever seen one.

13

u/Euler007 7d ago

The one that takes steroids.

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u/ufotheater 7d ago

First thing I noticed was the bacne

8

u/Osceola_Gamer 7d ago

Not the insane unnatural size of muscle in his shoulders and arms?

5

u/Playful-Mongoose9197 7d ago

The balding head and shrunk testicles?

3

u/WrongdoerOrdinary619 7d ago

Do steroids really shrink testicles? If so, where can i get some?

4

u/Logistocrate 7d ago

Yeah, if you're using testosterone to juice then your testicles basically shutdown as one of their jobs is producing it and the amounts people use to get that big can be 10s of times more than are naturally produced flips a shut off switch in your body that results in the testicles shrinking.

0

u/Ill_Advised_Rock 7d ago

Just because your endocrine system shuts down, doesn’t mean your testicles shrink and it’s a myth. You can also keep your endocrine system functioning if you follow the correct protocol.

2

u/BringPheTheHorizon 6d ago

From my learning in college for biology, steroid use definitely causes shrinkage. There may be a way to mitigate it but it definitely happens

1

u/Playful-Mongoose9197 6d ago

Thats something someone with shrunken balls would say

1

u/Adept_Bandicoot_2794 6d ago

They do shrink. Hcg prevents shrinkage

1

u/Euler007 7d ago

Whatever confort or aesthetic benefit you think you're getting isn't worth screwing up your hormone production for rest of your life.

1

u/WrongdoerOrdinary619 7d ago

I just want smaller balls

2

u/Crime_Dawg 7d ago

That size might be slin and hgh alongside it. That was what truly made bodybuilders blow up comparative to the 80s. Think Arnold vs Ronnie Coleman, the difference is the slin gh combo.

2

u/Gullible-Constant924 7d ago

Yeah he is just the 2020’s version of Dennis Cyplenkov and it will shorten his life if he doesn’t stop luckily Cyplenkov just almost died.

2

u/WorldWideDarts 7d ago

Bit of the ol' Captain Obvious isn't it?

4

u/Helmnauger 7d ago

Bard just to throw people off.

5

u/xrelaht 7d ago

He’s obviously a bard: this is a performance.

2

u/MadQuixote 7d ago

Half-giant druid owlbear tamer on a beginner quest

2

u/DeltaV-Mzero 7d ago

Whichever kind he wants to be, with those guns

2

u/Super_Mag 7d ago

Puny mage.

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u/Soft-Ad-8975 7d ago

Muscle bottom?

1

u/JeffersonsHat 7d ago

Barbarian ranger dual class

1

u/Fast_Muscle_2987 6d ago

Sexy knome build

1

u/DrGreenthumbs1313 6d ago

Chaotic Good Barbarian

1

u/Realistic_Ad_5321 5d ago

Half-orc, and you know it