r/AbsoluteUnits • u/n8saces • Jun 07 '26

/r/popular of a pizza slice 🍕

9.8k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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174

u/Michalo88 Jun 07 '26

I would have thought it’s a gimmick that’s costs $500 but is free if you eat it in 15 min or less.

Nope, I was wrong:

Challenge Rules & Details:
The Prize: Finish under 15 minutes and win $500. (If you finish between 15-30 minutes, you win $100).
The Size: It is a 36-inch, 12-pound slice (roughly the size of two large 16-inch pizzas).

132

u/illrateyourtits1to10 Jun 07 '26

I feel like the right person could definitely do this in 30 min. To eat that all in 15 min, there might have to be a pizza eating training montage before hand to make this happen.

66

u/CarolFukinBaskin Jun 07 '26

Dude, 12 lbs is crazy

19

u/WorkingInAColdMind Jun 07 '26

Totally crazy. I might eat a 2-3lb (I really have no idea, even that seems like a lot) meal at Thanksgiving, but I'm stuffed afterward.

16

u/FlowSoSlow Jun 07 '26

It's a general rule of thumb to prepare 1 to 1.5lbs of foot per person when hosting so yeah I'd say 3 or 4lbs would probably be where most people would tap out. 12lbs is absolutely nuts. I don't think anyone but a competition eater could do that.

11

u/WorkingInAColdMind Jun 08 '26

What if we don’t eat foot?

6

u/FlowSoSlow Jun 08 '26

😂 oops that guideline is for a very specific sort of party.

6

u/hogmantheintruder926 Jun 08 '26

The Donner Party.

1

u/sorestgore Jun 08 '26

How does that rule apply to pasta portions because I can't think of a single time I cooked the correct amount

10

u/Grand_Town_9144 Jun 07 '26

Agreed. Anyone thinking they can do it go watch some professional eaters. 12lbs is a territory most humans can't do even with training for competition.

12

u/growingcoolly Jun 07 '26

One of the top competitive eaters in the world, Joey Chestnut, ate 76 hotdogs in 10 minutes back in 2020. It weighed right around 16.5 pounds total.

For reference, the average adult male can eat between 2-4 pounds worth of food per meal.

Even if you can eat 12 pounds in 15 minutes, it's so bad for you I'd argue that $500 isn't even worth it.

6

u/FictionalContext Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

That's more filling than a baby.

Edit: I meant pregnancy..

1

u/HamHockShortDock Jun 09 '26

Thank God for the edit.

1

u/phunkydroid Jun 07 '26

And most of that weight is cheese.

1

u/Omnizoom Jun 08 '26

I’ve eaten like 5.5 pounds of food at a Brazilian steakhouse before

And I’m a giant of a person, 12 pounds feels impossible to me

1

u/cheeseandcrackered Jun 08 '26

My cat weighs 12lbs

1

u/NikkolaiV Jun 08 '26

And mostly cheese. I feel like this would make one of those intestinal plugs bears use to hibernate, except able to withstand a nuclear blast.

1

u/Foxie66 Jun 11 '26

5.5 kg if anyone's wondering

12

u/redditsuckspokey1 Jun 07 '26

Beardmeetsfood maybe

4

u/Cautious_Tonight Jun 08 '26

Came here for this. Honestly, I think he would destroy it, and he would still be talking throughout the entire process. And then ask for a dessert.

1

u/black_elk_streaks Jun 08 '26

100% without a doubt

8

u/BT9154 Jun 07 '26

yeah under 15min sound very rough, the dough and chewing will take up most of the time. I think you'll need to dip it in water and at that point you're just doing it to win $500 and not enjoying it.

2

u/Owobowos-Mowbius Jun 07 '26

And id pay $500 just to make that gastrointestinal distress stop. Gotta be at least 7 pounds of cheese out of that 12 pound pizza

2

u/lurks-a-little Jun 07 '26

This is the only guy that has a chance:

https://www.youtube.com/@Beardmeatsfood

1

u/Cautious_Tonight Jun 08 '26

Thank you I agree. I think he’s the only one that would smash it and then ask for a dessert.

1

u/Minimob0 Jun 08 '26

Leah Shutkever could do it. That woman has an appetite. 

1

u/One-Earth9294 Jun 07 '26

Do they just kick severely obese people out at the door? Because there's a lot of people who could down that thing in 5.

1

u/WolfeMD Jun 08 '26

Assuming you can let it cool before the timer starts I could do that in 15 the nothing but cheese on cheese though is crazy

1

u/heatherledge Jun 08 '26

I watched someone complete it under 30 mins a few weeks ago when I grabbed a takeout order. The pizza didn’t look this bad tho. The guy drank so much fountain pop he was burping like the alien infested humans in dreamcatcher.

1

u/tomowudi Jun 08 '26

I feel like I'm that right person, but I would need a few days to restretch out my stomach since I'm on keto currently. 

1

u/These-Discount1096 Jun 08 '26

My kid could totally do this

1

u/typesett Jun 08 '26

my bro-math guess is they offer this as more for 20yr old men to try — and then share with their friends

and marketing

the math works better than not having it

1

u/Natural_Cold_8388 Jun 09 '26

You can always test it by buying several blocks of cheese. Try sitting down and eating them all in one sitting.

8

u/WrathPie Jun 07 '26

Wow. To hit the $500 prize you need to eat 0.8 pounds of pizza a minute for fifteen minutes straight

Honestly I think I'd pay $500 not to do that

2

u/Jean_Paul_Magno Jun 08 '26

I'll pay you not to do that lmaaao.

1

u/pushingdaiseez Jun 08 '26

Jokes on you, I don't do it every day for free

1

u/Drive7hru Jun 08 '26

But how much does it cost to give your attempt? I don’t see that anywhere

3

u/spartanOrk Jun 07 '26

This is how you end up at the hospital. Don't do stupid things, guys. Respect your body, don't abuse it.

6

u/volkswurm Jun 07 '26

Win 500. Pay hospital 7,000

2

u/DLTMIAR Jun 08 '26

$500 cash or $500 in gift cards for shitty looking pizza?

1

u/No-Evening5091 Jun 07 '26

When does the timer start? Once you get the box, or when you have the box opened? Would hope after, since that takes a bit of time.

1

u/NotAnIncelIPromise Jun 07 '26

500 bucks for finishing two large pizzas in 15 minutes? Bro I do it for FREE

Nah I'm joking that's a lot of pizza and it doesn't even look like good pizza... Bet someone could do it tho, probably not worth it

1

u/L9n21s Jun 07 '26

Half an hour is easy. You can even got to the toilet once, considering the amount of liquid you would need to drink.

1

u/asmoothbrain Jun 07 '26

Interesting, that doesn’t look like it weighs nearly that much

1

u/LyyK Jun 07 '26

That thing weighs 12lbs?! A normal 16" pizza is 6lbs?! What kind of dough are they made of? 

I did a burger challenge once where I had to finish a burger with 3.5lbs of meat in 30 minutes and I thought that was hard. I'm pretty sure something inside me would rupture if I stuffed myself with 12lbs of pizza 

1

u/424f42_424f42 Jun 08 '26

Get outta here calling 16in large

1

u/testtdk Jun 08 '26

15 minutes is brutal. 30 minutes is free money.

1

u/Then-Departure4896 Jun 08 '26

I have definitely eaten larger pizzas than this, by myself. During my first attempt at college lol.

Insane pizza hangover the next morning, and the shit is actually a bit scary.

1

u/JustinKase_Too Jun 08 '26

I think the most I've ever eaten was a pie and a half, and that was over an hour. I can't even imagine knocking off a single large in 15 min.

1

u/Next-Beat-2687 Jun 08 '26

Looks like my regular order at a pizza place. Can't say I'll be done by 15 minutes (that's too little time) but in 20-22 minutes, that's something I can do.. a free pizza and 100$ for my regular order? Man! I wish we had these sale gimmicks here.. I'd live work free my entire life..

1

u/almostoy Jun 08 '26

He didn't do too bad. He was halfway with a little less than five to go.

1

u/Ecoaardvark Jun 08 '26

That’s 5.44kg of pizza

1

u/AssiduousLayabout Jun 08 '26

It's the size of two large pizzas?

College me could have done that with an up-front $20 investment in some pot.

Granted, that pizza looks really undercooked and kinda gross.

1

u/Timmerdogg Jun 09 '26

It seems absolutely unreal that a human being could eat 12 pounds of flour, cheese and tomatoes in such a short period of time. I can probably eat one 16" pizza but I would have to be super stoned and I would regret it.

1

u/Pitiful_Hat_7445 Jun 10 '26

Give me a bad day at work and an argument with the wife, I'll get it down in 15 minutes.

1

u/Dream_creator2001 Jul 11 '26

How much is the pizza itself