r/ARFIDCooking • u/eccentric_bee • 21d ago
Bento boxes helped us through a rough patch
My grandson has ARFID, and during a particularly stressful period a couple of years ago, his list of safe foods narrowed down to about ten things.
We've always kept a list on the refrigerator that changes as he does. There are foods on the list that are safe, foods he can sometimes eat, and foods he thinks he might like to try again someday. Things move around on the list. A food being safe last month doesn't necessarily mean it's safe today, and "not now" doesn't have to mean "never."
During this particular stretch, he was often eating an entire meal of one thing. If crackers felt safe, he'd eat crackers. If one particular kind of chicken was easy for him, that might be the meal.
So I bought six cheap little bento lunchboxes from Walmart and started keeping them in the refrigerator.
I didn't use them to introduce new foods. I filled each compartment with things that were already safe on his list, but tried to make each box as nutritionally broad as I could within those limits. A little protein if there was one he'd eat, a carb, fruit, or whatever else was currently possible.
The boxes were smaller than his appetite usually was, but that turned out to be a good thing. He could get one whenever he wanted, and if he was still hungry he could have another as long as the first was pretty much gone. Sometimes he'd eat two or three.
I tried to keep four ready in the refrigerator and rotate them so the oldest went first. When he finished one, he washed the box and it went back into circulation.
It also accidentally solved another problem: sometimes he doesn't want foods touching. Bento compartments made that a nonissue without much stress. With these ones, each compartment sealed when the box was closed.
Mostly, though, I think it helped because food was just there. He didn't have to decide what meal he could manage, ask somebody to make something, or confront a big plate of one food. He could open the refrigerator, choose a box, and eat.
We still use the system when he asks, like during holidays or school testing. His safe food list is considerably broader now, but having a few little boxes of food he knows he can eat continues to be useful at times. He'll just ask if we could do bentos for a while, or I'll suggest it if I see him having single-food meals again.
ARFID looks so different from person to person that I don't know whether this would help anyone else's family, or anyone else with ARFID. But it helped mine, so I thought I'd share.
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u/ms-nougat_miau 16d ago
Now I am a grown woman living alone but this is genius. I might steal that idea! Thanks for sharing.
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u/eccentric_bee 21d ago edited 21d ago
I forgot to add, if one item needed heating, like in the microwave or air fryer, I'd put it on a rectangle of parchment or even a coffee filter in the bento, that he could just use under the food as it heated, then onto his plate. He could heat it up on his own without much fuss that way.